105. Ficus On A Leash

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October 25th, 2021

1 hr 9 mins 34 secs

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Lords:

Topics:

Microtopics:

  • Make game.
  • The properties of houseplants.
  • TikToks of feral houseplants.
  • Three people trying to remember the name of the musical starring Rick Moranis about carnivorous plant.
  • One (1) 2004 Toyota Camry, tan.
  • Speaker covers turning into sand.
  • Sometimes being in charge of your body and sometimes being in charge of your car and sometimes being in charge of both.
  • A make of cars as an enormous number of identical twins.
  • Paint is shirts for cars.
  • Whether paint is shirts for cars or tattoos for cars.
  • Coming home with a new nose and nobody recognizes you.
  • Cars doing most of their aging in instants.
  • Seeing a car for the first time in many years and being unsure whether it accumulated all those dents and scratches over many years, or if someone took a hammer to it five minutes ago.
  • An airplane outside of your house waiting for you to finish recording this podcast so you can board.
  • Plastic surgery for an airplane.
  • Getting tired looking at your aging car so you cover it with sweet blue LEDs and now nobody can ever look at it again.
  • Being sarcastic in movie for children who are too young to understand sarcasm.
  • What happens when young foolish screenwriters try to write wise old characters.
  • Bad ways of teaching history.
  • Teaching only the things you can test.
  • Learning how to extract meaning from the things you read.
  • Triaging the attention paid to your students so your ignore your best students who don't need your help but also ignoring your worst students because what the hell am I gonna do with this guy??
  • A fun movie depicting a series of events that happen.
  • Whether hitting people with sticks is fun.
  • Bastard Operator From Hell.
  • Sysadmins writing revenge fantasies on Usenet about screwing over their incompetent users.
  • Indie games from the early aughts that are playable on the Amiga and Commodore 64.
  • A sysadmin with a rocket launcher.
  • Pokey the Penguin.
  • Arctic Circle-Candy.
  • All the Pokey the Penguin fan games that came from the Pokey the Penguin mailing list.
  • Prodly the Puffin.
  • Parchment, the Z-Machine interpreter written in JavaScript.
  • 0-Hour Game Jam.
  • RPG Maker vs. RPG Maker '99.
  • Coming on the show and donating of your time and topics.
  • Indie games starting to exist now that mainstream games are made by dozens of people.
  • MadMaze.
  • LadderMan: He's a man! He's a ladder!
  • Whether the video for Freak on a Leash could be made today and still be western-style animation.
  • Extremely red coffee.
  • Whether they're pouring steaming blood into this coffee mug or maybe you just have Flux on.
  • Playing hopscotch at the precipice of a cliff.
  • A cop drawing a gun to stop you from jumping off a cliff.
  • Where's Hopscotch Girl?
  • The kind of person who would prominently display a cookie jar and never fill it.
  • A speeding bullet rapidly leaving a party like "this party sucks"
  • A hundred page forum thread arguing about whether the plane on a treadmill will take off.
  • Weird creatures that have eyes but no mouth and vice versa.
  • A bullet bee making bullet honey.
  • A music video that is just a Ganon fight with two posters firing bullets back and forth at each other.
  • A bullet intended to pierce someone's ear but it just goes right through their gauge.
  • A DOS program you can use with your SoundBlaster.
  • A blanket you can use to increase the strangeness of your dreams.
  • Whether most people have boring dreams or whether most people are just bad storytellers.
  • Things happening because of other things.
  • Dreams where the whole dream is that you know a fact.
  • How to know whether someone is the president of Nairobi.
  • Running on the path you used to walk on and seeing way more bugs per minute.
  • Gauging your mouth so that you can collect even more bugs while running.
  • Installing a whistle tip in your mouth so you make an incredibly loud whistling noise while running around.
  • Getting into blood doping just because you want to get high.
  • The nicest form of Mustard Gas.
  • Soaking your clothes with essential oil of lavender so passers by are like "I love the smell of lavender" and then they die because all the oxygen has been replaced with lavender.
  • The new exercise fad where you go running while looking behind you, terrified.
  • Bubb Rubb lauding Missile Tips. "The missiles go woooo!"
  • Being super into being witnessed.
  • Throwing a stumble scramble into your jogging routine and everybody around you panicking as they try to figure out what you're running from.
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