156. Society Is Moving In A Direction


October 17th, 2022

1 hr 5 mins 26 secs

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  • A return of many-storied adventure game developers.
  • A point and click adventure game that changed the trajectory of your life.
  • Suspenders as an architectural feature.
  • Onesie pajamas with a trap door.
  • People sneaking up behind you and trying to unbutton your poop flap.
  • Thoughts that are meant to remain unthought.
  • The famous elongated "some."
  • A marketing executive saying "nobody will know what a 'tetralogy' is."
  • Whether your game studio logo has a sound.
  • Console startup noises.
  • The button your loved ones can press on your gravestone to hear the Dreamcast startup sound.
  • King Solomoning the gif-vs-gif debate.
  • The governing body that decides whether your death is cool enough to warrant a gif of your death on your tombstone.
  • The kind of people who gravitate to a job that rates everyone's deaths on a five-star scale.
  • The IP situation surrounding your gravestone's looping wav button.
  • Your tombstone jukebox that plays David Bowie songs when people put a quarter in and the quarters all end up in your casket and if David Bowie wants them he can damn well come and get them.
  • Wagering on your ability to read emergent situations.
  • Electric Football.
  • Covering a metal plate with quarters and flipping the switch that makes the plate vibrate, creating the quarter configuration for optimal money gouging.
  • Becoming really good at beating a rigged game.
  • Becoming really good at funnel cake.
  • Dentists not understanding the motivations people have for drinking soda.
  • Largest Sip.
  • The liminal space between a Sip and a Gulp.
  • Gaming the outcome in Eenie Meenie Miney Moe.
  • Whether Eenie Meenie Miney Moe is a solved game.
  • A great opportunity to practice believing the lies that we form our wesociety on.
  • When Billboard switched from a call-stores-and-ask data collection system to an automated system to gather song sales data, and rap and R&B suddenly started dominating the charts.
  • Rockists fudging the numbers.
  • The pros and cons of getting a Billboard Hot 100 hit.
  • Jukebox charts.
  • The Billboard Humming chart based on them listening to the songs people are humming to themselves on the street.
  • Who loves the radio hits that everyone you know hates? (People you don't know.)
  • Knowing where to stick that quarter.
  • White dudes making 17 minute songs.
  • Axis of Discourse.
  • A directory of mp3s in your Jellyfin server.
  • Napster pivoting to NFTs but nobody notices or cares.
  • Nostalgia for the Spanish Flu.
  • A giant ball of iron with life forms clinging to it.
  • The earth continuing to be a lump of iron no matter how badly we treat it.
  • Potential human extinction and whether birds would notice it.
  • A fully-automated human house of the near to far future.
  • A band of roving pranksters in the post-apocalypse who are running around transmitting bad Roomba firmware updates.
  • Rolling up on prom with your entourage of four Half-Life scientists and five Barneys.
  • Rolling up on the rap battle with your entourage of backup singer Roombas trailing behind you.
  • The Mad Max series as prepper porn.
  • A good shelf to rest on in the collective psyche.
  • Friend deterrent strategies.
  • How strategy disclosure alters the gameplay of Rock Paper Scissors.
  • Disclosing ahead of the game or Rock Paper Scissors that your strategy will be to punch your opponent repeatedly, and how that affects the way the game is played.
  • Satisfactory: an open-world factory building game.
  • Building your factories and then leaving them behind.
  • Emergent haunted houses in abandoned player-built structures in persistent-world multiplayer games.
  • Having an idea for a game feature and having to build the whole game to try the feature out.
  • Being scared of weird old crap.
  • Adding Pokemon to Minecraft.
  • The last gasp of mainstream PC gaming before phones happened.
  • An 11 year old game developer getting thrown into the Capitalist snake pit.
  • The Human Attention Zoo.
  • Kids (or adults) having goofs.
  • The Golden Age of the Moddable Game Engine.
  • Getting a job based on your Roblox portfolio.
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