335. Sex, Drugs, Rock and Roll: Pick Any Two

March 23rd, 2026

1 hr 11 mins 28 secs

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aubrianne andrew

About this Episode

Lords:

Topics:

Microtopics:

  • Plugging moving.
  • Apps that don't do things or have functionality.
  • Wearing one of those blood pressure cuffs all day.
  • The treadmill hacking into your heart rate monitor.
  • Getting your heart rate up by being aggravated at terrible exercise apps.
  • Video games that only work with first party controllers because they patch the controller firmware.
  • The only team that was permitted to alter the microcode on the Nintendo 64's GPU.
  • Reading every Hugo award winning novel.
  • Sci-fi authors in the 50s being obsessed with advancements in psychiatry.
  • What if there was an empire that spanned a continent.
  • Drinking a potion every morning to address your ADHD.
  • Dissolving your gummy vitamin in liquid nitrogen and/or
  • Looking forward to the next time you get sick so you can take NyQuil again.
  • The Snow Queen by Joan D. Vinge.
  • Why they let women write books now.
  • Advantages of AuDHD.
  • The Hugo award, invented by the protagonist of Hugo's House of Horrors.
  • Knock-off Sierra games.
  • Feed the Ducks.
  • The one with the Spider-Bat.
  • Stealth plugging a classic Pico-8 game.
  • Independently inventing Frog Fractions.
  • Not-Vector Art.
  • Making games that don't have a secret thing in them.
  • Making Pizza Panda without ever telling anyone what you're working on.
  • Picking up a mouse with hats.
  • Just make a dumb thing that's silly and you can make fun gifs of it.
  • Splore 'em if you got 'em.
  • XAMWWSKH, or "Exam Whiskey"
  • Curses, or ncurses.
  • Walking around this maze and running into this guy and suddenly you're playing a minigame.
  • Whether weird shit keeps happening in Pac-Man, or happens only once.
  • Why wait at all? Just wake up each day and be surprised.
  • Aren't we all just building mazes for ourselves?
  • Why sports games still exist.
  • Why do people play sports video games when they could play sports in real life?
  • Snapping your fingers in order to better internalize the poem.
  • What have you over-intellectualized in your life?
  • Your particular brainotype.
  • Learning about muscles, joints and physiology.
  • A bicycle reflector they put on the moon so they could shoot lasers at it.
  • Measuring diagrams during your lecture.
  • The astronomer who lost his nose.
  • Revealing that you've drawn a moustache on Orion's Belt.
  • Learning to read words by looking at a spectrogram.
  • Who knows what the Danes are up to?
  • Things that are not widely known but can be described.
  • Looking at really old computer stuff because that's fun.
  • Beautiful art that nobody made on purpose.
  • Getting actors together in a room to read a scene together before discovering that that's exactly the wrong way to do video game voice acting.
  • Aphantasia but for audiation.
  • Inability to audiate at different volumes or on the stereo spectrum.
  • Focusing really hard to fall asleep.
  • Kick-starting your hypnagogic hallucination dream state.
  • Rolling that sleep boulder up the hill every day.
  • Retheming your 2026 Linux computer to look like Windows 95.
  • Downloading 20 years of email history.
  • Playing Hunt the Wumpus on your dad's SIM-1.
  • What game developers say now that "AI" means something else.
  • What "drone" used to mean, and also what it meant before that.
  • OpenRCT2 and FreeCiv.
  • Making your customers less nauseous before they sit on a bench.
  • Not having any restaurants at your theme park so that nobody throws up on your roller coaster.
  • Being unable to A/B test your brain because you only have one brain.
  • Having a variety of weirdos on Jorts dot horse.
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