218. Darmok And Jalad Go To White Castle

Lords:

• Stevie
• Avery

Topics:

• A tour of silly medieval musical instruments
• The House of David, the baseball cult who all looked like oldtimey barbers.
• Arguing with Winston about how needing to pee works
• Avery's Non Mammalian Milk Corner
• Ode on the Mammoth Cheese Weighing over 7,000 Pounds
  • https://rpo.library.utoronto.ca/content/ode-mammoth-cheese-weighing-over-7000-pounds

Microtopics:

• Why the show works like that.
• Asking people if they understand what's going on.
• Spy software.
• Exactly the kind of game you don't want to explain.
• Someone who has a sense of humor and thinks something is funny.
• A hat you can put on your frog.
• Why frogs are so damn popular.
• The game with the magnifying glass.
• Whether the recorder is a real instrument or a crappy toy for babies.
• Just how thicc this bass recorder is
• The supercomputer that's also a couch.
• Talking to your mom on the phone for 45 minutes because she can't stop listing medieval instruments.
• Recorders that are double recorders.
• Michael Fassbender teaching his clone how to play the flute.
• Eating a pair of garden shears.
• An umbrella handle that was given growth hormones that sounds kind of like a stylophone.
• An instrument that is curved so that you can play it on horseback without bonking the horse.
• The sackbut.
• A selfie stick but for a trombone.
• Sausage bassoons.
• Unholy Rackett.
• How long how many strings look it up?
• Insufflation tubes and dudelsacks..
• Versatile, like the Pogues.
• Bears riding unicycles but not very well.
• Overblowing.
• Jim the Overblower.
• Bringing up bugles to someone who works hospice.
• How many songs you can play on a bugle.
• Not wanting to play Beatles Rock Band because you with at BevMo.
• A photo of an early 20th century cult/baseball team that looks like a modern-day metal band.
• Not being able to make it to the majors so you settle for House of Dave.
• Someone who's never played Blaseball trying to explain Blaseball.
• Amusement parks started by cults.
• A pretty good way to end a baseball league.
• Additional amusement.
• Preserving tiny railways built by a baseball cult.
• A busy man who has no time to pee.
• Peristalsis.
• Persons currently experiencing hubris.
• What happens to your knowledge when you're not actively thinking about it.
• When you can truly say you know the capital of the United States.
• Waking up needing to pee and trying to fall back to sleep so that you forget you need to pee.
• Having a dream about urinals overflowing.
• Cutting nature at its joints.
• Preparing for Topicking.
• Whether the Jejune Institute made money.
• When Sacky Meets Butty.
• Signing a contract in someone else's blood.
• Yet another non-mammalian milk.
• Jacked, yoked, ripped and swole spiders.
• Imagery that's only unsettling because you don't regularly drink spider milk.
• Vestigial web butts.
• Sympathy for the young.
• Putting on a spider silk dress and never being able to take it off.
• A communal spider butthole web.
• Blinded by the milk, wrapped up in a douche.
• The first boutique New York restaurant to serve spider milk pancakes.
• Cutting out all the parts where people say something dumb.
• Drum Pants. (It turns your pants into a drum set.)
• We have seen the a Queen of Cheese.
• The worst rhyme scheme.
• A poem that screams 5th grade.
• Why does this web site have line numbers?
• Are you a bad enough dude to save the president's cheese?
• A poetic technique that can be really cool (but not in this poem)
• Confusing this mammoth cheese with another mammoth cheese.
• The most mammalian of all mammals.
• My Mother Milked a Million Mostly Male Mammoths.
• A huge ice cream tub carried by four ponies.
• 35 tons of milk
• Extremely fake beards.
• A thing people once said to sell chicken.