172. Don't Apply Any Torque To This Bag


February 6th, 2023

1 hr 16 mins 40 secs

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About this Episode

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  • Alex
  • Shannon



  • The Broken Earth Trilogy.
  • The Lightly-Massaged Earth Trilogy.
  • Turkish Delight vs. a Turkish Delight candy bar.
  • A candy that gives you the feeling of nostalgia but no corresponding memories.
  • Remembering to slip, slop, slap, seek and slide in the kitchen.
  • The three onomatopoeias for applying sunscreen.
  • Lamenting to your partner that you forgot to slip.
  • Posters that just say "don't forget to slip slop slap seek and slide" with no further context.
  • A cool grandpa following safety instructions.
  • Actionable snake advice.
  • Various ways to distinguish goats and sheep.
  • A music video that is also a drunk driving PSA.
  • How to use search atoms.
  • If you're on the train, that's a shame.
  • Rhyming platitudes about how social media is bad for your mental health and society as a whole.
  • A music video trying to get across a safe sex message to the kids.
  • Do They Even Know it's Christmas?
  • Something jarring to hear on the radio.
  • A desert wasteland full of crying children.
  • Tunic.
  • Reading the manual of the video game you just bought on the drive home.
  • Evoking the idea of playing old video games.
  • Jumping puzzles that cost you twenty minutes of your life if you fall.
  • A Jules Verne conception of the solar system where other planets are a five minute rocket trip away.
  • Learning a code and keeping it in your brain.
  • The Hourglass Twins.
  • Not being sure what to do so you go look at the moon.
  • The kind of game where most of the fun is figuring out how to play the game.
  • AAA games trying to make artistic statements about AAA games.
  • Hatoful Boyfriend as a better Doki Doki Literature Club.
  • A horror story about pigeons.
  • An ablative heat shield on your butt.
  • Manually aiming the rocket without being to look outside of your polyester bag.
  • The legality of dropping a moose out of a spaceship.
  • A safety mechanism that is not appealing to aerospace professionals.
  • Landing an airplane on Mars and then remote-piloting Mars rovers from inside the airplane.
  • The world's largest saltwater crocodile.
  • Pulling the quick release flap on the crocodile's mouth.
  • Don't Go To Space.
  • It's the 60s, and it's a bag.
  • A snorkel for when you land in the ocean and can't get out of your foam entombment capsule.
  • Bringing along a shotgun in case your escape pod lands in Siberia.
  • Clown First Lover Second.
  • A single paragraph with 19 parenthetical phrases and no other punctuation.
  • Deciding to hem your sweatpants.
  • Plum Nightmare.
  • Finding two extra poems inside an existing poem.
  • What to expect when you read a poem.
  • Whether it's illegal to drive barefoot.
  • Bare feet and there's textures down here.
  • The utter lack of technology at the pump.
  • No-flush toilets.
  • What kinds of towels they use to clean up messes in Australia.
  • Public restrooms that automatically eject you if you're not done in ten minutes.
  • Honeycomb candy with the same texture as instant coffee.
  • Look to your left; look to your right; one of you is a bat.
  • Visiting baby bats in the bat hospital.
  • Bats as pollinators.
  • Giving stuffed animals to baby bats.
  • The pollinating and bug-eating ecosystem.
  • A bat the size of a bat.
  • Spectacled flying foxes.
  • Bats reverse-nicheing back into mice.
  • Bats becoming nocturnal to avoid their creditors.
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