90. That's My Glass Petard!


July 12th, 2021

1 hr 13 mins 59 secs

Your Hosts

About this Episode

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  • An entire crowd of Jennis all expressing their preferences at once.
  • Creative choices that make editing this show take even longer.
  • Feeling some topics right now.
  • Helping a seagull looter escape.
  • Just assuming that the seagull didn't pay for that bag of chips.
  • Sending a penguin to the market to buy fish.
  • The Keystone Kops of stopping this bird from having a cheese sandwich.
  • How nobody can get mad if you train your dog to steal from shops.
  • An adorable seagull stealing somebody's insulin.
  • Activating the motion-sensing doors to help a seagull steal the Hope Diamond.
  • Encountering a seagull smoking a tiny crack pipe and deciding whether to post a video on social media or send it to rehab.
  • How to monetize the rat trying to go up the down escalator.
  • When you post a viral video of a rat trying to go up the down escalator and monetize it by replying with an ad for mail order brides but don't give the rat a cut off the income.
  • Whether Americans know about Eurovision.
  • Pretending the listeners don't know what Eurovision is and really lording it over them.
  • Having to adjust for the altitude when you bake a souffle on your high horse.
  • If every state in the USA got to perform one song at the Super Bowl halftime show.
  • Mr. Lordy.
  • Soccer except it's singing.
  • Looking up what girding your loins means.
  • Stocking up on batteries in advance of when Americans find out about Eurovision.
  • Power-washed Cheetos.
  • A bag of bad corn snacks impaled on both a pike and a spike.
  • Cat Is How Much.
  • The specific ways in which Wikidiff is broken.
  • Retiring replidroids.
  • Knife Hopper with Boy Ratty and Dick Reckard.
  • An extremely composed and photogenic dumpster.
  • Getting ready for some very uncomfortable mugging.
  • Identifying wizards by their extremely shiny outfits.
  • Why is this man so big?
  • Smoke tentacles that are just trying to turn the TV on.
  • How badly the red wizard needs food.
  • Sugar Ray Charles playing guitar with one hand and holding champagne in the other.
  • A dojo with sauna vibes.
  • Dripping your dumpster water onto the hookah rip enjoyer.
  • Dave-- that's what his fans call him: Dave.
  • Dave Matthews's flying kick fizzling out because his bribe to the VFX artist wasn't big enough.
  • Scaring the fish with your pec shimmy.
  • Doing community service with the purple wizard who is now the orange wizard.
  • Your two most attitudey friends getting married and having a kid.
  • Deciding that Sonic the Hedgehog's "I'm waiting" idle animation from Sonic 1 is so central to the character that you decide you need to invent reasons for Sonic to be bored in every episode of the Sonic cartoon.
  • Looking at your old yearbook photos and realizing that your smirk is the same as Sonic the Hedgehog's.
  • Kids getting sucked into Sonic the Hedgehog's engorged monopupil younger and younger every year.
  • The helicopter but it gets you lift.
  • Mario's idle animation in Super Mario 64 where he just starts naming Italian foods.
  • Whether someone at Nintendo of America heard Charles Martinet's Mario audition tape and thought "Martinet's an Italian name, right? That means it can't be racist!"
  • The alternate reality where Charles Martinet does a cartoonish French accent to voice Nintendo's platformer mascot.
  • Getting offended on behalf of the French.
  • Whether we should give Shamus O'Leary a hard time for having a racist name.
  • Shamus O'Leary finding the video on Instagram where you did a cartoon Irish accent in his store's bathroom and being like "is that our choking poster??"
  • Hearing that Andy Dufresne makes a hole in a cell wall and assuming Shawshank Redemption is a sequel to Fantastic Voyage.
  • Writing a short story about a friendly rat who explains how Marty McFly's parents didn't recognize him.
  • Making it a life goal to transform every goof on IMDB into an "error made by character" by writing fan sequels on AO3.
  • Explaining how Marty McFly's parents didn't recognize him by pointing out that it was actually a movie the whole time.
  • The stage play of Super Mario Bros 2 where the audience just watches Mario snore for two hours while listening to jaunty ragtime.
  • A joke striking you loudly enough that it's still ringing in your head twenty years later.
  • Paris Syndrome.
  • Jerusalem Syndrome.
  • Planting a palm tree under the Eiffel Tower.
  • Adventure 500.
  • A game jam where you recreate a game you haven't played in years from memory.
  • Lou's voice just being a bad Sylvester Stallone accent.
  • Jenni probably appreciating your email unless it's a bad email.
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