58. Sparkles On Top Of The Brain

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Lords:

• Elena is on the Topic Lords discord
• Tyriq is FourbitFriday everywhere
  • https://www.ckgame.net/

Topics:

• What's the youngest age at which you can become the kind of old person you want to be
• Reborrowings: https://starkeycomics.com/2020/06/06/reborrowings/
  • https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/624028907162566657/724080214128197672/etymologies-_1.png
  • https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%D1%81%D0%BB%D0%B0%D0%B2%D0%B0"
• I made pork katsu for dinner and Winston pronounced it "pork costume" and I'm pretty sure that's it, that's peak dad experience and it's all downhill from here
• Stephen asks "Textual dialects. Range of timbre and tools available in punctuation, capitalization, emphasis and emojis. Apparently periods come off as assertive/rude to younger folks."
• The tone deafness test
  • https://www.themusiclab.org/quizzes/td

Microtopics:

• Whether complice is the opposite of accomplice.
• Intending to clean the fridge.
• A short but sweet plug that you manage to drag out of your guest.
• Thinking an early access game is dead when the developer is right there in your kitchen streaming making breakfast.
• Feeling too young to just go around handing out Werther's Originals.
• Whether at some age all your teeth fall out or whether they just decided once, in the 1950s maybe, that it's time to pull everyone's teeth.
• Whether the lady with twenty cats accrued the cats over the course of your life or just adopted twenty cats at once.
• Learning to regrow your teeth so you can change your teeth style every few months, like you can your hair.
• Transhuman augmentation of the teeth.
• Being sure that a pop culture concept doesn't exist in Japan because you didn't see it in that one Yakuza game you played.
• Sharpening your teeth to look like a cat.
• The world record for most permanent transformations to look like an animal.
• Whether dead people can still be the fastest person in the world.
• The world record for most permanent transformations to look like something other than an animal.
• How Stalking Cat decided to become a cat.
• Wanting to be more like a tiger and having your ears transplanted to the top of your head.
• Getting a job as a programmer to fund your body modification plans so you can be the old person you dream about being.
• Running plastic tubes from the fake ears on top of your head down to the place your ears used to be.
• The major themes of Stalking Cat's LiveJournal.
• Seeing someone's LiveJournal post saying just "I start shooting today" and wondering if you should be worried.
• Getting back to being old.
• Cultivating the witchy vibe when you're not really a witch.
• Not having any enormous flowing skirts any more because you moved across the country and they all caught the wind and flew out of the back of the car.
• Making a skirt out of chainmail and refusing to twirl it because a four year old lives in your house.
• Asking the manufacturer of your favorite towel whether they make bathrobes and they send back a one word email saying "no."
• Wanting to look like a dapper old man but hating fashion norms.
• Appropriating the parts of fashion that you like while subverting the idea that you're participating in the fashion hierarchy.
• Wanting to eventually look like a dapper old man and starting by buying one dapper sock.
• Codpieces.
• Wearing full plate armor to church or to court.
• Stalking Cat's profile page on wikifur.com
• The Romans enslaving so many Slavs that Slav becomes their word for it.
• All the different times that nature has evolved a tree.
• Palm trees not really being trees and just being weird grass.
• A plant deciding to get tall where the sun is and reinventing wood.
• Languages borrowing words from other languages and then giving them back after completely changing the meaning.
• Whether Italy has any Pizza Huts.
• Trying to cover a song by a singer with a weird accent and discovering that you need that weird accent for the song to work and deciding if you're willing to adopt the weird accent for your cover.
• English poetry that is too old.
• A two year old pronouncing pork katsu as "pork costume."
• Dressing your two year old in pork for Halloween like the tiny ham he is.
• Really giving somebody the pork costume.
• Realizing your best work is behind you when you haven't done anything notable.
• An entirely sideways mouth that has fallen off your face.
• Chekov's Book.
• A throne but you can poop in it.
• Hiding a piece of matzo somewhere in your house on Passover and eventually your house fills up with matzo.
• Yelling at your coworker for only using the "slight smile" emoji because they weren't happy enough.
• Image searching for the Unicode character "slight smile" and seeing a field of smiley faces that are just the classic yellow smiley, but then there's one that's this smirking douchebag.
• How autocorrect ought to be able to code switch based on who you're talking to and what you're talking about.
• Walking around the house and discovering that you can't use the word "okay" in the kitchen.
• Putting the sparkles on top of the brain.
• Trying to talk about bringing your head below something and autocorrect is like "did you mean: fucking"
• Youtube's automatic captioning now censoring swear words.
• Censoring swear words by replacing the word "shit" with a picture of shit.
• Whether the eggplant emoji would ejaculate from the stem end or the bulb end.
• Squeezing mayonnaise out of the stem end of an eggplant emoji squeeze bottle.
• The tone deaf and the tone hearing.
• Being surprised to meet people who can't sing at all, even though you just met someone like that a couple days ago.
• Hearing a pitch and having no idea whether it's higher or lower than what you're singing.
• Not letting anyone into your painting club who can't distinguish red and green.
• Greyie Pie.
• Applying a deuteranopic filter to a My Little Pony episode and instantly being incredibly depressed.
• Not knowing the right answer but the person in your head heckling you does.