• Tyriq
• Watson

Topics:

• My sleep experience over the holiday
  • Esper says: "Cannabis can definitely help one get into a sleep state, but actually degrades the quality of sleep quite a bit. From personal experience my guess is this has to do with how it affects dreams, often precluding them from happening to begin with."
• Conlanging taught me how to judge good art
• Tate mode
• The Tyger, by William Blake
  • https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/43687/the-tyger

Microtopics:

• Scrubbin' Trubble
• The Lathe of Heaven by Ursula K. Leguin.
• Changing history by dreaming about it and having a hypnotherapist that's trying to change your dreams.
• Telling artists that you like them vs. telling them that you like your work.
• Learning how to take compliments.
• Three people who could have opinions.
• Spoilers for early January.
• Trying to sleep on an airplane and training yourself to be unable to sleep at all.
• A highly suboptimal experience.
• Untraining the fear of falling asleep on planes from your body.
• How to wear a neck pillow, maybe.
• Sleeping sitting up and your head nodding forward as you fall asleep.
• Neck pillow instructions dot PDF.
• How to transport a neck pillow.
• Hyperfixation on sleep and the consequences of not getting it.
• Mythbusters Mode.
• If you can't sleep, how helpful is it to pretend to be asleep?
• Being woken up by the sensation of all your senses shutting down as you fall asleep.
• Skipping your consciousness off of the surface of sleep.
• Getting super stoked when you're about to fall asleep and waking yourself up because you're so excited.
• Problems solved with more coffee vs. problems solved with more coffee tables.
• Lingthusiasm.
• Cursing yourself to hate a beloved movie series by watching it on a plane.
• Psychosomatic self-curses.
• Linguistics and conlangs.
• The guy everyone hires to con a lang for a movie.
• Judging things based on whether you like it vs. judging things based on whether it achieved the creator's goals.
• Learning a new framing and applying it to everything.
• Being aware of your frame and communicating your frame to the listener.
• Lojban.
• Lojban as a wholly unnatural way to speak in the same way that ballet is a wholly unnatural way to move.
• Decent and not unaesthetic.
• Trying to draw a picture without knowing how to hold a pencil.
• Birds with extra vocal tracts.
• Birdlangs.
• What if parrots evolved to be sentient, except in a fantasy world, because reasons.
• Ascertaining the borders of your caring.
• Brandon Sanderson doing Brandon Sanderson things.
• The IPA of sounds a human can perform live on a modular synthesizer.
• To create Hatsune Miku, you must first invent the universe.
• Horizontal vs. vertical scanlines.
• Designing a CRT that can scan either horizontally or vertically.
• Delta gun tubes with a triad of phosphor dots.
• Having a vertical monitor to display tall things.
• Page-shaped-pages.
• Games that ship as a rectangle on a web site.
• Black frame insertion.
• Do modern LCD displays have ghosting?
• A very intimidating challenge.
• A very fun nexus of art and programming.
• Tate Mode vs. Tate Modern.
• Tate your owl for science.
• Whether this poem predates the Great Vowel Shift.
• Mixing ands and ampersands.
• Capital Ampersand.
• Seeing an animal and realizing that this is it, this is the one that's meant to eat me.
• A glowing golden perfect human that everyone instantly hates and wants to eat.
• Whether you can invent a tiger in Dwarf Fortress.

Support Topic Lords

• Jenni
• Tyriq

Topics:

• Internal Monologue Soundboards
• Ash wants to be the very best, but at what cost? When is competition a bad thing?
• The different ways people play games
• Friendship is a skill
• Water… Earth… Fire… Air… which bending is best bending?

Microtopics:

• Scrubbin' Trouble.
• Figuring out how to do a multiplayer roguelike.
• Power leveling all your skills at once and hoping it's enough.
• Looking at the comments, because there might be something good in there.
• The Dawn of Our Topic Lords Century.
• Why all ducks sound like that.
• Hearing a sound an incorporating it into your internal monologue.
• Saying "good morning" whenever you pick up the phone no matter what time of day it is.
• Alone in the Dark Hedge Maze Mafioso Barks.
• Talkin' Barks.
• A vault full of clones of a guy named Gary and the only thing they can say is "Gary"
• You're a cluster of cells wafting through the universe and latching onto phrases you hear on the internet.
• Kids who think they invented being dumb on the Internet.
• The Bill Nye theme song sound board.
• Wanting to be the very best, like noone ever was, and defining "best" as "kindest."
• Wanting to be the very best, and then being it, and then no longer being it and losing your entire sense of identity.
• What if you're on a spaceship? Lots of weird things happen on a spaceship.
• Striving to be the most benevolent god, like noone ever was.
• The sound of angering the giant goose.
• Trying to get your significant other to play Outer Wilds because you can't fly the spaceship.
• Solving puzzles with the internet.
• Super Metroid + Link to the Past and other multi-game randomizers.
• Lies on video game forums.
• The Search for the Last Great Secret.
• A Clop or a Girp.
• Collecting meat for a Roguelike Celebration talk.
• Holding a meeting about all the ways your project could potentially fail.
• Good mortem!
• Going back in time and all humans clump together like a giant Katamari.
• Friendship as a skill vs. friendship as a natural outcome of your life circumstances.
• Friendship decay, a a problem that neurotypicals have.
• Keeping up with real life friends vs. with Internet friends.
• Online games as a third place.
• Complaining about all the ways in which your are socially incompetent.
• Inviting people over for a listening party.
• Not knowing what number you're thinking of but knowing that it's either odd or even.
• Filling away tidbits of information.
• The Y2K problem where when pro people start being over 127 years old, everyone remembers them as being -128.
• Things that are impossible to think about because you have no frame of reference.
• Making yourself a little coffee treat and scrolling reddit so you can stop thinking about death.
• Water is imba!
• Whether magma falls under bending Earth or bending Fire.
• Highly fluid particulate sand.
• Which bending is most delicious, according to avatarfandom.com
• The cosmology of Jefferson Starship's "We Built This City"
• Whether circuit bending is still fun now that everything is software-controlled.
• Circuit bending your electric together.
• The Goodbye Noise.
• Odd Object dot Zone.
• Hamster Disco.

Support Topic Lords

• John
• Tyriq
  • https://oddobject.zone/

Topics:

• "Is it harder with twins than with one?" "I wouldn't know."
• Would it be neat or terrible to live on a supercontinent
• That X-Files episode when Scully scanned an alien artifact in a grocery store's bar code reader
• When I Am Among The Trees by Mary Oliver
  • https://cih.ucsd.edu/sites/cih.ucsd.edu/files/cfm/When%20I%20am%20among%20the%20Trees%20by%20Mary%20Oliver.pdf
• Dippin' Dots except each dot is a tiny burger

Microtopics:

• Pouring a glass of water and leaving it for your future self to discover later.
• What Jim used his mailing list for before Mail Chimp shut in down.
• Discussion things. (Not topics.)
• Trying to do a bit and the person you're doing s bit to does a bit back and now you're doing two bits.
• Raising a couple of outliers.
• Children who have learned how to run but have not yet learned not to run into the street.
• You're already making dinner for one twin, why not feed the other one too?
• Raising a child with your tired adult body.
• Is it bad for twins to always be together?
• A/B testing your twins.
• Getting Minecraft pajamas for the kid who keep talking about Minecraft.
• It's like Legos but there are monsters.
• Running Doom in Minecraft redstone at four hours per frame.
• The continents being spread out like s badly peeled orange.
• Flying around in the Aluminium Falcon.
• Pangaea vs. Panthalassa.
• A small bird that digs into your bag and eats your food and it's not afraid of you because it has no predators.
• Wooly Rhinoceroses, Land Sharks, and
• A little guy in a world that's too big for him.
• Playing Counterstrike and always picking the map where you are a mouse in a gigantic kitchen and all your friends hate it
• The katamari getting bigger but the prince stays the same size.
• Finishing your book about mice knights before you realize you're writing a children's series.
• The breadth of fiction about sapient rodents.
• Inner-Continental Gigantism.
• Finding a reason to offscreen your lead actress.
• Why Scully uses a different text editor to write her reports in every episode.
• What does Scully do with the dog she adopted?
• What happened to alien abductions?
• A very powerful spice and making an entire meal out of just the spice.
• The Lone Gunmen. (Cancelled after half a season.)
• Watching unaired Lone Gunmen pilot for Casey's Star Trek podcast
• Short subject lords.
• Equally the beach, the oaks and the pines.
• To go easy, to be filled with light.
• How much five dollar words cost now, adjusted for inflation.
• Becoming a nature person over time.
• Whether dollars existed in the 1580s.
• Measuring the value of a word by multiplying chips by mult.
• Hoping to one day look back on your experiences playing Balatro.
• A thousand burgers each the size of a grain of quinoa.
• Whether it's possible to make hamburger buns smaller.
• They're just tiny burgers, so why don't you call them that?
• Maximizing your burger's surface area because you taste the surface, not the middle.
• You can't taste the middle of a burger!
• A plate full of Dippin' Dots burgers.
• Eating rice, but each grain takes like a burger.
• A bed of the finest chopped onions.
• Making a rectangle of steamed hamburger and chopping them up in a grid.
• Extruding tiny finished hamburgers out of the pasta machine.
• Odd Object dot Zone.
• The Garages' final final album.

Support Topic Lords

• Tyriq
• Stevie
• Avery

Topics:

• What is Dr. Mario's specialty?
• Boutique sardines
• Street Sharks (and the lies about them)
• PiCoSteveMo is over! (as of this recording)

Microtopics:

• Throwing out an idea like a plate of spaghetti, or a grenade.
• Odd Object.
• Piggy-back dual plugs.
• Now! That's What I Call Avery Burke, Vol. VII.
• Jason Shiga.
• Older kids who are into roughhousing and watching shark movies.
• Audio Issues Because of Dog.
• The only place on the Internet you can hear cardboard boxes rubbing against each other.
• Two hours of an attractive woman scraping her thumbnail on a microphone.
• Dr. Mario telling someone that they only have-a four months to live-a.
• The weird forehead mirror that old-timey doctors wear.
• The opinions of someone who's eaten cat food.
• Grandma barging in while you're eating dog food.
• Flintstones Cannibalism Vitamins.
• Barney's PTSD after the Neanderthal Wars.
• Wacky Races, the original MCU.
• Dr. Mario's pill pusherside hustle causing the opioid crisis.
• Ego Death Mario microdosing the germs in the pill bottle who transcend to the great pill bottle in the sky.
• Coming up with the conceit that your band is enemies with sea mammals and making all future audiences hate you.
• Three adorable sardines rowing a boat shaped like a dragon.
• An octopus tentacle that looks like a serial port or a 2x6 spot light.
• The animal that you're eating depicted in cartoon form as cheering you on.
• An anthropomorphic ginger root eating a ginger candy.
• Single-serving black characters.
• Eating a fish and finding an entire spine.
• The weirdest bone to find.
• Free floating animals gathering into a colony and turning into a face.
• The most popular fish sauce in ancient Rome.
• Sealing a whale hand in a trash can with duct tape for two years until it starts leaking and your roommate has to help you dispose of it wearing a hazmat suit.
• Tucking a whale bone under your trench coat and sneaking out of the museum.
• Famous whale disposal techniqus.
• Fishwife, fish life!
• Not knowing about the preexisting work that your favorite cartoon is in conversation with because you're a kid and don't know anything.
• Slammu, Ripster and Streex.
• Michelangelo, Leonardo, DiCaprio, and Don Angelo.
• Vin Diesel being very excited about the Street Sharks.
• IP Homeopathy.
• Sexy Mummy Costume.
• Using mumnies as train fuel because they are so plentiful.
• You can't get Mummy Brown any more because of Woke.
• Who has and hasn't heard of Tommy Tallarico.
• A toy that lets you shoot at the TV screen during the interactive parts of Captain Power.
• Fresh off the PiCoSteveMo boat.
• Graph going up emoji.
• Lots of different skill levels going on in there.
• Aardvarks and anteaters.
• A three hour celebration of weird things that games can be.
• Look Who's The Shining Two!
• Why the Sokoban puzzle in Ocarina of Time sucks.
• Puzzles vs. situations.
• Tony and the Tony Mechanic.
• The Thought Leader of the Thinky Games Community.

Support Topic Lords

• Tyriq
• Alex

Topics:

• Trying to superficially familiarize myself with every country
• The log burner fan
  • https://ae01.alicdn.com/kf/S68d58689db54401f9a434456881cbdfcf/4-Blade-Heat-Powered-Stove-Fan-Log-Wood-Burner-Eco-Friendly-Quiet-Fireplace-Fan-WinterWarm.jpg
• Drilling this chair for ancient water
• Variations on a Theme by William Carlos Williams, by Kenneth Koch
  • https://allpoetry.com/Variations-On-A-Theme-By-William-Carlos-Williams
• Boichik bagels
• Boxfish skeletons are wilder than seahorse skeletons

Microtopics:

• Saya Gray.
• Least-favorite UFO 50 games.
• Treating the city you live in as if you're a tourist.
• Going to obscure corners of parking lots.
• A way to have an adventure in real life.
• The tiny squishy seal that's no longer in your back pocket.
• Web sites that are nothing but quizzes.
• Trying to name every country.
• This Sporcle quiz's opinion about which disputed territories count as countries.
• Feeling more worldly after you memorize the names of every country.
• Learning katakana and then being annoyed when signs do katakana wrong.
• The curse of perfect-pitch.
• Corrupted Pitch.
• Tuning your whole band to the same out of tune guitar.
• Hearing sounds in your head but only the sounds you're also hearing with your ears.
• State.gov hosting PDF reports of the US government's opinion of every country.
• Dear diary, today I did a cool fishing trade with Norway.
• The Four Guineas.
• The Place Across the Woods.
• A giant CPU heat sink in gunmetal black sitting on top of your wood burning stove.
• Devices powered by ambient temperature differentials.
• The spinning thing on the roof that looks like a macaroon.
• Putting googly eyes on your turbine roof vents.
• Whether Stirling Engines are useful for anything other than a demonstration of the principles of the Stirling Engine.
• Fluids moving through spaces of different sizes.
• Injection molded hollow chunky boys.
• Extremely mundane time capsules.
• A Chair for Scientists.
• A giant plastic-encased garbage ravioli.
• Entire ecosystems that have existed without light for thousands of years.
• Your FEMA-approved disaster preparedness chair.
• Sorting all the water molecules on earth from newest to oldest.
• Artists' depictions of the Hadean Earth.
• The biggest wettest comet in the universe.
• Don Quixote, the sopping wet comet.
• Free sharps, only used once!
• Writing a piece for prepared guitar after your kid fills the guitar with crayons.
• Unprepared Pianos.
• Juicy cold March wind.
• A fair-use parody.
• AI analysis of poetry that completely misses the point.
• Editing Wikipedia to say that Lil Jon went to Harvard.
• List of Rivers in Togo.
• What a Specific Guy!
• Registering an account to vandalize Wikipedia every few months for years.
• Supermarket bagels.
• Boiling round bread in water with crustaceans from the Bronx.
• Making your own water to make coffee with.
• Where to get food-grade lye.
• Pastrami lox.
• Seahorse skeletons.
• Every Platonic Solid Has a Fish.
• Where babies breathe from.
• Fish without ribcages.
• Caltrops arranged into a fish.
• Using a pufferfish skeleton as a fidget toy.
• The pufferfish at the center of our solar system.
• The kind of decoration you see in a lobster joint.
• Tropes of the open ocean.
• The guy preventing you from being able to find search results for the Atari game Toobin'.
• The loudest drinks in the world.
• The Toobin' zone in LEGO Dimensions.
• Chucking whole unopened cans of beer from your inner tube.

