149. Croc Nutz

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Lords:

• Erica
• David

Topics:

• A partnership between you and a tool
• Schmalhausen and Vernadsky, my own personal ARG
• Stop trying to make "a wedge is a machine" happen. It's not going to happen
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Machine
• The Poetry Teacher, by Mary Oliver
  • https://voetica.com/voetica.php?collection=2&poet=27&poem=5712
• Drinking vinegar
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Short-chain_fatty_acid

Microtopics:

• Taking an allergy pill and getting something unexpected.
• Nap skeptics.
• Non-stop napping.
• Wanting to eat nothing but spinach for two days so you go to Disney World and pay extra for all the park employees to tell you that in the happiest place on Earth we only eat spinach.
• Who gets to chew the grape next and for how long.
• Forgetting a story after you tell it, so you can tell the story back and forth forever.
• A plastic grape that dissolves in your nose.
• The least favorite thing that you bought during the pandemic.
• The collective politico-pandemical nightmare.
• A shitty partnership between you and a shitty tool.
• Ol’ Slicky.
• Tools that bring you distress.
• Whether it's legal to open carry a claymore in Texas.
• A decoration you can put on your truck just in case nobody knows what an asshole you are.
• Whether you can open-carry a dildo in Texas if the dildo is also an assault rifle.
• Gluing a penis to things you don't like and explaining that "this is a partnership between you and a tool."
• Papers that you really approve should've read fifteen years ago.
• The parallel world of the Modern Synthesis.
• Soviet biologists who were recognized in their time but have since been forgotten.
• Stalin's purge of scientists researching Mendelian genetics.
• Being evacuated to Kazakhstan and fed only wilted spinach so that you can finally write the book you've been thinking about.
• Bringing your adopted pet wolf back with you from Kazakhstan.
• Growing up after the Russian revolution in St. Petersburg.
• Delegating research by convincing the Game Detectives folks that there is a pop culture reward behind it.
• Your own personal ARG that only you care about and doesn't lead to any goal except knowing more facts.
• The point of games.
• The creativity that exists in fiction that you wish you could capture in nonfiction.
• The advantages of reality over fiction.
• Becoming disenchanted with capitalism in the 1920s.
• The Demon Haunted World.
• Escaping from Stalinist Russia into Nazi Germany.
• Cheers to a boring life.
• A slightly tilted floor.
• Electrifying the wedge so it's finally a machine.
• The xkcd comic from 15 years ago that lampooned the way Wikipedia articles used to be stereotypically bad.
• Being good at math and assuming that also means you'd be good at writing an encyclopedia.
• Whether Wildlife Ecology is a different field from Wildlife Biology.
• The shittiest source that Wikipedia will accept as a citation.
• Citing George W. Bush as a source in your peer-reviewed paper about climate change.
• All the dogs arriving at once.
• Dogs teaching students how to write thirsty happy poems.
• Dog Songs (2013)
• Deliberately putting line breaks where they seem least intentional.
• The Wedge of the Poetry World.
• Dinging the pan to proceed.
• The manufacture and use of short-chain fatty acids.
• Fixing an ulcer with vinegar.
• Fuck you, I'm drinking a shrub.
• Drinking balsamic vinegar and then rinsing with baking soda.
• Butter and vinegar, together at last.