141. Toast In Its Original Format

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Lords:

• Avery
• Jesse

Topics:

• Laserdisc
• Tracing the lineage of racehorses on Wikipedia
• Bread is too wide to fit in toasters
• https://twitter.com/mogwai_poet/status/1335354217335148546/photo/1
• Variants of bowling, now mostly lost to history, are like glimpses into possible worlds metaphysically close to our own

Microtopics:

• How to sound like a douchebag if you are a programmer who lives in Oakland.
• A Social Security Number that has way too many sixes in it.
• A disc that is the same size as an LP but looks like a CD and has a movie on it.
• Arcade games breaking whenever you transport them.
• Laserdiscs rusting.
• Integrating the likely degradation of the viewing medium into the piece itself.
• The Matrix on Betamax.
• The guy who owns all the Betamax players in your province.
• The canonical paths to becoming a Laserdisc collector.
• All the criteria used to curate the Criterion Collection.
• The advantages and disadvantages of CAV discs over CLV.
• Getting off the couch to flip the disc over halfway through the movie.
• Asking your robot butler to flip the Laserdisc over.
• Potoooooooo.
• Seeing the name of the Wii for the first time and wondering if it's a typo for World War 2 or if it's a typo for WiFi.
• Finding the They Live sunglasses and finally being able to read the Snickers ads.
• The three racehorses that all thoroughbred racehorses are descended from.
• Knowing more about the history of racehorses than about your own family tree, because racehorses are worth more than people.
• War booty from the battle of Vienna.
• The General Studbook.
• Going blind in one eye from staying up for three days straight doing logarithms.
• Bell Right Hooks and Cuban Menstrual Crisis.
• Whether the clown face registry still exists for juggalos.
• Nothing Sweet About Bees.
• What happened to bread?
• Your basic 4:3 bread vs. 4K ultra-wide bread.
• Your favorite toaster from the 1940s.
• A four slice toaster kind of day.
• Making food better with science and it's going to be way better than nature because it's science.
• Convincing Mr. Smeg not to put his name on the toasters his company manufactures.
• What market research firm decided that podcast listeners want underwear and mattresses.
• Constant angular velocity: the only way to rewind a movie.
• A magnetic poetry set that includes the word "Kafkaesque."
• How Kafkaesque the miscreant insects are.
• Whether Jim has ever touched any other human being.
• How Zoomers don't know about Graggle Simpson.
• A possible scenario that is metaphysically close to our own.
• How metaphysically close Canada is to the United States.
• Getting up at 4pm every day and bowling.
• A 3D model recreation of five-pin bowling.
• The amount of data visualization competence that went into dimensions.com.
• Candlepin and Duckpin bowling.
• The dimensions of various famous bowlers.
• Getting a parakeet and finding out how much water it displaces.
• Making a flask out of a parakeet so people think you just brought your pet parakeet to work and aren't drinking on the job.
• Buying a propane tank to use as a water bottle.
• What's wrong with Jim's listeners?
• Karate tournaments in the 80s and 90s.
• Assuming Avery's identity and looking in the mirror.
• To Mock A Mockingbird.
• Certified Bird Mockers.