Support Topic Lords

• Elena
  • Esper says: "I will join both guests in also recommending Dropout, especially Game Changer. They are on to something really special with the shows they're making, very little makes me laugh as hard as the stuff on there."
• Tyriq
  • https://50games.fun/

Topics:

• Being witty and social is my favorite power fantasy to realize
• Popular music: sometimes popular because it's good?
• Where do we go after Cohost
• Ballad of the Veliger
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walter_Garstang?useskin=vector#The_Ballad_of_the_Veliger

Microtopics:

• Japanese cold medicine.
• Promising the guy at the drug store you haven't taken this drug on the last week.
• Lulu Attack X.
• What the College Humor folks went on to do after graduating.
• 50 games for a fictional console.
• UFO 500.
• Super Mario Bros but it scrolls wrong.
• Google docs autocorrecting your Steam keys.
• Some weird shit that you're going to maybe discover.
• Why he's named Gordy.
• Being sharp and on it all the time in a conversational manner.
• The safety of a fantasy that is unrealistic to fulfill in real life.
• Picking a joke and connecting it to the prompt.
• Making a speech check and the DM thinks of a clever thing for you to say.
• Coming across as socially competent in a conversation and feeling great for the rest of the day.
• Looking at an extremely charismatic, competent character in a film and thinking "that's me! That's me in there!"
• People talking to you about Chappell Roan.
• Japanese translated cover of Good Luck Babe.
• Hearing a lot about an artist and thinking "this artist has a lot of attention and they don't need mine"
• The combination of a man, a woman, and bunch of instruments.
• Where people who like pop music hear new music.
• Pop music: not as popular as it used to be.
• The pros and cons of people enjoying a wider variety of pop culture.
• Fingerprints in the Clay.
• Having to make synthesizer music in prison because they won't let you have guitars.
• Not paying attention to the political context of the unintelligible screaming in your favorite album.
• Ancestors of the guitar that sound a little bit different from the guitar.
• People being unable to tell what amateurish synthesizer work sounds like.
• Instruments producing incidental noises that come alongside the sounds you intend to make, just by their nature as a physical object.
• Pink Pony Club, a song about dancing at a club.
• Authenticity vs. perceived authenticity.
• Trying to stay on top of fashion trends.
• Making noises because you feel compelled to.
• Finding one way or another to pay off the Capitalism demons.
• Having the genetic disposition to practice a lot.
• Seeking out things that are easy for you personally to become good at.
• Drawing because you are holding a pencil all the time and need to fidget, and stopping drawing forever when you are no longer in that life situation.
• Singing to yourself on the bus.
• An instrument that's just the screechy tube part of the bagpipes.
• A monotonic screech machine.
• Joining your church choir and knowing you're better than everybody else there.
• Doing a really good job and being relieved that nobody noticed.
• What does 12 year old Jim know? Certainly not where he's been for the past six months.
• Making a space for humans on the internet.
• Tumblr wins by doing absolutely nothing.
• The kind of person who is like "follow me onto this social media site I've just heard of right now"
• Artist Alley.
• The moral difference between "liking" and "reposting."
• The "reposting something without liking it" vs. "liking it without reposting it" truth table.
• A British citizen from the 19th century with a name that looks German.
• How the gastropod got its twist.
• Horny Foot Without.
• A poem that is just literally what it says on the tin.
• A little baby sea guy.
• A sonnet about the anatomy of the eyeball.
• What marine biology nerds got up to in 1928.
• Larval Forms and Other Zoological Verses.
• Red Seas Under Red Skies.
• Lamarckian evolution.
• Snails are great. (Except for the cone snail.)
• I'm on a sea slug diet.
• The class of pet that you never touch or interact with in any way.
• How to interact with fish.
• Whether koi care that you're petting them.
• Interacting with fish by having them clean your teeth.
• Enticing your pet octopus to do the dishes by covering them with fish paste.

Support Topic Lords

• Jenni
• Tyriq

Topics:

• That mayochup and kranch
• Barry Topping
• Magic Shell
• Hot Sauce by Just James
  • https://www.poetrysoup.com/poem/hot_sauce_889972
• Video games where you put toppings on things
• The temptation of bad ice cream toppings

Microtopics:

• The game where you go into your uncle's nipple and find a tiny heart.
• Isles of Sea and Sky.
• A block pushy game.
• Toppings that are just recombinations of existing toppings.
• Switching sriracha brands for labor relations reasons.
• Combining all the soda flavors because you're an iconoclast and suffering because the flavor is worse but it's worth it.
• Getting a squeeze bottle so you can drizzle sauces like on TV.
• Getting pre-ruined peanut butters so you don't need to worry about ruining it any further.
• Buying peanut butter because you no longer live with someone who is allergic to nuts.
• Intrusive and non-intrusive seeds.
• Condiment combinations sticking in your head for decades.
• Ketchup and something that's kind of like a thing you might know but might not.
• Almost Pickles: It's Just Cucumbers.
• Harmless Coconut Water.
• Cranch: ranch dressing that that comes out of the can in a wobbly cylinder like cranberry sauce.
• Barry Hilary Valentine Topping.
• Paradise Killer.
• Walking into court sipping your Starbucks latte.
• Hopping around a beach and looking at a vaporwave pyramid.
• Collecting skate tapes, just like Mario does.
• Bails hurt scores, Mario!
• Street Uni X.
• The Tony Hawk soundtrack except slightly more a Lilith Fair.
• Enjoying a bad N64 camera enough for the two of us.
• The thing you squirt onto your ice cream.
• Making your own counterfeit Kranch at home in a bottle with Kranch written on it in crayon.
• The Cheese Remains Saucy.
• Getting a boba tea for $17 outside of LA.
• Taking the very worst bite out of your mother in law's ice cream cone.
• Working out your jaw muscles until you can eat the entire ice cream cone in one bite.
• Eating 16 pints of ice cream in six minutes.
• Screaming at ice cream until it teleports into your belly.
• Admonishing your readers that hot sauce would not make a good wife.
• Stealing the pelt of a selkie but she always wants to go back to the ocean.
• Selkie for a wife vs. ice cream for a wife.
• ASMRtistry.
• Spices of life.
• Using a food metaphor to describe the metaphorical nature to food.
• Three pop songs that compare women to food.
• A topic that is floating around in the the collective unconscious.
• Sriracha sorbet.
• A flight of tea-flavored ice creams.
• Sentient hot sauce putting itself on things you don't usually put hot sauce on.
• Salamander County Public Television.
• A Wario Ware that's a little bit QWOP.
• The Pancake/Burger/Bacon trilogy.
• An interactive thing where you put food into space.
• The American Portion Gun.
• Put things on things.
• Video games with hamburger building elements.
• A fast food simulator where you solve all the horror game problems that you're in.
• Whether board games count as video games since you can see them.
• Vidus Gamus.
• Livin' la Video Game Loca.
• Learning how to recover from mistakes.
• Putting an entire Snickers bar in your cup of Sriracha and the clerk just shakes his head.
• Asking the froyo guy to arrange the gummy worms "artfully. Like how I would if I could reach in there nyself. In fact why do I need to order, just give me the froyo that I want!"
• All the Mistake Blizzards you can eat.
• Nerds Butterfinger Mistake Blizzard.
• Putting barbecue sauce on vanilla ice cream because you're out or chocolate sauce.
• What's your favorite cheese to put on Pop-Tarts?
• The Ambies for Excellence in Audio.
• How to make more of the red liquid they found in the black sarcophagus.

Support Topic Lords

• Andrew
• Tyriq

Lords:

• The Church of the SubGenius
• Making FreeCell is kind of like playing FreeCell
• How do we get to a place where our primary tool for productivity is not also our primary avenue of distraction?
• "<3 Team Schiff", by Team Schiff
  • https://files.fireside.fm/file/fireside-uploads/images/3/3597ddeb-e52e-4cda-a59c-c64600489fea/kNKMVgFF.png

Microtopics:

• World Building Notes
• An accent you cannot discern the origin of.
• Fun worlds that I've thought of.
• A world where hair is the source of all life.
• A port of Freecell to the Playdate that might never be released.
• J.R. Bob Dobbs, a salesman from the 1950s.
• Whether Discord (the IRC client) is named after Discordianism.
• Tyriq Reads Wikipedia.
• Principia Discordia.
• An extremely profitable troll.
• Good and bad reasons to troll.
• Making your weird fun art without worrying about people taking you way too seriously fifty years from now.
• Whether submarines are named after the Church of the Subgenus.
• Rewriting your entire game in C.
• Playing Freecell Validly.
• A latecomer to Freecell.
• The one known impossible Freecell seed.
• The Freecell Helleed vs. the Minesweeper Dream Board.
• The looking at the cube phase and the turning the cube phase.
• Typeshift speed run hacks.
• Knowing a 38-letter word.
• Undo trees.
• The New York Times games package being sold separately from the newspaper.
• The diction of the New York Times crossword puzzle.
• Doing Greek letter flash cards to up your crossword game.
• Words that come up a lot when you're mashing letters together.
• A job where you don't use a computer? In this economy?
• Sequencer-based techno.
• Constraints that fit the UI extremely well.
• An interface that makes a lot of sense for the Game Boy.
• Printing out the entirety of Wikipedia so you can go offline for a while.
• The compressed size of Wikipedia.
• Here's a thing and the only thing it does is have information on it.
• Hanging out in the library with people vs. with books.
• The three best things in life.
• Opening the tiny drawer and flipping through the tiny cards with your tiny hands and using your tiny eyes to read the tiny text.
• Downloading information about a spider that links to another spider.
• Using robots.txt to ward off all kinds of creatures, not just robots.
• 999: Extraterrestrial Worlds.
• Abandoning the Dewey Decimal System after you discover that numbers go higher than 999.
• Stopping to end.
• This Cat Does Not Exist.
• The perfect source of images that have never been used before.
• An art project that invents politicians and texts people imploring them to donate to the campaign and that's how the art project gets funding.
• What Socrates would have said about the Banksy that shredded itself.
• Your legal name with a bunch of letters removed.
• Picking an online handle that's very hard to pronounce to make sure people don't call you that in real life.
• Giving everybody you meet a different name for yourself.
• Having more friends than you've ever had.
• Having hobbies that put you in a room with people.
• Libraries as raucous hangouts.
• Inviting tweens to play video games in the back rooms (but not in a shady way)
• A citizen saying "hey, library, can I use a room?"
• Your local library, featuring the Middle-Aged Zone.
• Lego Security Theater.
• An unordered list of links.

Support Topic Lords

• Jeff
  • http://dopeassvideogames.com/
• Tyriq
  • https://fourbitfriday.itch.io/

Topics:

• The shame of not remembering any good jokes for kids and having to write jokes on the spot for impatient children
• What's your favorite genre to consume that you have no interest in making (or think you'd suck at?)
• High Sidin'
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5INAxH1HD7s
• Poetry
  • https://poets.org/poem/poetry
• Every mammal has a fish

Microtopics:

• Line of sight for the fog of war.
• Plugging unplugging.
• How to keep looking at TikTok when your phone is destroyed.
• Telling your kid that Youtube broke.
• Youtube videos that teach your child how to give a thumbs up.
• Having more kids because it pays for itself.
• Why did the princess have no dresses?
• Explaining to a four year old about the $20 Sack Pyramid.
• Weaning yourself off of saying /s by saying "wocka wocka" instead.
• Teaching your kids better standards for comedy.
• Snow White did this and then Belle was there and Ariel was there with her human legs.
• The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen but for making pie.
• Looking up knock knock jokes online.
• Your kid finding your secret hoard of popsicle sticks and realizing you didn't just make all those jokes up from your head.
• Things you want to have made but don't want to make
• Trying to surprise yourself with your own level design.
• Wallowing in the stuckness.
• Whether game developers know when they're making a bad game.
• Playtesting the shit out of a game because you enjoy playtesting so much.
• Questionable hip hop.
• Thrashy hyperpop.
• Full-time access to a green screen and what it does to your head.
• Comedy FMV games.
• Making a career out of making bad art except it's funny and having to live with yourself.
• Approachable game projects.
• Pivoting from making an action RPG to making a Vampire Survivors clone in the space of a weekend.
• Making a bunch of efforts and they're all terrible.
• Whispering into a distortion pedal.
• Putting your vocals through a bunch of effects pedals because your lyrics are terrible.
• Enjoying an art creation process until you get too self conscious and ruin it.
• Wallowing in the stuckness.
• Making art and never showing it to anybody.
• A twin stick shooter that's just for me.
• Game Heads.
• Onlookers getting hyphy.
• "Side Show" by 415.
• Back when Oakland was in the 415 area code.
• Turning tight ones.
• Turning brodies in an intersection while commuters look at your 15-inch subwoofers.
• Rogue car events.
• Game: the Games and Music Experience.
• A lowrider with the entirely wrong number of switches.
• Whether Boots Riley and Too Short still live in Oakland.
• Aspirational trailer music choices.
• Car Stealth: drive around a corner and hide.
• Missing Rock Band but not missing it enough to install Fortnite.
• Initiating taunts in Fortnite by strumming the guitar controller.
• The immovable critic twinkling his skin.
• Imaginary gardens with real toads in them.
• Poetry with a diss track vibe to it.
• Good going, dumbass, you got into poetry.
• Whether poetry should rhyme.
• Discriminating against business documents.
• Putting a poem on genius.com and adding a "wocka wocka" annotation after every joke.
• Spending an hour searching for animal names followed by "fish"
• Which fish have the thickest bones?
• Buffalo Fish Wings.
• A fish that is way too big and shaped like the letter D.
• Is Beyonce a Nicki Minaj friends??
• Grandma's big bowl of worsties.
• Energy drinks that make you want to disassemble a clock radio.
• Drinking C4.
• The guy you know who always has at least three Red Bulls on him at all times.
• Bringing home a one-of-a-kind Monet even though you know your roommate is a Monet fiend and will eat it immediately.
• The Master P of devouring Kit Kats.
• The Queen of Bites and Sips.
• Your duty to eat snacks before they go bad.
• Eating one marshmallow right now.
• The shitposty garbage that made Twitter fun.
• Here's some pants pooping jokes, wocka wocka.

