299. Skin Fortress With Armed Idiot

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July 14th, 2025

1 hr 3 mins 53 secs

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robb jenni

About this Episode

Lords:

  • Jenni
  • Robb

Topics:

  • The phenomenon where multiple people respond with the same mystifying emoji
  • Lately I've engaged in pretend play with my 4 year old nephew by pretending we stole a crate of "Toxic Waste" candy and lying to the cops about it. As actual parents, is this healthy for the child?
  • It turns out you don't want to rent a Playstation
  • Hints
  • I would be happy to talk about what having an operation to get an Osia 2 bone anchored hearing aid is like.

Microtopics:

  • The Stanley Parable New Edition.
  • Cyberganked.
  • Wishing for games using the Steam wishlist system and the Steam Monkey's Paw curls.
  • CRPG blobbers.
  • 25 years of Hugo.
  • Recognizing a Windows program from 1996.
  • Back when malware pretended to be a little guy.
  • The origins of Skinfort.
  • Hapsburg Jaw.
  • Angry Cry Laughing.
  • Meta-channels and meta-meta-channels.
  • Medicinal Dock Spiders.
  • This Spider Pays Taxes.
  • The weakest Great Lake of all.
  • The good Mexican restaurant in Fond du Lac.
  • Fish pouches.
  • Whether you have to refrigerate Big League Chew.
  • Putting tuna on dry toast.
  • Four year olds who want to impress people with how sour s candy they can eat.
  • The amount of toxic waste you are allowed to feed a child.
  • Having a milkshake and being in bed by 8:30.
  • Doing improv with your four year old nephew about invoking the fifth amendment.
  • The Cocomelon video about never talking to the police.
  • I'm not sad; I'm just on a triangle.
  • French mice asking to buy your armpit cheese.
  • A kid who just plain needs to be lied to.
  • Renting a child so you can make cheese in their armpits.
  • Did Jim finally rent the Playstation?
  • Going to the place to rent a Playstation and they immediately ask for your Social Security Number.
  • It's hot inside the Playstation, and the bugs are cold.
  • Just doing the poem about Data's cat Spot every episode.
  • The warlock dominatrix Harley Quinn voice that you make everybody listen to.
  • Oh I'm sorry, I thought the ceiling was your ass.
  • Telling your friends about the guy who said he thought the ceiling was your ass and asking them what it means and they just respond with the grapes emoji.
  • Games that have both Booty and The Wizard.
  • The scrawny wizard from Zwackery.
  • Whether chewing your food is a spell.
  • Listening to Topic Lords for all the mouth sounds.
  • Constantly rehydrating this child so that he can make the whole house wet.
  • Starving zombie apocalypse survivors taking the child seats out of a car so they can turn them upside down and shake all the gummy bears out.
  • A poem with a pangram rhyme scheme.
  • Bone-anchored hearing aids.
  • Bringing a topic list to a first date.
  • Waiting until your last day of insurance and bursting into the OR like the Kool-Aid Man.
  • Your surgeon quitting the industry immediately after seeing the inside of your head.
  • Performatively pressing your hearing aid's nonfunctional volume button.
  • Your wife violating HIPAA to tell you a hilarious work story.
  • Accidentally installing Bonzi Buddy on your hearing aid.
  • Marrying an audiologist to get the best possible hearing aid.
  • Going to zoom.ca to rev up your savings.
  • Performance Acura North Mississauga.
  • Adapting Eliza into a game where you're trying to trick Smaug into giving up his hoard.
  • Making a joke about a banana slug actually bring a plantain slug.
  • It is the 90s and there is time for Rifftrax.
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