343. Put on Your Donut Ordering Face

Lords:

• Jenni
• Chris

Topics:

• Having to relearn how to autism mask for parenting situations because the rules are different APPARENTLY
• Only after five years learning to how make an irrigation system for a thousand plants, do I finally truly understand Han Solo's struggles with the Millenium Falcon.
• The D&D conspiracy theory I saw a few days ago and can't find now
• Don't Ever Kill the Buddha, by adzolotl
  • https://irrealisms.tumblr.com/post/677079389150887936/dont-ever-kill-the-buddha

Microtopics:

• Kitchen Bitchin'
• Forgetting about plugs because there's a small child.
• Out of Taskmaster again.
• A tiny, very opinionated man.
• Only understanding about seven concepts but having strong opinions about all of them.
• Plugging PicoSteveMo again.
• The Longing is Real Time.
• Being in charge of all the Jaunt capsules for a few minutes before you fuck someone's life up.
• What Stephen King would say if he heard about PicoSteveMo.
• PicoSteveMo: it's a good time.
• People at the bank thinking you're normal.
• Ordering whatever donuts make sense.
• Whether autistic people can order donuts.
• Putting on your donut ordering face and instructing your toddler to do whatever makes sense.
• Enjoying activating objects. Loving to access their functions.
• A wonderful world where everything is interactive, especially dog tails.
• What is a dog's tail for if not grabbing??
• Better child-rearing outcomes associated with having heard more words.
• Keeping a running commentary going while you put pants on your toddler.
• Successfully interrupting your toddler before they disassemble anyone's grocery order.
• Drug dealers in the parking lot who love when your toddler tries to catch a bird.
• Yes! Yes, it's you! Feel shame!
• Learning how to make small talk so you can get a job at Spencer's Gifts.
• Whether you're autistic or if it's some other weird trauma instead.
• Dad at Swim Class.
• The kind of dads they have in Bakersfield.
• Trying to find O.G. Dad in the Dad Soup.
• Patriogenesis.
• Fixing the water pressure on one end of the line which breaks all the janky connectors on the other end of the line.
• The Big Chungus Alarm that you installed five years ago when you were working with the Big Chungus system.
• Robots tearing themselves apart in ways you don't understand vs. in ways you do.
• People who have worked on complicated systems.
• Trying something new and suddenly you're dumb again.
• The Millennium Falcon as a jalopy from American Graffiti.
• Twenty extremely cool-dressed Asian kids in their twenties with souped up cars there's a racist term for that I legitimately don't remember, I'm not just trying to avoid saying it.
• Somebody flipping their car in front of your house while the baby is trying to nap.
• Self depreciation in the South Bay pan-Asian community.
• Keeping nitrous oxide balloons in the back of your sports car and popping one into the Mr. Balloon when you need a speed boost.
• Kids making too many U-turns in the 1950s and the No U-Turn signs are still making it hard to get their you're going to this day.
• Things everyone knows about Walter White.
• Black Walnut Trees extruding Juggalos, killing everyone in the vicinity.
• A biome map that looks like when you take Minecraft and turn the biome setting to "really small"
• The D&D conspiracy theory that you saw on Tumblr but can't find any more.
• Being outed as someone who still thinks in terms of THACO.
• Running a Shadowdark campaign and making delighted noises the entire time.
• D&D characters leveling up too much and wanting to run a business.
• What purpose dice serve in a TTRPG.
• Rolling two natural ones in a row and cutting your own head off.
• Orcs running ice-cream shops.
• Having a hypomanic episode about not being allowed to be an elf with chainmail.
• Having the Red Box and also the four subsequent boxes of different colors.
• Picking up a gold piece and putting it back down over and over because finding a gold piece is worth 1 XP.
• Reading a lot of things that rhyme.
• Reading Dr. Seuss like Ulysses.
• Playing pranks on people who reincarnate.
• When one set of footprints disappeared it's when you married the Buddha and he carried you over the threshold.
• Everyone trying to understand the "kill the Buddha" koan when it's just that the guy really hated the Buddha.