Support Topic Lords

• Tyriq
• Jay

Topics:

• I recently moved and I think I understand Having Stuff more now.
• Teaching my 3-year-old to use a mouse and keyboard. Kids learning software being a ghost of its former self.
• Interface traps
• Yelp! Review for God by Willow James Claire
  • https://files.fireside.fm/file/fireside-uploads/images/3/3597ddeb-e52e-4cda-a59c-c64600489fea/ib998beS.jpg
• Starting a YouTube Channel for kids and the lack of useful information on the topic.

Microtopics:

• Ben and Jerry's Cookie Dough ice cream.
• Washing the ice cream off of the cookie dough ice cream and baking cookies.
• Snacking dough.
• Living on your own and owning silverware for the first time.
• Losing a fork that they don't make any more and having mismatched forks forever.
• A hodgepodge of styles.
• Different spaces each with their own internal consistency.
• Going to your ex-roommate's Halloween party as a guest for the first time.
• Parties that you can leave.
• Finding out you were right about what you thought you'd like.
• Moving house in an hour.
• Your kid banging on the keyboard to write nonsense messages in discord but he forgets to hit enter to send so you have to do it for him.
• Teaching kids to read by giving them a Kindle tablet.
• Typing "stop" fifty times in notepad.
• Dell Rugged.
• What Mavis Beacon is up to nowadays.
• Computers as the exciting future vs. computers as the boring shitty present.
• Getting a laptop without a touch screen so your kid can learn to use the mouse.
• Different ways to not understand folders.
• Whether the problem is that Gen Z doesn't know what a folder is or whether it's that they sometimes still need to know what a folder is.
• Apps that appear to be native apps but they're secretly running in a web browser.
• Coming into possession of a child.
• An overworld where you can walk in 8 directions and bump into NPCs.
• Boots Quest.
• Auto Shooting Survival.
• Roguelike Turn-Based Auto Shooting Survival.
• Mini Yoto.
• Using the insert key on purpose.
• The Jay's Wife of Scroll Lock.
• The two Smush tracks on the Hypnospace Outlaw soundtrack.
• Why there are separate shift and caps lock keys but no separate toggle insert and hold to insert keys.
• Sticky Keys.
• Caps lock keys that physically toggle.
• Toon Boom Harmony and other way too expensive subscription software.
• Can't draw can't see pencil in toon boom reddit
• Lock the taskbar, lock the taskbar.
• The pros and cons of different start menu orientations.
• Getting kissed in the vegetable aisle, so to speak.
• Talking about dungeons and dragons and getting something slightly wrong about dungeons or dragons.
• The laws of physics preventing you from kidding boys.
• On the one hand growing up as a trans poet in Arizona. On the other, drinking a whole lot of strawberry kiwi kombucha.
• Four out of five stars for inventing an extremely dry mouth.
• A dry, scratchy, sandpaper cat tongue.
• A song about a ghost eating toast.
• Watching your kid watch things.
• Where to put video content on the internet.
• Ideas that are occluded by ideas that are better search-engine optimized.
• Whether librarians are scarier in Germany.
• Combining three people with social anxiety to make one really big person with social anxiety.
• Fixing kids software for 100 people because it's too hard to fix it for the whole world.
• X for Extreme.

Support Topic Lords

• Hallie
• Tyriq

Topics:

• People really like potatoes and I don't get it
• I wear shorts now.
• Why are these ants on my desk?
• The go-getters of predawn gym
• Non feathered dinosaurs in the public imagination
  • Esper says: Magic: the Gathering does have feathered dinosaurs as part of its mesoamerican-inspired setting, which look cool as hell. Not all of them are completely covered or anything, but Gishath is a good example of how to make a dinosaur look really intimidating and powerful while still having feathers. https://scryfall.com/card/xln/222/gishath-suns-avatar
• McPop

Microtopics:

• Not counting the Zelda game you made.
• Mashing up the hummus beans.
• Tahini texture.
• Garbanzo merengue.
• Cutting-edge vegan technology.
• Making video games until you learn better.
• The freezer popsicle that's just a tube of flavored water.
• Potato struggle sessions.
• Curly fries versus seasoned curly fries.
• A waste of a hearty food that should last longer.
• Century potatoes.
• Burying a potato in the ground and setting a peat bog on fire.
• Taro chips.
• The bag in the grocery store that says "veggie sticks" and there's a picture of fresh vegetables on the bag but inside it's just potato slurry fried into stick form.
• Anti-shorts positions.
• A tattoo in a conspicuous place.
• Showing up to a game jam in a Voldo harness.
• A tattoo that makes it look like you've been scratching a rash.
• Getting a cool tattoo and starting going to the gym because you want to be worthy of the tattoo.
• A slovenly dude in a fedora getting a sick tattoo of a slovenly dude in a fedora.
• Yakuza style tattoos except it's all video game shit.
• Leaving an olive under your desk.
• What the ants are into lately.
• House Ants.
• Storehouses of finger dust.
• Letting the ants have the olive.
• Mice with an exoskeleton.
• Sitting on a toilet made of ants and instantly becoming one with the ants.
• A bottle of Ginger Ants.
• Extremely tangy abyss.
• What is in my mouth? What is in my bed?
• Rolling a ball of goo over your keyboard.
• Finding some good goo and keeping it to yourself.
• The validity of shipping yourself with things.
• Merging your cats.
• Motivated brothers.
• Waking up at 5:30 to go to the gym.
• Go-gettitude.
• Chronotypes.
• Expressing all the aspirational aspects of yourself.
• The only person flexing in the mirrors.
• Why is this young teen here so early?
• Pretty ripped. (For a child.)
• Giving up on waking up before dawn and becoming the kind of go-getter who gets later things.
• Reconstructing dinosaurs based on what people think they should look like.
• Semi-mythical creatures. (That actually existed.)
• Microraptors that are slightly melty.
• 65, with Adam Driver.
• An interesting concept, executed poorly.
• The Pepsisaur.
• Adam Driver running away from horny dudes crawling around in mocap suits and the test audiences hate it so they CGI in some horny humanoid dinosaurs.
• Having kids and patching ET so the government agents don't have guns and then after your kids grow up, patching ET so they have extra guns.
• Twelve gauge flashlights.
• Lemmings but with babies.
• One of each type of eye.
• Eyes that are so human looking that it kind of fucks you up.
• A reverse The Fly situation.
• McPopHouse.
• The Junta of Tralfaz.
• Picking up a new key and trying it on every locked door you've ever seen.
• Pressing insert to empty your sexual tension meter.
• Back before Microsoft Word owned the .doc extension.
• A hoary pld PD Turbo 3.0 include file circa 1985.
• Sentences from shareware documentation that have been in your head for 30 years.
• BBS Doors.
• Legend of the Red Dragon.
• Reprising your role as Olmec.

Support Topic Lords

• Jenni
• Tyriq

Topics:

• King Leonardo and His Short Subjects
  • https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/WesternAnimation/KingLeonardoAndHisShortSubjects
• Nervous Subject
  • https://sims.fandom.com/wiki/Nervous_Subject
• Subject Zero
  • https://masseffect.fandom.com/wiki/Jack
• On the Subject of Poetry By W. S. Merwin
  • https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poetrymagazine/browse?contentId=26014
• Royal subjects
• Subject 13
  • https://www.mobygames.com/game/84773/subject-13/

Microtopics:

• The only place on the internet you can hear subjects discussed.
• Subject Lords.
• Finding video games in places that don't exist.
• Renaming the spreadsheet to the Subject Bucket.
• A hand me down Rocky and Bullwinkle bedsheet set.
• Rocky and Bullwinkle indoctrination.
• How many seasons the Flintstones ran for.
• The Classic Wikipedia Was.
• Wacky Racers.
• Whether Winston has ever tried Circus Peanuts.
• Enjoying one Circus Peanut every three years.
• How to buy just one Circus Peanut.
• Sawing a nickel in half before money became pre-scored.
• Whether jokes were funny in the past.
• Two troublemaking nephews named Duke and Earl.
• Mr. Mad's plan to trap the king.
• One actor playing more than one character all in one take.
• Somebody the Explainer.
• A Nancy strip where the joke revolves around knowing that people used to take their shoes off in movie theaters.
• Show Swap day at the movie theater.
• Waiting in the closet for the grim reaper to show up and then jumping out and being really seductive.
• Closet-pilled.
• Multiple people dying in the same yoga class and the grim reaper just sticks around instead of leaving and coming back.
• Yogaing while old. (YWO.)
• First name nervous, last name subject.
• Born pregnant by aliens.
• Nervous Subject vs. Nervous Object.
• Pressing X to wisecrack.
• Getting quests from Lord British and killing some monsters.
• The Vic Viper and the Road British.
• A pop culture character who hits the center of the Venn diagram.
• Writing Mass Effect fanfiction for Glittermitten Grove
• 10,000 Boolean variables that can be triggered by your narrative choices.
• Narratively justifying how getting a donut leads to your death.
• Generating alive/dead states for everybody.
• The tortured but boring space marine guy with a tragic soldier past that isn't very interesting.
• The girl who is just a cloud of gas under her hazard suit.
• The man who slouches listening to the wheel revolving in the stream, yet there is no wheel there to revolve.
• The reason the wheel turns – though there is no wheel.
• Sitting at the end of March.
• Deckard Bane.
• Hortatoriness.
• How do we feel about monarchies?
• Tropical fruit tree drama.
• The Miami Fruit Organization.
• Ordering a moonbeam in a jar from Instacart.
• Where in the fruit the seed wants to be.
• The banana that evolved for the seed to pop out and hit you in the face as soon as you start peeling it and that's how they invented firearms.
• Figuring out how to hold an avocado like a gun.
• Fruit with Velcro-style hook and loop.
• Fruit you should avoid if you have a mucous membrane.
• Subscribing to durians for $199 per week.
• Turning the pineapple upside down.
• The pineapple as a symbol of hospitality.
• A video game with many of the components a video game would have.
• The taking robots from the System Shock series.
• A pre-rendered background Final Fantasy 7 type deal.
• Cinematic platformers starring spheres.
• Conflating two games made by Francophones.
• Namable group chats.
• Getting a Bluesky invite just so you can park your domain.

Support Topic Lords

• Tyriq
• Hallie

Topics:

• The world needs more clues for secrets nearby
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUXow3d3-b0
• How kids on tv used to hate leftovers
• Smartphone sales declined 11% in 2022 while sales of flip phones doubled
• https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/44272/the-road-not-taken
• What will emoji look like in 100 years?
• I have invented a conspiracy regarding the shape of hand-held supermarket baskets

Microtopics:

• Lumps.
• Lumpy Space Princess.
• The best Space Princesses.
• A completely different two Ls.
• A good first vertically scrolling shooter.
• Electric vehicle backing up noises.
• Collecting Tesla license plates whenever you hear the Tesla collectible item noise.
• The most sound-designed thing you interact with on a regular basis.
• What kind of noises electric motorcycles make.
• The laser you can point at any window to turn it into a speaker.
• Bubb Rubb's reaction to whistle tips.
• An urban legend about a haunted car driving down the freeway.
• Advertisers beaming holograms directly into your AR goggles.
• The city where instead of taxes they have ads and you're not allowed into the city without wearing the AR goggles at all times, even in the shower.
• Wandering into the woods to escape the ubiquitous advertising but the birds have learned to repeat the ads.
• Birds who sing the song that turns your skull into a speaker.
• A scrub jay watching you with binoculars from across the street, reading your lips while you talk about the brown note, so it can teach the rest of the birds the song that makes the humans shit their pants.
• Describing memes on podcasts.
• The fungus that killed all the leftovers so the leftovers we eat today are a completely different varietal of leftovers.
• Why leftovers-flavored jelly beans don't taste like real leftovers.
• Spending more money so people don't perceive you as poor.
• Food that you don't have to cook again.
• Eating pizza straight out of the freezer.
• Taking an ice cold slice of pizza into a hot shower.
• Toaster pizza.
• Cat body temperature pizza.
• Rosemary garlic pop tarts.
• Whether a day old poptart you forgot in the toaster counts as leftovers.
• Leftunders.
• Increasing crime by 100% but it's all good crime.
• Flip phones Georg and whether he should be counted.
• If anyone in the world decides not to eat something, that thing is canonically leftovers.
• Wanting to be in a forest.
• Dudes talking about themselves and the roads they've traveled.
• The Most Misread Poem in America.
• Pop quiz: individualism or fake individualism?
• Doing a Twitter poll every time you are making a life decision and then taking the road less traveled by.
• Dialects of emoji.
• What Unicode looks like in the future where we communicate by swapping brain lobes with each other momentarily.
• Doing the emoji hand clap for every word thing in your Great American Novel.
• A screen reader reading out ascii art of a forest and after six minutes the blind user is like "nice forest!"
• What the audio book for House of Leaves sounds like.
• Lexicalogical collapse.
• Veiny eggplant.
• Which end of the eggplant emoji the droplets go on.
• Genetically modifying eggplants so they look like dicks while unbeknownst to you another scientist is genetically modifying dicks so they look like eggplants and everyone remains confused.
• Going to the bulk bin and scooping rice directly into your shopping basket.
• If rice is like water and Bruce Lee is like water then Bruce Lee is like rice.
• Trying to Tetris into a curve.
• When a service works perfectly fine and they change things for no reason.
• Searching Podcast Addict for a podcast and it comes back with a one episode podcast called "Please Update Podcast Addict"
• Uber and Lyft becoming uncompetitive because they're trying to be profitable.
• Ads that aren't even beamed directly into your skull so that good are they?
• Advertising by teleporting a brain hemisphere of someone who loves your product with your target audience so you can share their knowledge.

