172. Don't Apply Any Torque To This Bag
February 6th, 2023
1 hr 16 mins 40 secs
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Lords:
- Alex
- Shannon
Topics:
- Incomprehensible PSAs (Remember to slip, slop, slap, seek and slide)
- Games which use player ignorance as a major mechanic (Outer Wilds, Tunic)
- Man out of Space Easiest
- Stepped on a plum (overripe plum) (barefoot)
- Australia trends (pre vs post pay, pay at pump vs parking meter vs toll camera)
- Bats! Micro & Mega
Microtopics:
- The Broken Earth Trilogy.
- The Lightly-Massaged Earth Trilogy.
- Turkish Delight vs. a Turkish Delight candy bar.
- A candy that gives you the feeling of nostalgia but no corresponding memories.
- Remembering to slip, slop, slap, seek and slide in the kitchen.
- The three onomatopoeias for applying sunscreen.
- Lamenting to your partner that you forgot to slip.
- Posters that just say "don't forget to slip slop slap seek and slide" with no further context.
- A cool grandpa following safety instructions.
- Actionable snake advice.
- Various ways to distinguish goats and sheep.
- A music video that is also a drunk driving PSA.
- How to use search atoms.
- If you're on the train, that's a shame.
- Rhyming platitudes about how social media is bad for your mental health and society as a whole.
- A music video trying to get across a safe sex message to the kids.
- Do They Even Know it's Christmas?
- Something jarring to hear on the radio.
- A desert wasteland full of crying children.
- Tunic.
- Reading the manual of the video game you just bought on the drive home.
- Evoking the idea of playing old video games.
- Jumping puzzles that cost you twenty minutes of your life if you fall.
- A Jules Verne conception of the solar system where other planets are a five minute rocket trip away.
- Learning a code and keeping it in your brain.
- The Hourglass Twins.
- Not being sure what to do so you go look at the moon.
- The kind of game where most of the fun is figuring out how to play the game.
- AAA games trying to make artistic statements about AAA games.
- Hatoful Boyfriend as a better Doki Doki Literature Club.
- A horror story about pigeons.
- An ablative heat shield on your butt.
- Manually aiming the rocket without being to look outside of your polyester bag.
- The legality of dropping a moose out of a spaceship.
- A safety mechanism that is not appealing to aerospace professionals.
- Landing an airplane on Mars and then remote-piloting Mars rovers from inside the airplane.
- The world's largest saltwater crocodile.
- Pulling the quick release flap on the crocodile's mouth.
- Don't Go To Space.
- It's the 60s, and it's a bag.
- A snorkel for when you land in the ocean and can't get out of your foam entombment capsule.
- Bringing along a shotgun in case your escape pod lands in Siberia.
- Clown First Lover Second.
- A single paragraph with 19 parenthetical phrases and no other punctuation.
- Deciding to hem your sweatpants.
- Plum Nightmare.
- Finding two extra poems inside an existing poem.
- What to expect when you read a poem.
- Whether it's illegal to drive barefoot.
- Bare feet and there's textures down here.
- The utter lack of technology at the pump.
- No-flush toilets.
- What kinds of towels they use to clean up messes in Australia.
- Public restrooms that automatically eject you if you're not done in ten minutes.
- Honeycomb candy with the same texture as instant coffee.
- Look to your left; look to your right; one of you is a bat.
- Visiting baby bats in the bat hospital.
- Bats as pollinators.
- Giving stuffed animals to baby bats.
- The pollinating and bug-eating ecosystem.
- A bat the size of a bat.
- Spectacled flying foxes.
- Bats reverse-nicheing back into mice.
- Bats becoming nocturnal to avoid their creditors.