4. Don't Freak Out, But I'm Arresting You
November 18th, 2019
1 hr 21 mins 44 secs
About this Episode
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- Elena is reading Cordyceps by Benedict_SC. https://archiveofourown.org/works/6178036/chapters/14154868
- Avery's solo album is on Bandcamp. https://averyburke.bandcamp.com/releases
- 2:58 Male pigeons feed their young with "crop milk" produced in glands in their throat. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crop_milk
- Fennec Foxes. https://duckduckgo.com/?q=fennec&iar=images&iax=images&ia=images
- "Squid will survive and may even flourish under even the worst-case ocean acidification scenarios." https://news-oceanacidification-icc.org/2019/06/14/squid-could-thrive-under-climate-change/
- The Honeyguide will show you the honey. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Honeyguide
- Do birds sweat? https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20061208141845AAtuY9L
- "Several months before his death, Lee had an operation to remove the sweat glands from his armpits." And this may have lead to his death from heat stroke. https://www.history.com/news/bruce-lee-death-mystery-solved-sweat-glands
- 18:07 Elena's friends use lexicalized emoji to communicate.
- Alice and Kev, homeless Sims. https://aliceandkev.wordpress.com/
- Happy Birthday, Wanda June. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Happy_Birthday,_Wanda_June
- 35:08 The story of the guy who wanted and then didn't want a mattress.
- Vintage Pump Organs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oiqnINpIz74
- 44:46 Singing cowboys and their ethical codes, which demanded their young fans keep clean and invest in savings accounts. http://www.cowboyway.com/GeneAutry.htm
- Alice's Restaurant Massacree: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPx2t7xoF1k
- 55:40 Dimensions in candy space: chocolate, fruit, ...?
- All figs contain a dissolved wasp. https://gardencollage.com/inspire/wild-earth/true-dead-wasps-inside-figs/
- "An emerald cockroach wasp (Ampulex compressa) can control the minds of roaches with a sting of its venom." https://www.nationalgeographic.com/news/2018/02/parasitic-wasps-parkinsons-future-research-spd/
- The neotenized Domesticated Red Fox: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domesticated_red_fox
- Humans may have domesticated themselves: https://www.sciencenews.org/article/how-humans-maybe-domesticated-themselves
- Living in a house with instruments on the wall because you're a musician, not because you're a massive hipster.
- Scientists who would describe cottage cheese as creamy.
- Pigeon milk cappuccinos.
- Animals that thrive in the city biome.
- Anaerobic squid thriving in the oceans we ruined.
- Honey-loving birds ditching their lame badger companions for fire-making humans.
- Flame-throwing badgers demanding bird exes take them back.
- Birds sweating out of their throats.
- East Asian people have different earwax from white people.
- Going deaf every few months due to earwax buildup.
- Monetizing your overactive sebaceous glands.
- Transplanting superior Asian sebaceous glands into your shitty white person's body.
- What do mammals have that birds haven't taken from us?
- The kiwi bird has ostrich-sized eggs.
- Realizing that the kiwi isn't the size of a kiwi.
- Thanking people by applying a turkey to them.
- Missing the rest of the conversation because you were trying to find the perfect emoji.
- Needing more than one train emoji.
- Starving because your food options are equidistant.
- Building the perfect Sims family so you can wreck their lives.
- Walking into a random house and the occupants being fine with it.
- Debuting moon landing footage you found in the bathroom.
- Opening up a cabinet at NASA and moon rocks spilling out.
- Your bosses at NASA not really caring when you destroy old SETI documents.
- Cats climbing discarded mattresses to hunt.
- Sense of thirst being hereditary.
- Kidney stones as a delayed sign of thirst.
- Finally getting to the part where the guy wants a mattress.
- Being finished loving the mattress.
- The Sunken Mattress Fallacy.
- Discovering the organ you just destroyed was from the 19th century.
- Playing music by touching the bones of a dead creature.
- Being the de facto authority because everyone else knows even less.
- Putting money into Gene Autrey's savings account.
- Building good citizens through singing cowboys.
- Issuing an arrest warrant for secret reasons.
- Appreciating the 19th-century sheriff's weird forehead while waiting to be arrested.
- Sitting there on the Group W bench.
- Teacher rewarding you with the cheapest possible candy.
- Mistaking your deodorant for tamarind candy.
- Being weird in the way that figs are weird.
- Fertilizing figs with your dissolved corpse.
- Sharing your fig with a friend so only one of you eats a dissolved wasp.
- Not believing new information because it's implausible that you didn't already know it.
- Wasps parasiting other wasps.
- Figs no longer being considered vegan.
- Closing your tiger restaurant because tigers are infeasible to farm.
- Accidentally inventing puppies when you just wanted your fox farm to be safer.
- Collecting a breeding population of raccoons.
- Rats escaping their cage so they can cuddle you.
- Outliving your pet parrot.
- Being an ageless rat guardian.
- Orcas rubbing themselves on flat rocks and nobody knows why.
- Orcas rubbing themselves on flat rocks because they're itchy.
- An octopus friend to untangle wires for you.
- Uplifting the octopus race merely by lengthening their lifespan.
- Uplifted octopodes inventing Twitter and becoming miserable.
- Thinking your chimp knows ASL because it's mirroring your actions.
- Worshiping Cthulhu in a secular humanist kind of way.
- Making jokes no-one will get instead of doing proper marketing.