Support Topic Lords

• Avery
• Tyriq

Topics:

• Adam, Father of all humankind, was maybe a giant
• Heathcliff is still going and it's weird
• I've heard a million novelty metal covers but still nobody's done Truly Scrumptious / Doll on a Music Box from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
• "The Phone Call" by James Tate

Microtopics:

• Withholding all your best URLs until the end of the episode.
• Using lowercase Ls in place of Is and seeing if anybody notices.
• Leaving capitalizations to the whims of chaos. (Your fingers.)
• Teachers explaining that if you can't write in cursive by junior high your teachers will throw things at you and call you stupid.
• Adam and Eve growing to 18 feet tall.
• Pre-flood humans and their towering heights/lifespans/IQs.
• How to make your wisdom teeth fit again.
• Conspiracy theories that have no bearing on anything.
• Fighting wars over the estimated radius of the earth.
• The Nephilim.
• YHWH fanfiction.
• How many Jesuses are alive today.
• The friend you have with superhuman charisma and whether they ended up starting a cult.
• Getcherself a nice cult, settle down, have a thousand babies.
• The guy who was both a dwarf and a giant during his lifetime.
• Every tall person having been short at one point.
• Chain-smoking tweens drinking martinis and yelling at their secretaries.
• A Topic Lords ouroboros.
• Hypothesizing why the elderly people Heathcliff lives with have a child.
• Having a child for some reason.
• A humanoid robot with the word "meat" printed on its chest.
• The kind of people who read comics every day.
• Zippy the Pinhead.
• A weird underground subculture comic that somehow made it into newspaper syndication.
• Mustache Mondays vs. Mustache Lasagna.
• A milk mustache but for lasagna.
• A cartoon anvil that has its weight imprinted on it.
• Two side characters explaining the situation to each other.
• One of the birds says to the other, "Christ, what an asshole."
• Historians a thousand years from now deciding whether Heathcliff should be included in the Bible.
• After recorded media stops being a thing, episodes of The Simpsons being passed down as oral history.
• Rhapsodes.
• Contests for the best rhapsode.
• Hector of the Shining Helmet vs. Hector the Booty Inspector.
• Fillet episodes in the Odyssey and the Iliad.
• The Flaming Lips album that comes on four CDs that your supposed to play simultaneously, but nobody's ever bothered.
• How they handle hidden tracks on Spotify.
• How to deal with skits when you're ripping rap albums to mp3.
• The Meat Puppets playing a set in the middle of Nirvana'a MTV Unplugged set.
• Writing a song about a shooting star who's been turned into a rat and has just fallen in love with someone named Tristran, and trying to figure out what rhymes with Tristran.
• Working at the Brill Building.
• Tin Pan Alley.
• Nearly jumping out of your pants.
• Taking a high-paying job as a murder victim.
• The one where people wear horse skulls.
• The Scrambler, from issue #12 where the panels were all out of order.
• Working at the oil refinery until a giant spider comes and steals the Light of the Silmarils.
• Whether there's a werewolf in the Silmarillion.
• Biblical Exigesis.
• Getting email saying that your art is improving someone's life.
• A phone that can receive text messages but you have to pay extra to know who they're from.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Maxx
• Tyriq

Topics:

• Nancy and having a continuous tone for a hundred years
• Recommendations
• Adding trinkets to other people's time capsules
• A Psalm for the Wild-Built https://nextworldover.tumblr.com/post/705362430786748416/guooey-a-psalm-for-the-wild-built-becky

Microtopics:

• Looking down a lot while you're on a walk.
• What is this Meta for?
• Discovering that there is a cliff and having a brief high-octane experience.
• Sitting on the bus and saying the lore of the land.
• A lego minifig that you found on the street.
• Fritzi Ritz.
• Making millennial shitposts in the 1930s.
• Being wholesomely surreal for a hundred years.
• Accruing canon.
• Simple archetypes that have been honed to a point.
• Writing a new punchline to the same joke every day for a hundred years.
• Comics going on two silent retreats, one for the setup (at a monastery) and the other for the punchline (at an empty lot)
• Coronation St.
• The kids we met in 1964.
• Whether South Park is still a thing.
• Finding success at a young age and staying the same person for the rest of your life.
• Retirement or Blade Runner Retirement?
• User Friendly.
• Web comics that started when the hardest part about making a web comic is uploading an image to the internet.
• Web comics going from having bad art to having good art.
• Telling someone to like art other than the art they like.
• Politely accepting advice and then ignoring it.
• Speaking into the void to ask for music recommendations.
• If you don't see it, that's what you paid for.
• Delivering Nancy comics daily for over 100 years.
• Working on the same game for 10 years even though you like different kinds of games now.
• Working within the framework of past you.
• Every page of a webcomic as a collage of all the previous pages.
• Pokey the Penguin: updated sporadically.
• Enjoying a webcomic a lot.
• Weird semi-robot creatures.
• Haribogosean.
• Recommending someone a nice leaf.
• Wanting to accept recommendations but hating them viscerally.
• Tricking music recommendations into someone's life like a fairy tale gremlin.
• Introducing hot jams to the people of the future.
• Burying a can of cheese for a hundred years.
• Extra old tardigrades.
• A sealed piggy bank where if you want to get the tardigrades out you have to smash it on the floor.
• Opening up your terrarium every so often to swap out the moss.
• This wholesome man with this forty year old bottle ecosystem.
• The most advanced level of mummification, in which you become a mannequin.
• Dumping a pile of garbage in the forest and leaving it to your children in your will.
• The Artemis Program.
• Returning to the moon to get the geocache back.
• Inserting a completely fictional topic into the historical record.
• Wax House, Baby!
• A fake fact about the world that has been purged from Wikipedia but is still everywhere that scraped the data from Wikipedia.
• Chosts from chostville.
• The age of monetizing all your hobbies.
• Trying to make a human connection via your art.
• Digging up, modifying, and reburying other people's time capsules even though nobody's paying you to do it.
• Keeping your citizens happy and healthy.
• An intentionally altered view of how automated clothing production is.
• Going on a journey together with a robot.
• Cozy books entirely lacking in high-octane moments.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Tyriq
  • FourBitFriday in all the places
• Cort
  • Leftover Pumpkin Pie Curry https://savethefood.com/recipes/leftover-pumpkin-pie-and-turkey-curry/

Topics:

• Fantasy consoles
  • https://github.com/paladin-t/fantasy
• Tyriq's 80s homework
  • 80s homework playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3SbI8kec0NtJp8szqsl4Ek0lZHqvHjaX
  • Tyriq's reaction: https://topiclords.com/articles/80s-homework-reaction
  • I meant New Kids on the Block, of course.
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maurice_Starr
• You can't slake an earworm with 3/4 of a chorus
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlAeEcVnnvo
  • https://youtu.be/rI3yD3WAcz4
• Aesop Rock - Ruby 81
  • https://genius.com/Aesop-rock-ruby-81-lyrics

Microtopics:

• The album you finished.
• A song that is entirely made of uncleared samples.
• Turning leftover pumpkin pie into delicious pumpkin spice curry.
• Interactive Pico-8 holiday cards.
• Artificial constraints pegged at a level of technology somewhere in the 80s.
• Writing specs for Pico-16 so that you don't accidentally make Pico-16 when you're making Pico-8.
• Seeking a box to work within.
• The most played entry in your Steam library is something your kids left running for weeks.
• A collection of 50 games made for a console that never existed.
• List of Fantasy Consoles.
• The fantasy console hidden as an Easter egg in the Frog Fractions hat DLC.
• Four joysticks in your garage waiting for an arcade machine to be installed into.
• Languages that transpile to Lua.
• Emulating the PlayStation 9.
• A fantasy console for making 4D games.
• A popular game engine that starts with the letters UN.
• Civilisation's relationship with art.
• Hop's Big Adventure in the Gift Dimension.
• All the problems with Lua.
• The Pico-8 show with the Pico-Lords.
• All the things people were doing in the 80s.
• Playing an inaudible guitar.
• The sound of somebody being chased.
• All the good Meat Loaf albums.
• An inspiring thing that shows up a lot in your life.
• A hip hop album entirely devoid of metaphor.
• Listening to the first fifteen seconds of each song on an album.
• Drums that are emblematic of everything you hate about the 80s.
• A big decade with a lot of things happening.
• Gil Scott-Heron.
• Music that is distinctly of the 80s vs. music that happened to be released in the 80s.
• The musical equivalent of oatmeal.
• Not liking the whole chorus, but liking the first chord change in the chorus.
• The bass part of Like a Prayer.
• Your superpower: knowing what marmite tastes like and knowing your don't like it.
• Hyperactive j-pop with way too many chord changes.
• Creating a mashup that is better than the sum of its parts, but only for ten seconds.
• Purging an earworm with another earworm.
• We Need a Bigger Dumpster, by Cheek Face.
• The parts of your brain that you're not on speaking terms with.
• A photographic memory for all audio except for words.
• Songs about love or romance or being horny: get that shit out of here.
• "Baby Got Back," a song about Sir Mix A Lot's infant and her extremely loaded diaper.
• Waking the sleeping beagle.
• Some kind of intentional arson.
• Painting an evocative picture of an extremely specific moment in time.
• Uncles and aunts and stuff everywhere.
• Thank you, Genius!
• Bad or text-to-speech bad?
• Trying to fix all instances of a given fact that is wrong everywhere on the internet.
• Wesley Willis writing the story song "Oil Express" because he wanted to write about oil changes.
• Lords Rule, Nuff Said.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Nathan
  • MommysBestGames on Twitter.
• Tyriq
  • FourBitFriday everywhere.

Topics:

• Octopodes, continued
• My wife and I are both teaching our son to drive, with separate lessons. It's going OK but with bumps.
• The most widely-used crack for The Colonel's Bequest works by breaking the random number generator. This has wide-ranging effects on the gameplay.
  • https://www.benshoof.org/blog/case-cracked
• How are we going to fix the camera in Mario Odyssey?

Microtopics:

• Game Type DX.
• Implementing the Xbox dashboard and trying to get it approved by Sony.
• The most serious episode of Topic Lords.
• Bringing up Octopuses every three years.
• Giving yourself an electric shock because you're so bored.
• Sea pork.
• Eating the animals that are extremely convenient to farm.
• Aoes sitting around waiting for something interesting to happen.
• Chimpanzee pranks.
• Making art because that's what people do.
• Trying to disentangle making art from making a living.
• Whether zoo animals would prefer their natural habitat or whether they just enjoy a chill cool time.
• Inventing an octopus psychologist to figure out what parts of their lives they like and what parts could be improved.
• Children of Time and Children of Ruin.
• Molluscs having a good time.
• Terraforming gone awry.
• The impossibility of talking smart people out of bad ideas.
• Why a teenager might or might not want to learn to drive.
• How hard to push the brakes and how hard to push the gas.
• Pushing the gas too hard and the car is like no, take a deep breath and try again.
• Terrifying two lane roads.
• Whether to start turning before you reach the stop sign.
• Driving in Atlanta.
• Learning to drive because you have to get to college somehow.
• The responsibility of being in charge of heavy machinery.
• Driving and suddenly realizing you need to be paying way more attention right now.
• Saying the worst possible thing to someone who is already anxious.
• Detective adventure game structure.
• The botched Red Baron Easter egg.
• Walking by windows whenever possible.
• Blinking, fidgeting and moving with lifeless constancy.
• Serious Sam 3's copy protection scorpion.
• Finding the thing you're not expecting in the first place you look.
• Whether the Law and Order video games implement both Law and Order.
• A detective game where you spend most of your energy preventing the detective from having a nervous breakdown or hurting somebody.
• Game design that is driven by fun tech.
• Getting a fancy new drill press and for a while all the furniture you make has a bunch of extra holes for no apparent reason.
• An RPG character with the ability to manipulate the RNG.
• A game design critique of darts.
• Fingers in the brain, squishing.
• Why Game Genie codes are encrypted.
• The Sonic the Hedgehog 2 level editor.
• BASIC Programming and Computer Intro.
• The guy who wrote half of the Odyssey 2's game catalog.
• Whether console exclusives, or indeed video game systems at all, should exist.
• Why they set Mario Galaxy on planetoids.
• Looking into a shoebox of fun.
• Mario's fluctuating weight throughout the series.
• A classic 3D platformer problem.
• Manipulating the camera while you touch all kinds of other buttons.
• The kind of Mario game that your dad can play.
• Been solved. Not fun.
• Trying to show Portal to people who have never played first-person shooters.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday
  • https://frror.bandcamp.com/
• Chall
  • https://twitter.com/mrchrislhall

Topics:

• The future/present of Jim's mario videos.
  • https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3SbI8kec0Ntxnf9mof2tU-QZLQ0Mq6zd
• Catatcomb Kids lore in the context of the fact that I like worldbuilding but find it hard to tell actual stories.
• Bigger Luke
• The Green Street Mortuary Marching Band.
  • http://www.syndicjournal.us/a-ferlinghetti-memorial-supplement-60-narrations/ferlinghetti-memorial-supplement-the-green-street-mortuary-marching-band/
• Have you seen any phantom kangaroos? And also: should I choose to believe in cryptids? If so, which ones?

