221. Fisher-Price My First Right Click Menu
January 15th, 2024
1 hr 12 mins 39 secs
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About this Episode
Lords:
- Chris
- Alex
Topics:
- Living without software updates
- I like Cyberpunk 2077
- I had a friend who would argue with the people collecting signatures in support of a proposed law. Not about the proposal itself, but the methodology behind it.
- PIECE A SHIT, possibly by Sam Pink
Microtopics:
- Lords of Topics.
- Asking your mom if this Thanksgiving turkey is Frog Fractions 3.
- Haiku Hero.
- How to talk to the press.
- An email from the guy who sent me the quirky thing from before.
- The Last Biceps.
- Filling your house with electronics that continuously ask you to do things.
- How to interact with the Internet on an old un-updated computer.
- Snap craft something or other.
- Turning off Windows updates for over a year and nothing bad happens because security best practices are bullshit.
- Visiting twinbeard.com to find out about the beads in Jim's ears.
- Searching Google for the little balls in your ears.
- Your phone popping up a window saying "you're a year and a half out of date, would you like to update?" and hitting the back button as fast as you can.
- Windows updates adding AI functionality to MS Paint.
- Making uneducated guesses about how someone else's code works.
- Searching for a program on your computer and Windows gives you Bing results for that program's name.
- A sneaky hacker man doing non lethal takedowns.
- Making a complicated video game and then patching it into a completely different complicated video game after the guides have all been written.
- Trying to explain to someone why the story of Half-Life is cool and realizing halfway through your explanation that it's not that cool actually.
- Cool things that build immersion.
- A guy saying "have a seat" and a contextual actionicon appearing over a chair.
- Voluminous closets full of costumes for virtual dress-up.
- Delivering exposition in cars.
- All the weird things people will put on their body in the cyber future.
- A fictional city halfway between San Francisco and Los Angeles.
- Recovering a stolen painting by showing a satellite.
- A city with lots of neat stuff to do.
- Querulous Friend's Advocate.
- The Everyone Gets a Pony Initiative of 2023.
- Filibustering people collecting signatures in front of the grocery store.
- How much do you believe in the political causes you're promoting?
- Watching your friend play games in a little window on your second monitor.
- Mr. Feeny recording car AI voices.
- Getting into World of Warcraft because you are stressed about starting a new job.
- Level 1 Superman killing rats to collect 10 rat pelts.
- Fun ways to fight crowds of mooks.
- The things you see on your limbs when you see your limbs.
- Replacing all the mirrors with cyber mirrors.
- The doctor pulling out your cyber eyes and putting them in a drawer and all you can see is the inside of the drawer.
- Lost games dev techniques such as palette swaps.
- A screenshot of a book.
- A poem painting a picture of a time and place.
- Maybe Sam Pink.
- Writing a bunch of messages to someone and making their phone vibrate every five seconds for a full minute.
- Notification throttling.
- Fanciful technological panaceas.
- Ultra poetry where each line has animation and timing.
- Making a word wiggle in a sine wave to indicate that it's a spooky ghost noise.
- Poem Lords.
- Seven poems on the itinerary. (But we'll only have time for three of them.)