37. Fela Cooties

Download Subscribe
00:00:00
/
00:59:36
RSS Feed Download (54.6 MB) Link with Timestamp

July 6th, 2020

59 mins 36 secs

Link with Timestamp

Download MP3 (54.6 MB)

Your Hosts
Tags
jay beek

About this Episode

Support Topic Lords on Patreon and get episodes a week early!

Lords:

Topics:

Microtopics:

  • Adding even more Internet to your fake Internet.
  • Hearing someone pronounce their own name wrong in a YouTube video and shaking your fist at the screen.
  • Changing your name because you're just looking to make your way.
  • The multitude of four-letter B and K names in the demo scene.
  • Promoting your album because hopefully you'll finish it before this episode is out.
  • Dreaming your friend a horrible job history.
  • A pair of tongs with a sticker on them saying "Super Atheist."
  • The guy in the pharmacy whose only job is to not give people their prescription.
  • Getting your doctorate for free because you're dating a doctor.
  • Forgetting all about Peter Schmidt.
  • Buying chord pack after chord pack and eventually giving up and buying the ultra-rare G11/F# card from a collector.
  • An app that scans your Spotify play list and generates a list of constraints to write songs under.
  • A team of researchers writing the perfect song by surveying listeners about what elements of music that they like the most.
  • A team of researchers writing the worst possible song by surveying listeners about what elements of music that they hate the most.
  • A rap opera about life on the farm with a children's choir singing holiday and corporate jingles.
  • Breaking your jaw harp because your jaw is just too strong.
  • People hating different kinds of music in 2020 from what they hated in the 1990s.
  • The identity of the accordion player on the floppy disks Jim dropped as he was arrested by time travelers.
  • Round Robin Key Clicks From A Skype Call.
  • Waiting for CD-ROMs in the 90s being faster than modern web pages.
  • Clicking on Miles Davis' face and reading about Hard Bop.
  • A topic you are interested enough in to buy a CD-ROM about it.
  • Jobs paying well until investors realize they're money-losers.
  • One person's perspective on how all electronic music breaks down.
  • Information that is thorough and well-presented memetically dominating over information that is arguably more accurate but less accessible.
  • Finding a guide to obscure music genres and worrying that they might be magic spells.
  • Eating a bunch of weird bananas and deciding that all bananas basically taste the same.
  • Militant banana forums rallying the troops to take down Jim's boring banana opinions.
  • Recognizing differences between apple cultivars.
  • Growing up eating the Red Delicious because it's red and delicious.
  • Which apple cultivar Snow White ate.
  • The apple core as a social construct.
  • Why the Japanese don't like cheese when your toddler proves that it's super easy to develop a taste for cheese.
  • Seagulls eating rats now that humans are out of the way.
  • Whether or not the Ballz Directors Cut for 3DO OST is homophobic.
  • Analyzing the music theory behind the Ballz Directors Cut for 3DO OST.
  • Getting a band together and playing a song you all remember poorly and that's it, that's the album.
  • Having heard 20 seconds of a comedy song and not needing to listen to the remaining five minutes.
  • Trying to make fun of a clown.
  • Writing questions that generate techno samples in response.
  • All protocol and format technology decisions being made by 14 year olds.
  • Whether or not Chanson is a portmanteau of Chiptune Hanson.
  • The difference between Afrobeat and Afrobeats.
  • Not adding Shoegaze to Winamp until 2010.
  • A pre-Wikipedia attempt to invent the Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy.
  • Making your web that is a sequel to your previous web site, so you give it the same name but add a 2.
  • Wikipedia except that instead of an editorial voice it has a poem about a pomegranate.
  • The most popular chord progressions staying about the same for the past 20 years.
  • Sliding an open chord up the neck and leaving the open strings where they are.
  • There probably being a music theory name for the musical trick you like to do.
  • Counting in binary while meditating because if you just count in decimal you'll lose track when you think of something else.
  • A classic web app where you submit a form and the server generates the HTML you will see in response.
  • Accidentally lording it over someone.
  • Having a fake thing you fool yourself into believing is important so you can procrastinate doing it and get the real work done.
  • How to abbreviate Murder Hornet Keeper into a demo scene handle.
  • Learning German from Wolfenstein 3D.
Support Topic Lords