Microtopics:

• Giving someone else's biography.
• 7-Day Roguelikes.
• Feeling ambiently like you are hanging out with somebody.
• An emulator that works when you are not screen-capturing in OBS, but freezes when you are.
• Making a backup of your Bowser's Fury save.
• Video recording setup evolutions.
• The pros and cons of extremely variable video lengths.
• Playing Tony Hawk with Mario modded in.
• What working on a Zelda game does to a person, psychologically.
• Doing things that make people believe you're doing an ARG.
• Twinbeard Rates Mario.
• A robot co-host that eventually starts finishing your words for you.
• Wanting to be a writer until you try writing.
• A world that naturally develops in your brain.
• How to tell stories.
• Coming up with a bunch of characters that want things.
• Reading stories in hopes that stories rub off on you.
• Putting yourself in a situation where you write a lot of dialog trees.
• How to make a platformer without doing any level design.
• Expecting the same person to write the music and the lyrics.
• The difference in the ideation process of world building and story telling.
• A fact about the world that is true.
• Captain Thalmoo surveying the battlefield.
• Figuring out mid-burrito that there was a war, and deciding who won it.
• A grain that flowers like lavender.
• Searching Fiverr for Conlangers.
• Paying $2 for something at the Dollar Store.
• Logging Onto JimNet.
• The Canon Bigger Luke Hypothesis vs. the Hamill Hypothesis.
• The Inch-Luke Hypothesis.
• Inch-Lukers.
• Bigger Luke conspiracy theorists just assume that Han Solo stays the same size.
• The real Skywalker was the bigger Luke all along.
• The Boy Who Cried ARG.
• Promising your wife that your son will not be Frog Fractions 3.
• How many pages of laws a person is subject to at any given time.
• Designing an ARG for your teenage son and he's like "ugh dad, again?"
• Mortuary marching bands.
• The patriarch who has just croaked.
• The sister with the bent frame.
• Uncle Louie with the wig.
• Getting a free concert because someone died.
• A funeral as a pleasant gathering of people you haven't seen in a long time.
• Getting arrested for publishing Allen Ginsberg's "Howl."
• Dressing up as an ancient sea captain.
• How many funerals this marching band is playing today.
• Hiring your nephew who has a Casiotone keyboard to play your funeral.
• Hiring the Green Street Mortuary Marching Band to play at your kid's birthday but all they know how to play is Taps.
• Bringing an axe to the funeral in case there's an emergency and you need to open up the coffin quickly.
• If a guitar is an axe, a tuba is a bent axe.
• Unbending the Tuba.
• Why brass instruments are so twisty.
• If you unwind a French horn it'll reach the moon and back.
• The large flutes that are curly.
• The son of a flautist.
• A bookshelf that you blow into and music comes out.
• Potential downsides of cryptids.
• Wanting to take EMF meters into a creepy house even though you don't believe in ghosts.
• The script scientists developed to let you fall in love at will.
• How many blue coins out of five you would rate your wife.
• Taking the Race IAT every week and analyzing your results over time.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday
  • https://frror.bandcamp.com/
• Stevie
  • codroid@gmail.com

Topics:

• Striped humans
• Alternative keyboard layouts: teaching yourself to type in new horrible ways
• Where did I get these floppy disks?
• The floppy disk poems
• How do I give a tech talk?
  • https://vimeo.com/91436410
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=59hwI9Ae1qU
  • http://paperdino.com/save-the-date/

Microtopics:

• The extent of Jim's patience vis-a-vis delayed plugging.
• Wishing you didn't make things so you could talk about the things you didn't make.
• Plugging the small random things in life, like bugs.
• Sitting in a chair right now.
• Trying desperately for forty years to never use Bluetooth.
• George Michael's "Faith"
• George Michael rehearsing a Queen song.
• A Faith listening party.
• The etymology of "Lobster."
• Plugging bugs and unplugging crustaceans.
• Invisible stripes along one's epidermis.
• Mosaicism (as distinct from Chimerism.)
• Blaschko Lines.
• A secret invisible power to be striped.
• The show where nobody knows anything.
• Spiraling outward from a central point.
• A thing that is a fact if you believe Wikipedia.
• Describing an egg as ovoid because it is similar to an ovum, i.e. an egg.
• Whether a factoid is bullshit.
• Whether humans are humanoid.
• The distinction between a fact and a factoid and how it has changed over time.
• Being slightly hungry and eating a single macaronus.
• Batman training his successor in the sci-fi future.
• Joining the villain faction because they get the cool hooves and horns.
• Turning 90 and getting your internal organs tattooed.
• Check it out, here's my solar plexus. Enjoy.
• An injection that makes your bones glow in the dark.
• Cold-Turkey Colemak Switchin'.
• Holding your left pinky on the tab key to keep your place.
• Iterating until you find the episode title.
• Typing without twerking.
• Being able to get your hands to do what you want without hurting.
• Getting a split keyboard so your hands keep working.
• The ease and laziness of the Wiimote and nunchuk allowing you to put your hands anywhere you want.
• Twitchy aim dominating the PC FPS design space regardless of what the game designer wants.
• Making poem floppy disks and using them as drinking coasters.
• Cleaning out your mouse.
• Disassembling a floppy disk and folding it into the shape of the Starship Enterprise.
• Remembering where the USB floppy drive might stuff.
• Whether cursed demoscene executables still curse you if you run them in DosBox.
• Whether the Ring video still cursed you after it's digitized to DVD.
• Maybe'm or maybe'm not.
• A pretty cool knick knack.
• A human head like pancake batter.
• Bread that you put in a blender.
• The old good lord, bad lord routine.
• Picking a god and channeling its power into your tech talk.
• A community of people that you want to like and respect you.
• Various ways to prepare to give a talk, and why Tyriq always does it the wrong way.
• Going to a talk and thereby consenting to be lectured by the person giving the talk.
• Blaming the audience for picking the wrong talk if they don't like your talk.
• How to run an ARG for no money.
• Deconstructing the idea that canon and headcanon are in any way different.
• Re-telling the same story over and over again.
• Same bullshit, different number of dimensions.
• A movie that was cooler when it was just a throwaway line in another movie.
• Depicting the same overarching event but with details changed.
• Games that require you to make a choice that you can't take back.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Jenni
  • https://twitter.com/horsewizrd
• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday

Topics:

• Hot Topic
• Toe picks
  • https://imgur.com/a/ARHZn5x
• Topical medication
• Groke asks: My friend (who is completely unaware of this podcast and did this apropos of nothing) emailed the Mars chocolate company to find out why the Topic candy bar has that name. "Dear Mr Smith, Thanks for getting in touch about our MARS product. The Topic bar has been a firm favourite since it's introduction in 1962, unfortunately over time the origin of how the Topic chocolate bar came to be called Topic has been lost and now it has become a mystery that we are still trying to discover'. If you need any more information, please let us know. Kind Regards, Nasteha Tiirow Consumer Care Mars Chocolate UK Reference No: 00366098"
• Test of Proficiency in Korean
• Topic Records
  • https://myhomeworkdone.com/blog/poetry-topics/

Microtopics:

• Who has been on Topic Lords the most often.
• Plugging a leaky dog.
• Whether dogs know about consent.
• A store in the mall that teenagers go to.
• Stranger Things merch in the Hot Topic.
• Squeezing the timeline.
• The goth-emo shift of the aughts.
• The phrase "big tiddy goth girlfriend" which will far outlast the word "goth" in general usage.
• Dark Academia: emo but in school.
• Trying to do actual research in an Elden Ring library.
• Rustic Dark Academics.
• Buying a sweet Kirby t-shirt at GameStop and getting a compliment on it from your therapist.
• Minnesota: the Land of Lakes.
• Dogehouse Laser Tag.
• A variety show that shows a variety of Youtube videos.
• The internet and real life merging, to the detriment of both realms.
• Everyone's top four toes.
• Intrusive thoughts about feet, the worst body part.
• What the guy who runs the nude model sketch thing thinks of your feet vis-a-vis your age.
• The most awkward encounter of your life until the next day when you run into the same guy again.
• Sending a picture of your feet to the same friend every year.
• Putting 720° in a Marble Madness cabinet so that when people can't figure out how to play it and ask you how, you can ask them to show you their feet.
• Top ten toe beans.
• Mr. Frito-Lay smelling a dog foot and thinking "I want a chip that smells like this!"
• Nothin' but thumbs.
• Whether a horse hoof is just one big toenail.
• What people would look like if they had the proportions of animals.
• The indecency of seeing a bird's knee.
• Medication you're supposed to use topically but it also tastes good.
• The ester they use to indicate that even though this hand lotion smells good, it also smells like you shouldn't put it in your mouth.
• Very petroleum-based very fake coconut.
• Chris Hemsworth answering a question at a press conference when one of his assistants says "it's time for your hourly chicken" and shoves a chicken breast in his mouth.
• Deep-frying the inedible part of the edamame.
• Chewing your food as many times as possible.
• Elaborate traffic jam metaphors for chewing food.
• Hitting the big four-two.
• The Box of Celebrations.
• Describing a Twix bar without ever saying the name Twix.
• When the moon hits your eye like a big chocolate gravy, that's a mole.
• Trying to buy just one Andes Mint so you go to a hotel or a steakhouse in 1997 but the host won't let you buy it, they're like "just take it and leave."
• Triscuit: it's one more than a biscuit.
• Champion Racehorse Electricity Biscuit.
• The Shape of Electricity, starring Pikachu.
• Winston drinking all of your water.
• Being proud that you translated a sign in a language you're learning, then looking just below that sign and seeing a translated sign in your native language just below it.
• Sneaking into somebody's room and replacing their diary with their diary translated into Korean.
• Saloon: just a salon with an extra O.
• The room where you keep your art collection in a pile on the floor and visitors can come in to dig through it.
• The podcast where we talk about Robin Tunney.
• Selling Soviet and left-wing political music by mail order.
• The Hundred Best Poetry Topics.
• Why it is so frustrating to be frustrated.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Ben
  • https://twitter.com/KosmologyB
• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday

Topics:

• Which real life occupations are the closest thing to actual Adventuring? And would you want to do any of them?
• Getting a tattoo has somehow motivated me to be healthier
• It's weird that some instruments you play with your hands and others you put in your mouth
• The Mushroom Hunters
  • https://www.themarginalian.org/2019/11/25/the-mushroom-hunters-animation-neil-gaiman/
• Discovering how much butter and sugar is in your common or garden cake has filled me with sheer horror
• A public call to action for the creation of Violence/Threat Jazz as a genre

Microtopics:

• The collection of music songs that you put on the internet last year.
• The Citizen Sleeper trailer.
• Managing a game's Steam store page.
• The conversations you don't have.
• Adventuring as it is conceived of and perceived.
• Going into the field and being exposed to health hazards.
• Rock climbing and its relationship to speed running.
• All the big parts of the world having been discovered already so you need to be satisfied with discovering tiny parts.
• The difficulty of spending a lifetime rock climbing when you don't enjoy rock climbing.
• Whether being sent off to war feels or ought to feel like an adventure.
• Lockdown tattoos.
• The uncle who convinced you to get an eyebrow ring.
• Designing a tattoo so that it still looks right if the recipient suddenly gets swole.
• The Clean and Jerk.
• Compressing yourself inwards as you hit the ground.
• The idea of caring about your appearance.
• Looking in the mirror and feeling good about yourself.
• A portion of meat that is ruining your aesthetic.
• Your full-sleeve Gigantamax Meowth tattoo.
• Ark from Terranigma.
• A tattoo of a goat because you love goats a lot.
• Putting pictures on your body and looking cool.
• Going full body-mod in your old age.
• A Rotom right up there in your armpit.
• Walking around looking like a JRPG character with an asymmetrical pauldron.
• The right torso for me.
• Bone tattoos that are just for you because nobody can see your bones.
• Waiting until you are 80 years old for eyeball tattoo technology to get safer.
• Screaming higher and higher until you take a shower.
• Airflow and handflow.
• Licking a musical instrument that makes noise when it's wet.
• Chromatic spittoon virtuosos.
• Melody Pops.
• How to survive long car trips before portable video games.
• Lollipops you could write with.
• Chocolate cigarettes wrapped in rice paper.
• Rebranding your offensive children's cigarette brand to "Fads."
• The formulation of laws to follow facts revealed.
• Food Tasters.
• One king left and so much food to eat.
• Why so much fiction is so obsessed with royalty.
• Cracking a nut in your brain.
• The moon's excellent product placement.
• Cakes for people to jump out of.
• How to marble a cake.
• The butter iceberg.
• The inside scoop behind all the drama.
• The Sharks and the Jets snapping at each other.
• The dude in Mad Max Fury Road playing a flaming guitar on top of a moving truck.
• Where to see Ben's cats.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday
  • https://frror.bandcamp.com/
• Stevie
  • https://www.hryx.net

Topics:

• Watching TAS videos and wondering how much of what is happening is necessary vs flourish
• If Jeff Bezos wanted to recreate Jurassic Park
• Chocolate-dipped fruit has such an enormous gulf between perceived effort and actual effort that as a gift giver or potluck attendee you are all but obligated to take advantage
• Strong Men, Riding Horses by Gwendolyn Brooks
  • https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poetrymagazine/browse?contentId=28113
• The creators of Earthworm Jim: Where are they now?

