30. Century Of The Fruitbat
May 18th, 2020
1 hr 11 mins 46 secs
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Lords:
- Chris will find you. He is working on Core Editor. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4RyUjnpyJY4
- Chris is @MrChrisLHall on Twitter and is working on https://www.adventurelab.fun/
Topics:
- 2:07 Wikipedia descriptions of fighting game stories
- 13:05 Is there a 21st century version of the thank-you note?
- The Double Disappearance of Walter Fozbek. http://bookembob.blogspot.com/2011/07/double-disappearance-of-walter-fozbek.html
- The Selective Attention Test. https://youtu.be/vJG698U2Mvo
- 26:27 I'm pretty sure I could write a book about anything
- Dolphin flip in slow motion. https://youtu.be/37C1KOSgTAk
- 32:49 Kevin asks: "Tom Nook: Robber Baron or Captain of Industry?"
- 38:37 Melodica purchased online
- 48:43 Ursula Vernon is rad
- Weird fruit gallery: https://www.deviantart.com/ursulav/gallery/7872409/weird-fruit
- 57:01 Peering in on skateboard culture from the outside
- So Deep + juggling pins. https://youtu.be/9pvzWY-lSRw
Microtopics:
- Risking sounding like a corporate shill.
- Whether or not Wikipedia is pretty great.
- Wikipedia's editorial tone when describing ridiculous stories.
- Finding a video embed in the middle of a textbook page and trying to press it.
- A book with squiggle underlines wherever the author screwed up.
- Having to come up with narrative justification for 500 one-on-one fights in a row.
- The guy you just kicked off a cliff offering you cakes because nobody should have to fight on an empty stomach.
- Your pet frog jumping on a box in your back yard marked radioactive, growing to massive size, then jumping down a huge hole that is also in your back yard for some reason.
- The Japanese version of the wacky frog tank story just being factions at war in the post apocalypse.
- Mega Man except you are a gnarly wizard instead of a robot.
- A floating Buddha named "Surprise" shooting you in the back.
- If Astro Boy were a mailman.
- Merging the wacky frog tank story and the post apocalyptic war story into a single canonical timeline in the new Switch release.
- Writing on paper made of trees with a pen and it's 2020.
- Writing a thank you note when a relative hands you a twenty dollar bill.
- Writing a jam game for every special occasion because it's more fun than writing a card.
- The correct plural of Magnum Opus.
- Returning to Lazy Land.
- The videos you like best inevitably being taken down due to copyright strikes because that's the world we live in now.
- YouTube telling you that some videos have been removed from your playlist but not telling you which.
- A digital representation of what it's like to grow old.
- Making a USB drive ark and taking two of every genre of music.
- Your Google ad profile gaining sentience and making credit card purchases behind your back but also getting a job and making your credit card payments on time.
- Going to work and nobody remembering who you are.
- Going into the office wearing a gorilla costume and eventually sending in a gorilla to do your job and it turns out the gorilla is better at your job than you are.
- Using a gorilla Snapchat filter on a gorilla to make it look like a human who's trying to look like a gorilla.
- Waking up in parallel dino world where everyone is a dinosaur and your dinosaur twin waking up in human world where everyone is a human, because you both had a mad scientist neighbor.
- Making a note of how to disguise yourself as a dinosaur because you never know when you'll end up in dinosaur world.
- Doing a face swap with your cat during the conference call so everyone is too horrified to notice the gorilla in the background.
- A pedalboard except it's Instagram filters.
- Chaining Instagram filters to create a truly epic fursona.
- Reverse college, where you get paid to forget things.
- Getting paid a dollar per paragraph about skateboard tricks.
- A varial kickflip except instead of splitting the axes of rotation between your feet, doing all the rotation with your front foot.
- Writing a book with your 18 month old and it's just the words poop, ball, bath and meow over and over and over.
- Your toddler growing up to discover axes and cops, like leaves changing colors in autumn.
- A raccoon who is very friendly and has taken a lot of your money.
- Whether Tom Nook is a slum lord.
- A dog with five fingers, an apron, and a whole lot of bells.
- Being in debt forever because your landlord keeps building you a bigger and bigger house.
- A 100% speedrun of Adobe Photoshop.
- Adding achievements, particle effects, and screenshake to Visual Studio.
- Two melodica players coincidentally bringing their instruments to the same party and locking eyes from across the room.
- Cheap, portable musical instruments you can have with you at all times and practice with at the drop of a hat.
- A tube with six holes in it.
- Penny whistles always being in D because it's one more than C.
- Wikipedia diving deep into the lore of each musical scale.
- The cute face of the otamatone being almost assuredly more entertaining than the notes you play with it.
- Penny whistles with a conical bore staying in tune better than cylindrical ones.
- The monomyth of the boy who sneaks up on a seal while she's bathing and steals her skin and she turns out to be a beautiful human woman and now she has to marry him.
- The origin of the pear-with-teeth meme.
- The Biting Pear of Salamanca.
- Whether anyone named Ursula is still alive today.
- An interesting reaction to discovering that your daughter is made of birch bark.
- A dead whale falling to the ocean floor and feeding scavengers for years.
- Spending your whole life waiting for a whale to die.
- Zombie worms growing like flowers in the lightless garden of a sunken whale corpse.
- A tiny kobold fondling an eggplant.
- Giving your wife a picture of a fruit with teeth for her birthday.
- Your skateboard being stolen twice in the same day.
- Angsty skateboarders lashing out at the world around them via sick kickflips.
- Fighting everyone around you being morally equivalent to fighting no-one.
- A nine year old girl in a tutu doing a double heelflip.
- The cost of skateboarding being measured in hospital visits, especially when you are 40 and overweight.
- Wearing an inflatable dinosaur suit and skateboarding in a bounce house for maximum safety.
- Wanting to get into skateboarding but you're scared of dying and none of your friends have trucks.
- Hacky sack looking fun but actually it's a lie built on a throne of falsehoods and pain.
- Narrowing an artefact's origin down to the Century of the Fruitbat.
- Musicians dancing while they play just to show off that they are good enough at music and dancing that they can do both at the same time.
- Being entirely out of both topics and lords.