71. There's No Chicken Nine Because Chicken Six Seven Ate Nine


March 1st, 2021

1 hr 7 mins 43 secs

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  • Elena
  • Quil


  • Some people put on music and then just talk over it instead of singing along?? Why
  • Being the only person in a movie theater/concert
  • A Spirograph but for your butt
  • Daniel asks "Legacy board games such as Pandemic Legacy or Gloomhaven."
  • Weird sleeping apparatuses
  • "House Special Live Frog in Hot Stone Pot" on the delivery menu


  • A girl who is raised as a boy in pre-revolutionary France and becomes Marie Antoinette's guard.
  • Turn of the millennium club music.
  • Finding out that Itsy Bitsy Spider has been about perseverance all this time.
  • Having to restrain yourself from singing along when you're at the opera.
  • Trying to eat dinner but you can't eat because you need to sing along to your sea shanty playlist.
  • Trying to eat bites of dinner during the verses because you keep having to sing along to the choruses.
  • Properties of sea shanties.
  • Having a different song for every task.
  • Everybody performing music before recorded music was a thing, because that was how you had music in your life.
  • The horrible historical handwriting that historians never show you.
  • Celebrating the new decade with Cats (2019) and when you walk out of the theater you're the only person in the building.
  • Seeing Pitch Perfect 3 at 10pm on Christmas Eve and probably ruining a bunch of theater employees plans to have a party in that empty theater.
  • When you're the only person in the theater, asking the projectionist to pause the movie while you go to the bathroom.
  • Being the last person seeing an awful live band because everyone else walked out, and realizing that if you too walk out, they'll be playing to an empty room.
  • A drummer and a guitarist who are both playing too loud to hear each other.
  • The only live performance you've ever walked out on.
  • Pooping in a spiral.
  • Nature's sharpie.
  • The origin of topics.
  • A disc that you sit on.
  • A combination nausea inducer and butt spirograph.
  • Cake icing videos.
  • Asking your son what his life is a commentary on.
  • A shark embedded in a formaldehyde solution.
  • Work that aggressively annoys the art community.
  • Ironic cocaine.
  • Sneaking into the museum to hang up your own work.
  • Taking photos of a painting and then destroying the original and then taking photos of the photos and destroying the original artist.
  • Modifying the rules as you play the game.
  • Opening up more and more of your board game every time you play, like an Advent calendar.
  • A board game that you learn like a video game.
  • Memorizing a dozen page book before you can start playing a game.
  • Copyrighting the concept of a legacy.
  • Proposing to your wife by intentionally losing a board game over and over again.
  • The thing you were working towards screwing you over and now you have to undo it.
  • Trying to think of a board game you've played more than a few times.
  • Really looking forward to a board game and finally getting it and deciding to just watch your friends play.
  • Whether it's apparati or apparatodes.
  • The doublet of apparat.
  • Wanting to be hyper correct in everything you do.
  • Buying a tent to go over your bed because your blackout curtains aren't cutting it.
  • Buying a bunch of weird pillows to compensate for the position your arms automatically get into when you sleep.
  • How CPAP machines all have a SIM card and phone home with your sleep behavior and there's no way to turn it off.
  • Nasal pillows.
  • Sleeping with a weird contraption blowing air into your face constantly.
  • Discovering that it is much easier to fall asleep when you are very tired at the end of the day.
  • Ranking your morningness and eveningness.
  • Sleeping in a hammock.
  • Making a nest of pillows around you.
  • Putting on your velcro pajamas and jumping onto the velcro wall to fall asleep.
  • Your velcro bed waking you up with a loud ripping sound every time you switch positions.
  • Time-release velcro.
  • Ice velcro.
  • Making a salt igloo at the salt flats.
  • A weighted blanket that is so heavy you can't get up until a crane rescues you.
  • Sleeping under a chainmail sheet.
  • A quilt made out of beanbags.
  • The first thing you searched for when you got on the internet.
  • Youtube videos about your idealized farm life.
  • Ordering a pet frog from your Szechuan delivery menu.
  • Getting Hot Pot delivered and the Pot arrives cold.
  • Ordering Chicken 65 because there are no other numbered items on the menu.
  • Not wanting to eat animals whole because there's poop in there.
  • Frog Fractions 65.
  • If Chicken 6 was so good, why isn't there a Chicken 6 5?
  • A Kidz Bop version of Ocean's 11.
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