Microtopics:

• Tunic.
• Finding collectible pages of a game's manual inside the game.
• Games in fake languages.
• Playing imported games in emulation and trying to figure out how to play even though you don't speak the language.
• Curveballs.
• A monthly in-person cozy casual game development meetup.
• Discovering what people mean by "within" when people say "inquire within."
• What happened to all of the art.
• What a whale bone smells like after you clean it.
• Whether it's grosser to drink bone marrow or eat oysters.
• The most charming of all the crabs.
• TAS runs.
• The various kinds of tools that might assist you in creating a tool-assisted speed run.
• Human-Mediated Speed Runs, or HMSRs.
• Proving the ideal speed run.
• Some kind of sequence that is based on a timer.
• When the TAS run does a little dance and you're trying to figure out whether that's important to the run or if they're just killing time.
• The game became Snake.
• Whether coffee cures or causes cancer.
• Like listening in a mirror.
• The vapors.
• Trillionaires not being as rich as they used to be.
• A big big island full of organisms that are just waiting to be coated in gold.
• Painting your entire body and dying somehow.
• Lemur-friendly paints.
• People who've eaten breakfast and then died.
• Dipping some shit in some crap.
• Watching Food Network to discover the Science of Chocolate.
• An attractive morsel.
• Pastries with fruit fillings.
• A solid cube of a mass of dessert-object.
• Taking advice from someone who hasn't even been on several hundred podcasts.
• Frantically putting the Topic Lords banner back on your wall when you see Jim approaching.
• Releasing Topic Lords episodes.
• Shuffling off of this mortal topic.
• Making a movie to promote your new chocolate bar.
• A type of chocolate that tries to be solid.
• Spaghetti-Os as a back formation of Spaghetti-O-ification, which is what happens when pasta passes through a black hole's event horizon.
• Using Hawking radiation to retrieve lost Spaghetti-Os from within black holes.
• The movie playing the sound of somebody peeing to let you know that now's when you get up to use the bathroom.
• A crowd of people doing foley work for a restaurant scene in Murder She Wrote.
• Picking somebody for Animatronic Angela Lansbury to murder and then picking somebody for her to pin it on when she solves the crime.
• The fine line between true and false.
• The fine line between foot and floor.
• Desert-eyed, rentless strong men pasted to stars already.
• A source of praise for the patriarchy.
• Addled by landlords.
• Whether being pasted to the stars is good.
• The elbow of the topics.
• Earthworm Jim.
• A muscular goofball earthworm.
• Whether you can say "groovy" and still be angry.
• A strict no-sequels policy.
• Not the thing you're here to talk about.
• George "The Fat Man" Sanger.
• Wall-E but a Roomba but also one of those 90s wireless phone cradles.
• Games you can play for free on the web.
• All the good times we had at Blockbuster Video renting movies from Blockbuster Video.
• How public libraries still exist and offer more movies than your local Blockbuster Video had and they're free and you keep them for a month rather than two days but nobody gives a shit because libraries don't have branding or advertising.
• A perfect solution to a problem that everybody wants solved urgently.
• Weirdly buff creatures that should not be buff.
• Music band with animal companion solves mystery.
• The Dog & The Stoner & The Band & The Ghost.
• Queen Slug-for-a-Butt.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday
• Xander

Topics:

• The year was 1998, and choosing a name with numbers in it was a completely normal thing to do.
  • http://www.dkriesel.com/en/blog/2013/0802_xerox-workcentres_are_switching_written_numbers_when_scanning
• How do you overcome the inertia of old familiar tools when trying to learn new ways to do the same thing?
• I confused Daniel Day-Lewis with Lou Diamond Phillips for years, thinking they were the same person. I'm not sure why but my hypothesis is that it's because they both have three names and they both have that "lou" sound in there.
  • If you really have to know: https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/dtxjg/til_that_limp_bizkit_actually_means/
• Sweater Weather: a Love Song to Language, by Sharon Bryan
  • https://www.writersalmanac.org/index.html%3Fp=5543.html
• I'm gonna try to make a bartop arcade machine with unconventional controls, I think. Anybody have any tips or suggestions or anything? Also more generally: How about that meatspace creativity? Anybody make anything that occupies real world space lately?
• Ithkuil: the inscrutable conlang that was co-opted by Russian Buddhist cultists

Microtopics:

• Making games and albums.
• In the pluggable range.
• The history of Byzantium.
• The weird mysteries of what happened, what we know, what we don't know, and what didn't happen.
• An average of all the books that don't exist.
• Taking the average of two books.
• The square root of negative Garfield.
• A lossy compression algorithm for plain text.
• The most information dense thing you can change.
• LLLL Cool J.
• Beware the LLs of March.
• All the numbers you might append to your user name.
• Wanting or not wanting to be like Xeno746.
• Social signaling by putting numbers in your user name or by not putting numbers in your user name.
• Role-playing having sponsors because all your idols are influencers.
• Using the term "Information Superhighway" unironically.
• Visually decorating your name.
• Putting card suit emojis around your name and then appending "-chocolate"
• Encoding your identity in emojis and adding them to your user name.
• The double inertias of trying to move plus leaving your comfort zones.
• Jim's advice for learning a new tool.
• Working with a tool the way it's intended to be used.
• Petting a cat the wrong way as a metaphor.
• Actors we confuse with each other.
• Hearing two bands on the same mixtape and getting them confused for the rest of your life.
• Refusing to explain a gross band name on the show.
• Trying to figure out what sex act your parents named you after.
• That Tom Lehrer song that's just a list of all the elements, except it's all your favorite turns of phrase.
• Making a melody so dissonant and weird that the listener dissociates from music and just hears a sequence of pitches on its own merits.
• Having a tongue party in your mouth.
• The Sultan of Swat.
• Loose Lips Buck Up.
• Lifty Nifty, Bright and Shifty.
• Making a bartop arcade machine with unconventional controls.
• The kinetic feel of throwing and catching a flywheel.
• Flipping a series of switches in quick succession.
• A totally arbitrary control scheme that would be weird and interesting for one game but it's been used for thousands.
• Designing your pinball table so that players nudge your pinball cabinet a bit but not too much.
• Reasons for subtle variation in how pinball tables play.
• Buying banned pinball parts at the pinball black market.
• A pinball simulation of shooting cans with a gun.
• The seesaw lever thing for going along the rails.
• Bowling with a shuffleboard.
• Being over monetizing your art.
• Non-Functional Bullshit.
• Non-Fungible Game Experiences, such as when the party you're DMing tries to intimidate NPCs with a severed leg.
• Hobbies that feed your family.
• Making sure your game remains mysterious by ensuring nobody cares enough to solve them.
• Simmering on a thought before you express it.
• Crunchy conlangs.
• Idiosyncratic Oblasts of Russia.
• Telling your boss at the DMV that you need time off to go speak to Russian Buddhist alien abduction cultists about the obscure conlang you invented.
• Taking something functional and making something non-functional out of it to find out what it would look like.
• A Dewey Decimal System for individual words.
• Inventing a categorization system for all human knowledge that's extremely focused on maritime concerns.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• James
  • https://twitter.com/triplefox
• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday

Topics:

• Nostalgia is a curse
  • https://bluerenga.blog/tag/adventure-500/?order=ASC
• Nonogram puzzles
  • https://www.kesiev.com/stampadia/
• As the exodus continues, all that will be left of the public-facing internet will increasingly be the people too hard-headed or hard-hearted to burn out.
  
  • https://inessential.com/2021/10/04/in_case_i_dont_write_here_again
• The Village of Reason
  • https://www.lyrikline.org/en/poems/village-reason-8055
• Instead of writing in a journal, recording the journal on the phone

Microtopics:

• Extending your failure through time.
• Swatch clock, Swatch clock! Swatch clock, Swatch clock!
• Swatch Internet Time.
• Counting up from the beginning of time, January 1st, 1970.
• The perfect method of keeping time.
• A Swatch body horror beast.
• The promise of being made of meat.
• UFO 50's release date: May 5th, 5050.
• Deciding that nobody should feel your least favorite emotion.
• Making a new better future without looking to the past for your aspirations.
• The world before Later On.
• Remembering 80s pop songs way better than when you last took a shower.
• Making a mix tape with a song on it about when you last took a shower and sending it back in time to your younger self so this kid will listen to that song over and over and you can finally remember when you last took a shower.
• Nostalgia vs. taste.
• Trying to replicate your favorite thing and falling to replicate it, but the failure is way more interesting than the thing you were copying.
• Adventure 500.
• Recreating something you love from memory.
• A game jam where everyone picks an old video game they like and tries to recreate it from memory without looking at any references.
• Simplifying while depicting by choosing what details to focus on.
• An inverted form of nostalgia.
• Cloak and Dagger (1984)
• Putting product placement of the video game adaptation of your movie in your movie, but then the video game never comes out because it's 1984.
• Pepper's Adventures in Time.
• All the names of Nonogram puzzles.
• Finding out about Nonogram puzzles and deciding to try them and finding the hardest one you can, and after a few days of being unable to solve it you put it into a Nonogram solving program and it tells you this is an impossible puzzle.
• The Konami Pixel Puzzle Collection.
• When you do and when you don't want to be stultified.
• Roguelike Celebration.
• Beach Umbrella Games.
• Printing out a generated dungeon and solving it like a Sudoku.
• Utter not-knowing-where-to-start-ness.
• thewebsitethatyougotoeveryday.com
• Rolling dice and losing all your chill.
• Retiring to the offline colonies.
• The potential that you could hypothetically be friends with every cool person in the world.
• A person who tweets whimsical things.
• A video essay on TikTok that includes screenshots of Twitter.
• Trying to make friends by dumping your sugar in the street.
• The different life choices you might've made if you had to make friends in real life.
• Befriending an ant colony and watching your friend count shoot through the roof.
• Trying to wedge a crowbar of understanding into a cryptic poem.
• All the ways reading poetry can make you feel bad about yourself.
• The actual thing and the shadow it casts.
• Taking your hindbrain for a brisk jog around the block.
• Needing to play Brain Age for the Nintendo DS before you can understand this poem.
• Omitting words from your poetry reading because it's all about the words you don't say.
• Whether it is entertaining to learn how to analyze poetry in public.
• Q.R. Hand, Jr.
• Applauding: too loud. Too scary. It startles the poet.
• Terminator, Jr.
• Transitioning from writing your thoughts in a journal to recording your thoughts on your phone, to just talking to yourself, as you realize what you actually want to get out of the process.
• Trying to remember anything ever.
• Collecting art references.
• Reading the phrase "mariachi trumpets" in your diary and trying to figure out what it means.
• GPS tagging your journal entries so you can retrace your steps thirty years later.
• An open source phone that nobody will ever use because there are no apps for it.
• A bed contraption that, when the alarm rings, dumps you into your outfit for the day and makes you breakfast.
• Writing with your hand maybe two times a year and wondering how much more disused handwriting needs to get before people will be willing to stop teaching it in grade school.
• Being told in math class that you need to learn this stuff because you won't have a calculator all the time which is technically true because they won't let you keep your phone while you take the SATs.
• How to navigate the internet and discern fact from fiction.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Tyriq
  • FourBitFriday everywhere.
  • https://www.ckgame.net/
• Chall
  • @MrChrisLHall

Topics:

• How cars age vs how people age
• Learning the wrong lesson from childrens media (due to being an incompetent child)
• BOFH: Servers Under Siege
  • https://www.old-games.com/download/1796/bastard-operator-from-hell-servers
• Korn - Freak on a Leash
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRGrNDV2mKc
  • Unedited (syncable) commentary: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_L7WeZVlQ0
• Do other people just have boring dreams??
  • Forgot to mention on the show, but on the Topic Lords discord, dreams go in #announcements.
• Turns out, running has everything I love about walking, but it's very time efficient
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUXow3d3-b0

Microtopics:

• Make game.
• The properties of houseplants.
• TikToks of feral houseplants.
• Three people trying to remember the name of the musical starring Rick Moranis about carnivorous plant.
• One (1) 2004 Toyota Camry, tan.
• Speaker covers turning into sand.
• Sometimes being in charge of your body and sometimes being in charge of your car and sometimes being in charge of both.
• A make of cars as an enormous number of identical twins.
• Paint is shirts for cars.
• Whether paint is shirts for cars or tattoos for cars.
• Coming home with a new nose and nobody recognizes you.
• Cars doing most of their aging in instants.
• Seeing a car for the first time in many years and being unsure whether it accumulated all those dents and scratches over many years, or if someone took a hammer to it five minutes ago.
• An airplane outside of your house waiting for you to finish recording this podcast so you can board.
• Plastic surgery for an airplane.
• Getting tired looking at your aging car so you cover it with sweet blue LEDs and now nobody can ever look at it again.
• Being sarcastic in movie for children who are too young to understand sarcasm.
• What happens when young foolish screenwriters try to write wise old characters.
• Bad ways of teaching history.
• Teaching only the things you can test.
• Learning how to extract meaning from the things you read.
• Triaging the attention paid to your students so your ignore your best students who don't need your help but also ignoring your worst students because what the hell am I gonna do with this guy??
• A fun movie depicting a series of events that happen.
• Whether hitting people with sticks is fun.
• Bastard Operator From Hell.
• Sysadmins writing revenge fantasies on Usenet about screwing over their incompetent users.
• Indie games from the early aughts that are playable on the Amiga and Commodore 64.
• A sysadmin with a rocket launcher.
• Pokey the Penguin.
• Arctic Circle-Candy.
• All the Pokey the Penguin fan games that came from the Pokey the Penguin mailing list.
• Prodly the Puffin.
• Parchment, the Z-Machine interpreter written in JavaScript.
• 0-Hour Game Jam.
• RPG Maker vs. RPG Maker '99.
• Coming on the show and donating of your time and topics.
• Indie games starting to exist now that mainstream games are made by dozens of people.
• MadMaze.
• LadderMan: He's a man! He's a ladder!
• Whether the video for Freak on a Leash could be made today and still be western-style animation.
• Extremely red coffee.
• Whether they're pouring steaming blood into this coffee mug or maybe you just have Flux on.
• Playing hopscotch at the precipice of a cliff.
• A cop drawing a gun to stop you from jumping off a cliff.
• Where's Hopscotch Girl?
• The kind of person who would prominently display a cookie jar and never fill it.
• A speeding bullet rapidly leaving a party like "this party sucks"
• A hundred page forum thread arguing about whether the plane on a treadmill will take off.
• Weird creatures that have eyes but no mouth and vice versa.
• A bullet bee making bullet honey.
• A music video that is just a Ganon fight with two posters firing bullets back and forth at each other.
• A bullet intended to pierce someone's ear but it just goes right through their gauge.
• A DOS program you can use with your SoundBlaster.
• A blanket you can use to increase the strangeness of your dreams.
• Whether most people have boring dreams or whether most people are just bad storytellers.
• Things happening because of other things.
• Dreams where the whole dream is that you know a fact.
• How to know whether someone is the president of Nairobi.
• Running on the path you used to walk on and seeing way more bugs per minute.
• Gauging your mouth so that you can collect even more bugs while running.
• Installing a whistle tip in your mouth so you make an incredibly loud whistling noise while running around.
• Getting into blood doping just because you want to get high.
• The nicest form of Mustard Gas.
• Soaking your clothes with essential oil of lavender so passers by are like "I love the smell of lavender" and then they die because all the oxygen has been replaced with lavender.
• The new exercise fad where you go running while looking behind you, terrified.
• Bubb Rubb lauding Missile Tips. "The missiles go woooo!"
• Being super into being witnessed.
• Throwing a stumble scramble into your jogging routine and everybody around you panicking as they try to figure out what you're running from.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Nathan
  • https://twitter.com/MommysBestGames/
  • http://www.mommysbestgames.com/
• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday/
  • https://www.ckgame.net/

Topics:

• The length of poles with which to not touch things as a measure of repulsion
• Weezer just released a new album. You can already listen to it, on demand, for free on youtube. How do they, or any band make money today?
• Why is the Doom Plasma Rifle like that
• Yeasayer - Ambling Alp
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JyBl5ZgnEr4
  • Unedited (syncable) commentary: https://youtu.be/avmEL1T03qA
• Why does the Metaverse look so bland?

