The Screaming Man Simulator

00:00:00
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00:51:15

November 11th, 2019

51 mins 15 secs

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Lords:

Topics:

Microtopics:

  • Accidentally only booking guests with your same first initial.
  • Values systems driving design decisions.
  • Taking only the fun classes in college.
  • Children as an ideal audience for storytelling.
  • A job fair for monsters.
  • Black people being friends with metaphors for black people.
  • Only wanting to go to school after it's unavailable to you.
  • Never going to museums where you live because that's what tourists do.
  • Paying to do manual labor to entertain your infant son.
  • Insisting on talking to babies even though they don't understand you.
  • Not knowing who Arcade Fire is.
  • Knowing who Arcade Fire is.
  • Spraying guitar samples into the DAW just to fill space.
  • Going up to strangers talking in a bar to tell them their conversation is boring.
  • Tweeting with as much context resiliency as possible.
  • Hearing an instrumental in the 90s and wondering about it for the rest of your life.
  • The saddest accordion solo.
  • A laughing baby indicating lack of cruelty.
  • Library/production music that is just as avant garde as your personal work.
  • Corporate contexts appropriating music that was popular 10 years ago.
  • When the retro discount kicks in for production music.
  • Absorbing your friend's shoegaze album into your video game.
  • Reinventing General MIDI for your alternate timeline's soundtrack.
  • Picking a name for your combination pinball parlor and print shop.
  • The timeline of pinball speed.
  • The timeline of pinball interactivity.
  • Analog video games frustrating the speed running scene.
  • Video game sound effects in the reality that never invented the speaker.
  • Switching around the pneumatic tubes on your brother's Call of Duty sound setup.
  • Sneaking into an amusement park to play the calliope.
  • Calliope MIDI playback as an online service.
  • Robotic percussion as an online service.
  • Sleep studies are take-home tests now.
  • Stopping breathing 25 times per hour.
  • Acclimating to your Darth Vader mask.
  • Never living to regret your bad decisions.
  • Not being sure how to pronounce your own name.
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