Microtopics:

• Getting feedback and becoming insecure.
• Entertaining each other.
• 400 Microsoft points.
• What you would do if you were lame.
• Whatever you call the boy version of Lisa Frank.
• Pillboxing.
• The consequences of an extremely wide screen.
• The Big Steel Battalion Box.
• Various pole lengths, esp. the one from How The Grinch Stole Christmas.
• The length of the pole with which you don't want to touch continue.
• A ten foot pole with haptic feedback so you can touch things with it.
• Poking something with a stick to discover how gross it is.
• Whether pole vaulting is ridiculous.
• Whether pole vaulting is real or just exists in Tremors and The Last Jedi.
• That Dutch town where everybody uses communal poles to vault across the river, and how it's all Uber poles now and you have to pay rental fees.
• Nobody being trained for pole vaulting but the coach is like "does anyone want to just try it so we don't lose this pole vaulting event by default" and everyone looks at you.
• The most salient thing about pole vaulting.
• How a band might still make money if some rando uploads their album to Youtube.
• Content-ID's failure modes.
• Living in a world where piracy won over paying for things.
• Trying to watch a movie, where piracy is easier than figuring out how to pay, vs. trying to play a video game where paying is easier than figuring out how to pirate it
• All the ways you can support a band financially other than paying for the music, because everyone just listens for free.
• The most American gun ever made.
• Whether the Doom plasma rifle overheats after it runs out of ammo.
• Punishing the player for being careful.
• What Tom Hall would've written in the Doom Bible about the plasma rifle if he still worked at id.
• A geodesic dome with two of the triangles painted red.
• A guy with a mirror for a face.
• Someone who lives in the cheese.
• Reverse nachos, where things come out of the cheese and eat you.
• If the Grim Reaper had a mirror instead of a skull.
• This Squishing Face.
• Not being allowed to punch the mirror-faced boxer above the neck.
• Trying to sing while people pull on your lips.
• Getting drenched in VHS fluid.
• Homer Simpson in hell taking and spitting out one bite each of infinite burgers.
• Whether they are mustard men or cheese men.
• Peeling off the cheese and realizing there is a dude in your cheese.
• Taking a bite out of a chocolate Easter bunny and the live bunny inside wriggles out and hops away.
• Mole.
• The music video continuing to be weird while you talk about food.
• All the naked people in the desert lying on astronaut blankets and closing their legs relative to the camera.
• Making s'mores in a solar oven.
• Extremely white flesh in the bright, bright sun.
• Facebook giving the Olive Garden treatment to Second Life.
• Making the Metaverse as uncool as possible.
• Shipping a half dozen telepresence robots to every employee's house so they can have a conference call.
• Gravitating towards whatever process or technology has the least friction.
• Spelling it as if you are giving a gift to Bit Friday.
• Possessivemommysbestgames.com

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• James
  • https://vulpine.club/@triplefox
  • https://twitter.com/triplefox
• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday/
  • https://fourbitfriday.itch.io/catacombkids

Topics:

• Ravens of Golden Gate Park
• Do you also want to destroy the moon? Or: What kind of supervillain are you
• Novation Circuit
• Domino Dancing
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ik2YF05iX2w
  • Unedited (syncable) commentary: https://youtu.be/u9gcW8sBgQ0

Microtopics:

• What exactly qualifies a collection of songs as an album.
• A solid Mastodon follow.
• Filling an album with songs until the CD is full.
• The ravens you pass on your walk every day.
• The guy in the brown vest who never does anything.
• CORVID-19.
• A raven who is extremely surprised that you don't have any food.
• The mask everyone has agreed to wear when it's time to go cruising for trouble with the crows.
• Wielding a cream pie so if you accidentally hit someone you are guaranteed to do 0 damage.
• The Mythbusters episode where they figure out how to drown someone with a pancake.
• Whittling down your hit points until you stub your toe and die.
• Hit points as a measure of your will to go on, so when someone hits you in the face with a pie it's a serious blow as you reconsider whether you're really cut out to be an adventurer.
• Bonus spleen damage.
• The half-dozen extra organs Space Marines have surgically grafted in for fighting. (But none for love.)
• Hit points representing individual vertebrae so when a high level Final Fantasy character has 999 HP that means they're basically a giraffe now.
• Secretly replacing the moon with a hologram of the moon.
• Fantasy settings where the moon is destroyed and strewn across the sky like the rings of Saturn.
• Whether it'd be less work to steal a moon of Mars or to retrieve Ceres to give our moon a nice sky companion.
• Aspirations of both destroying or romancing the moon.
• Accidentally pushing the supervillain button to destroy all cereal crops when you meant all cold cereals.
• Why they call them Grape Nuts.
• Back when it was a big deal that they baked these crackers using electric power.
• A tool that is worse at what it does than your laptop but has the advantage that you can't go on Twitter.
• Making 80s techno because you're not ready to make a twelve-tone Schoenberg piece.
• Wanting to make fun jams but not knowing how to play any instruments.
• A smooth sequencer workflow.
• Different ways to make a song.
• Getting a guitar so you can put guitar sounds in your music and then realizing that now you have to learn to play guitar.
• Reasons you might want to leave notes out of a chord.
• Leaving the bass notes out because the bass player is taking care of that.
• Nine note scales and eleven note scales and everything in between.
• Pushing the limits of your instrument beyond what it was intended for.
• The lived experience of wanting cool synthesizers in the 90s vs. In the 20s.
• Music equipment manufacturers realizing you could make a toy analog synthesizer and sell it for $200 and everyone would buy it because it's a cheap fun music toy.
• Putting a cpu in a plastic box and there's your synthesizer and all that's left is to add some buttons.
• Synth Lords.
• Two shirtless young men sitting by a tree.
• Whether conventionally attractive people can work in pet shops.
• Back in the 80s before it was legally mandated that musicians be extremely attractive.
• Tipping your silver hard hat and saying "milady."
• Smash cut to a Pet Shop Boy standing in the doorway and the audience gasps.
• How you would identify the Pet Shop Boys if not for the baseball caps saying "boy."
• Pet Shop Boyd.
• Return of the stripy shirts.
• Pet Shop Yinz.
• Two shirtless youths fighting in the ocean.
• Trying to start a fight while outdoors by saying "Do you want to take this to the beach? We can't take it outside because we're already outside! The beach is the outside of the outside! After that it goes to space! Do you want to take this to space?"
• Walking alone on the beach while your suitors wrestle in the ocean suggestively.
• Horses getting loose on set while you're filming a music video and getting in every shot.
• Error with an f.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday/
  • https://frror.bandcamp.com/releases
• Ryan
  • https://twitter.com/RyanIkeComposer
  • https://www.instagram.com/ryanikeaudio/

Topics:

• What do animals know? Do they know things? How do we find out?
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/What_Is_It_Like_to_Be_a_Bat%3F
• Can we all just be adults and admit that invisibility sucks as a superpower?
• Where is the machine learning startup promising to fix the concert videos where the audience claps on 1 and 3
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UinRq_29jPk
• Toxic by Britney Spears
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LOZuxwVk7TU
  • Unedited (syncable) commentary: https://youtu.be/x3eUVHdw54k
• What mundane tool/item/technology do you wish were irrelevant, and what would you replace it with?

Microtopics:

• Doing a perfect ollie your first time on a skateboard and then never skating again because you'll never top that.
• Cooking every single dish in the human culinary encyclopedia and then starving to death because you refuse to repeat yourself.
• Honor system rock paper scissors.
• Making video games, one of which is called Catacomb Kids.
• Naming your band one letter away from a common word so that your band is impossible to google.
• An extremely austere and dour change log, like in Great Expectations.
• Changing the "dragon breath" spell to "bear breath" because dragons aren't real but bears breathe fire.
• A grim window into the world in which we live, dragonless and dragon breath -less.
• A delicious treat for anyone who likes anise flavoring and salt.
• A giant human sized licorice in a wedding gown.
• Competing with nearby deer for the affections of the extremely salty licorice you're marrying.
• Spendinga lot of your mental energy trying to figure out animal cognition.
• Whether elephants worship the moon or in fact anything.
• Dogs doing the things dogs do even if they've never been taught by another dog.
• Where babies learn the things that their parents don't teach them.
• Babies smiling when they see a face even though they're not happy to see you.
• Baby reflexes that help parents bond with them during the time when they are hardest to love.
• How to be sure that animals think and feel and have memory when we can't even be sure for other humans.
• P-zombies.
• A dog's mental model of the world.
• The Far Side cartoon depicting a machine that translates dog barks into human speech.
• Whether animals have to know stuff.
• Meerkat accents.
• The mantis shrimp having an innate ability to see ghosts, and learning our language to tell us that we're stepping on ghosts all the time and we're covered in ectoplasm.
• A superpower that turns you invisible except for your eyes, so you're just a floating pair of eyeballs, not invisible at all, so you have to buy a pair of sunglasses to hide your eyes.
• Putting two of the lamest possible superpowers together in the same married couple.
• The lamest superpower that you would settle for.
• The superpower of getting up when the alarm rings and not having to hit snooze even once.
• The superpower of lactose tolerance.
• The superpower of having practiced a lot.
• Cutting a cantaloupe in half and the six of clubs is in there and the guy's like "yeah that's my card, but that cantaloupe was $9 at Whole Foods, thanks a lot."
• How to convince general audiences that they should care when in the measure to clap.
• Just assuming that audiences will be clapping in the wrong place so you add a single measure in 5/4 to your 4/4 composition to fix it.
• Playing a concert video where the video and audio are desynchronized by exactly half a measure.
• Inventing a snare drum that looks like a bass drum and vice versa, and filming a prank show where unsuspecting drummers play concerts with the inverted drum kit.
• Going to fiver and asking someone to build you a drum kit that defies science and logic.
• The one company that Topic Lords would accept sponsorship from.
• Stopping the concert when the audience starts clapping on 1 and 3 and asking them "come on, did you spend $126 to get it wrong?"
• Not finding out how low-poly these birds are until the quarter speed viewing.
• Which side Britney's nails look most amazing from.
• The outfit flight attendants had to wear in the 1950s, before they had the right to vote.
• A flight attendant with pauldrons.
• A loser with a sandwich that Britney wants to make out with in the bathroom.
• Seeing someone's ass and wondering what the Blippi subreddit would think of it.
• A dude who is a motorcycle.
• Biketaurs.
• Having the same facial expression as the motorcycle you're riding.
• A sparkly Jackson Pollock that you wrap around yourself.
• Stepping right in the laser.
• Warning the janitor that you're turning on the office's death ladder so he's not surprised when he shows up that weekend to find 15 corpses on the floor.
• A music video that is secretly the prequel to Jupiter Ascending.
• Whether this hot Scandinavian guy is the same guy as the last hot Scandinavian guy.
• Saving time shaving by dyeing your facial hair the same color as your skin.
• Whether a stiff iron bar jabbing into your back would improve a bed or a chair.
• Whether Britney Spears hallucinated the events of the Toxic video, and she's just an ordinary flight attendant.
• How to fix bread closures.
• Filling the moon with bread closures.
• Getting a bread box so people stop having to manufacture bread closures.
• How massive a bread is required to spin the bag at sufficient velocity to apply the bread closures.
• Solving your headphone cord problem by never listening to audio of any kind.
• Installing an ink sac in your fingernail so that you never have to look around for a pen.
• A tattoo of a squid that you can squeeze to spurt ink into the eyes of your enemies, but the tattoo gets more and more faded as the ink depletes.
• An awful thing that your ducks can do.
• What's going on in that biome?
• The horned lizard's final defense.
• Dropping a tail if you need to escape.
• A super ethical meat factory that spends all day terrifying the tails off of lizards.
• An avocado-like spread made out of frightened lizard tail.
• Nothing but adrenaline flavor in this tail.
• How to live as a freelancer without being drained of all your bodily fluids.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Tyriq
  • https://twitter.com/FourbitFriday
• Chris
  • https://twitter.com/MrChrisLHall

Topics:

• Revisiting Game Maker after 10 years, and getting right back into it
• What's your jrpg/anime vocal quirk?
• Electric showers
• Weval - Someday
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-wEvzqdDZg
• UNESCO Intangible Cultural Heritage Lists
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/UNESCO_Intangible_Cultural_Heritage_Lists

Microtopics:

• A game that has been in early access for 7,000 years.
• Coming back to software you last used a decade ago and finding that it has a night theme now.
• Old vs. new Game Maker.
• Knowing the context a word is borrowed from and assuming more meaning carried over than actually did.
• Terms that programming borrowed from philosophy, like "monad" and "blockchain."
• Function-shaped functions.
• Seeing people misuse a tool and trying to decide whether it'd be better to teach them how to use the tool, or make a new tool that works how they expect.
• That time someone tried to port Catacomb Kids to C++ before realizing that someone had been adding features to this game for ten years.
• The Dark Theme era.
• Jim just happening to know how many lines of code the Frog Fractions remaster is.
• How many lines of code is reasonable for an action roguelike that one person has worked on for ten years.
• Measuring code complexity by zipping it and looking at the file size.
• Designing the rules of a game to stop people from ruining it for themselves.
• How your laugh maps to your blood type.
• Deciding that when a character says "..." that means that they farted, and suddenly being able to enjoy Visual Novels.
• Whether Jay Gatsby saying "old sport" all the time is the same phenomenon as Moogles always saying "kupo."
• Typing in a swear word when an Animal Crossing character asks you for a new catchphrase and returning the cartridge to GameStop who will sell it to a small child and it'll end up on the local news.
• Incorporating goat noises into your speech in a subtle enough way that people aren't sure if you just made a goat noise.
• Everybody having their own weird noise that they made repeatedly instead of just having a face.
• Deciding that your signature isn't cool enough and hiring a signature designer to help you out.
• Whether "signature designer" is a real job you can make a living doing.
• Designing a different unique fart for every character in your JRPG so they each have a fart that fits your personality.
• Why making a fart noise with your tongue is called a "raspberry."
• How nobody can tell you've got a duck call under your COVID mask until it's too late.
• A showerhead plugged into a wall outlet.
• Heating water as it passes through the showerhead.
• Reassuring onlookers that you've been showering in an electric shower for decades and you've only been shocked a few times and you just have to not touch the metal plumbing.
• Wearing rubber shoes in the shower so the electric showerhead doesn't electrocute you.
• How nobody posting in the thread about electric showers has died.
• Electric showers waking you up even more effectively than regular showers.
• Not knowing what people want from things.
• Nuclear pacemakers.
• The number of nuclear pacemakers still in use today.
• Your nuclear pacemaker keeping your heart beating long after the rest of you has died.
• The Council of the Nuclear Hearts.
• Plugging your electric shower right into your nuclear heart.
• Electric flamethrowers.
• Lighting your cigarette with a tiny taser.
• 24 seconds of zooming in on the forest canopy.
• A video which is very dense with frames.
• A video which is exactly the kind of video that video codecs are be bad at encoding.
• Star Turns.
• A web site where people can repost your content uncredited and go viral.
• A guest accidentally unplugging their headphones followed by thirty seconds of "can you hear me? I can hear you."
• Standing on a floor that is painted to give you vertigo.
• Buildings that are cool in this video.
• Getting really excited every time you see aerial photography.
• Freeways.
• Starting with macro shots of urban environments and transitioning to wider shots of rural environments.
• Canopy shyness.
• Voronoi diagrams.
• Preserving aspects of human culture that don't take the form of a physical object.
• Intangible cultural heritage in need of urgent safeguarding.
• Intangible culture lost in the natural process of human becomingness.
• Whether history is worth knowing.
• A series of Duke Nukem strategy guides collected in the Library of Congress, rebound to look like a hardcover from the 1950s.
• What it takes to preserve a skill that a community of people practices over the course of their lives.
• Dance notation for very constrained types of dance.
• Tugging rituals.
• Avalanche risk management.
• Notation for bee dances.
• Dance notation which is just a list of where all the ping pong balls were.
• How every culture agrees that Kiki is the spiky one and Bouba is the round one.
• Wine horses.
• A very Western centric view of how many instruments have ever existed.
• How to make the number four out of only letters.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Elena is on the Topic Lords discord
• Tyriq is FourbitFriday everywhere
  • https://www.ckgame.net/

Topics:

• What's the youngest age at which you can become the kind of old person you want to be
• Reborrowings: https://starkeycomics.com/2020/06/06/reborrowings/
  • https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/624028907162566657/724080214128197672/etymologies-_1.png
  • https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%D1%81%D0%BB%D0%B0%D0%B2%D0%B0"
• I made pork katsu for dinner and Winston pronounced it "pork costume" and I'm pretty sure that's it, that's peak dad experience and it's all downhill from here
• Stephen asks "Textual dialects. Range of timbre and tools available in punctuation, capitalization, emphasis and emojis. Apparently periods come off as assertive/rude to younger folks."
• The tone deafness test
  • https://www.themusiclab.org/quizzes/td

Microtopics:

• Whether complice is the opposite of accomplice.
• Intending to clean the fridge.
• A short but sweet plug that you manage to drag out of your guest.
• Thinking an early access game is dead when the developer is right there in your kitchen streaming making breakfast.
• Feeling too young to just go around handing out Werther's Originals.
• Whether at some age all your teeth fall out or whether they just decided once, in the 1950s maybe, that it's time to pull everyone's teeth.
• Whether the lady with twenty cats accrued the cats over the course of your life or just adopted twenty cats at once.
• Learning to regrow your teeth so you can change your teeth style every few months, like you can your hair.
• Transhuman augmentation of the teeth.
• Being sure that a pop culture concept doesn't exist in Japan because you didn't see it in that one Yakuza game you played.
• Sharpening your teeth to look like a cat.
• The world record for most permanent transformations to look like an animal.
• Whether dead people can still be the fastest person in the world.
• The world record for most permanent transformations to look like something other than an animal.
• How Stalking Cat decided to become a cat.
• Wanting to be more like a tiger and having your ears transplanted to the top of your head.
• Getting a job as a programmer to fund your body modification plans so you can be the old person you dream about being.
• Running plastic tubes from the fake ears on top of your head down to the place your ears used to be.
• The major themes of Stalking Cat's LiveJournal.
• Seeing someone's LiveJournal post saying just "I start shooting today" and wondering if you should be worried.
• Getting back to being old.
• Cultivating the witchy vibe when you're not really a witch.
• Not having any enormous flowing skirts any more because you moved across the country and they all caught the wind and flew out of the back of the car.
• Making a skirt out of chainmail and refusing to twirl it because a four year old lives in your house.
• Asking the manufacturer of your favorite towel whether they make bathrobes and they send back a one word email saying "no."
• Wanting to look like a dapper old man but hating fashion norms.
• Appropriating the parts of fashion that you like while subverting the idea that you're participating in the fashion hierarchy.
• Wanting to eventually look like a dapper old man and starting by buying one dapper sock.
• Codpieces.
• Wearing full plate armor to church or to court.
• Stalking Cat's profile page on wikifur.com
• The Romans enslaving so many Slavs that Slav becomes their word for it.
• All the different times that nature has evolved a tree.
• Palm trees not really being trees and just being weird grass.
• A plant deciding to get tall where the sun is and reinventing wood.
• Languages borrowing words from other languages and then giving them back after completely changing the meaning.
• Whether Italy has any Pizza Huts.
• Trying to cover a song by a singer with a weird accent and discovering that you need that weird accent for the song to work and deciding if you're willing to adopt the weird accent for your cover.
• English poetry that is too old.
• A two year old pronouncing pork katsu as "pork costume."
• Dressing your two year old in pork for Halloween like the tiny ham he is.
• Really giving somebody the pork costume.
• Realizing your best work is behind you when you haven't done anything notable.
• An entirely sideways mouth that has fallen off your face.
• Chekov's Book.
• A throne but you can poop in it.
• Hiding a piece of matzo somewhere in your house on Passover and eventually your house fills up with matzo.
• Yelling at your coworker for only using the "slight smile" emoji because they weren't happy enough.
• Image searching for the Unicode character "slight smile" and seeing a field of smiley faces that are just the classic yellow smiley, but then there's one that's this smirking douchebag.
• How autocorrect ought to be able to code switch based on who you're talking to and what you're talking about.
• Walking around the house and discovering that you can't use the word "okay" in the kitchen.
• Putting the sparkles on top of the brain.
• Trying to talk about bringing your head below something and autocorrect is like "did you mean: fucking"
• Youtube's automatic captioning now censoring swear words.
• Censoring swear words by replacing the word "shit" with a picture of shit.
• Whether the eggplant emoji would ejaculate from the stem end or the bulb end.
• Squeezing mayonnaise out of the stem end of an eggplant emoji squeeze bottle.
• The tone deaf and the tone hearing.
• Being surprised to meet people who can't sing at all, even though you just met someone like that a couple days ago.
• Hearing a pitch and having no idea whether it's higher or lower than what you're singing.
• Not letting anyone into your painting club who can't distinguish red and green.
• Greyie Pie.
• Applying a deuteranopic filter to a My Little Pony episode and instantly being incredibly depressed.
• Not knowing the right answer but the person in your head heckling you does.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Ryan is @RyanIkeComposer on Twitter and @RyanIkeAudio on Instagram and is probably not working on Skyrim 2?
• Tyriq is FourbitFriday everywhere and really wants to finish Catacomb Kids.
  • https://www.ckgame.net/

Topics:

• What's a fandom you're not a part of, but kind of wish you were?
• Pointless Automatons
  • https://www.nytimes.com/2019/11/04/opinion/future-scooters-central-park.html
  • https://www.strandbeest.com/
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HitchBOT
  • http://www.tweenbots.com
• Please help reconstruct this lost pun: "vegan jazz standards" with nutritional yeast
• Mallow asks: "how do you grapple with / think about your legacy? (things that sprang to mind included the relevant timeframe, obligations to the future, how/what people inherit from their ancestors, and how (self-)censorship is a way to cut off a legacy)"
• Consistency of idiolect
  • Disfluencies providing value to the listener: http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/000300.html
• How can we appeal to Gen Z so when they take over we aren't executed along with the Boomers?

Microtopics:

• Clapping just because it's fun.
• A trainwreck of three people talking over each other.
• Being in a corridor and punching a weird alien.
• Topic thirst.
• Pokemon Snap making you even more of a pariah, if that's even possible.
• Throwing apples at a Snorlax until it wakes up, like the shitty kid at the zoo.
• A reverse body snatcher situation, where you're the only alien walking around in a skin suit.
• Enjoying a game more if it doesn't involve collecting things.
• Going to a free R&B concert every Sunday.
• Going to a white small town Lutheran church which was boring and lame.
• The organ coming in for particularly high-energy moments.
• Somebody telling you that you are inches away from going to hell in the same basement that they just had an alcoholics anonymous meeting four seconds ago.
• Having to worry about all your atheist friends going to hell.
• Non-Euclidean Christianity.
• Refusing to put anything in your ears to make the music be less music and going deaf for three days.
• Big moving contraptions that resemble some sort of life form made out of shafts of PVC that wander along the beaches.
• Having no purpose other than to exist.
• Having made so many things extinct that you feel obligated to fill the ecosystem with weird new robots.
• Sentient scooters running wild in New York City.
• An adorable robot that can only roll forward and relies on passers-by to navigate.
• Automations existing wholly outside of the human sphere.
• A battlebot that got loose in the forest, a ramp rolling around the forest floor flipping over pinecones.
• Wanting to believe that battlebots are real so badly that you forget that they have RC drivers.
• A robot with a nuke or at least a flail.
• A village of Rube Goldberg machines triggering each other forever.
• Listing jazz standards except replacing one of the words in each title with "nooch."
• One of those jokes that you construct for 17 people to get, but those 17 people really appreciate it.
• Slipping in the shower and the last thought in your head before you die is the game of the jazz standard that makes the best nooch pun.
• Not being sure whether an answer to your question is possible but proceeding under the assumption that it is.
• Not allowing yourself to die until you know the answer.
• Carrying around the answer to your life's question in your wallet so whenever you're ready to die you can read it and the paramedics will find you crumpled on the floor holding a note that just says "The Girl From Ipanoocha."
• Just wanting to be a person who has a finished game.
• Being driven to finish your current project so you can start the next one.
• Realizing that just because you made a promise to finish one project, you're allowed to do other things too.
• The projects that anyone can come in and finish vs. the projects that will die with you.
• Not having the attention span to finish a big project unless you owe it to somebody.
• Having some realizations right here on the podcast.
• Convincing yourself that the thing you want to do can fit as part of your larger project.
• Making music and never playing it for anybody because you're just making music because you enjoy it.
• All the great artists of the past having had a record label or a church they were beholden to.
• Michelangelo just deciding "this ceiling looks wack, I'm gonna fix it."
• Thinking of your unpublished works as increasing your posthumous clout.
• Putting your unpublished works in the attic because that's where people find posthumous art.
• Selling one album to somebody in New Jersey in your twelve year music career.
• Starting a patreon for people who want to support your main work and putting only unrelated works behind the patreon paywall.
• Uploading yourself to the cloud and making jam games forever for an audience of nobody.
• Adopting new phrases into your lexicon and letting other ones vanish.
• Adopting the vocal mannerisms and vocabulary of people you hang out with.
• Needing a phrase that means "diggity dang" but replacing each one after six months as you get sick of it.
• Talking to someone who doesn't use "umm" or "like" and instead just pauses for the same amount of time, and never being sure if they're done talking or if they are about to headbutt you.
• So-called "disfluencies" like "umm" and "uh" providing value to the listener in that they signify that the upcoming idea is more complex.
• Why everyone talked so fast in the early 20th century.
• Op-eds from Victorian times complaining about how young women are constantly saying "prithee" and "perchance" now.
• Needing the revolution to start soon because the boomers are about to die of old age and then the guillotine falls squarely on Gen X.
• Boomers writing op-eds about how Gen Z hates Gen X and millennials too, in hopes of inventing a generational divide that they're not on the wrong side of.
• Giving the next generation instructions on how and why to destroy you.
• The age segregation in the American school system resulting in most people knowing only people their own age for much of their lives.
• Cultural generations shortening as cultural change speeds up, until twins born minutes apart are on opposite sides of a war.
• Starting an Instagram to try to connect with the kids.
• College costing either zero or infinity dollars depending on the letter your last name starts with.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Jenni is on an internet break but you can email her at jenni@jennipolodna.com.
• Tyriq is @fourbitfriday on Twitter and elsewhere, and is making Catacomb Kids. https://www.ckgame.net/

Topics:

• 2:13 Hot Topic
  • "Peaches, meet your fate!" https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/blna2q/hot_topic_employees_of_reddit_what_are_your/emqprnc/
• 8:28 Toe picks
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_56TYtCggc
  • Mike Vallely yells at Tony Hawk about pressure flips. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQCe6guSOOM
  • A more detailed take on what happened with inlining and the X-Games. https://www.reddit.com/r/rollerblading/comments/1jpost/why_hasnt_rollerblading_come_back_to_the_xgames/cbhemrd/
• 22:15 Topical medication
• 30:42 Groke asks: "My friend (who is completely unaware of this podcast and did this apropos of nothing) emailed the Mars chocolate company to find out why the Topic candy bar has that name. 'Dear Mr Smith, Thanks for getting in touch about our MARS product. The Topic bar has been a firm favourite since it's introduction in 1962, unfortunately over time the origin of how the Topic chocolate bar came to be called Topic has been lost and now it has become a mystery that we are still trying to discover. If you need any more information, please let us know.'"
• 34:45 Test of Proficiency in Korean
  • Nifflas's braille labeling purchase snafu. https://twitter.com/Nifflas/status/1230232736734031878
  • Constructed scripts. https://www.omniglot.com/conscripts/english.htm
  • Nicaraguan sign language. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nicaraguan_Sign_Language
• 49:36 Topic Records

Microtopics:

• Listening to a lot of dolphin podcasts.
• Discussing only topics on the Topic Special.
• Belching instead of answering the question.
• Your project going well lately and being slightly less afraid that it's going to be awful.
• A store that isn't in your local mall so you have to drive half an hour to the cool mall.
• Being afraid cool teenagers will stare you down and you'll evaporate on the spot.
• A store selling pop culture stuff you've actually heard of.
• Not having a Hot Topic story but telling one you read on the Internet.
• An anime version of Ben Stiller's character from Reality Bites.
• The Hot Topic in Ben Stiller's thought bubble that you can only shop at if Ben Stiller thinks of you.
• All food vanishing from the world because Ben Stiller has thought of it all and it's trapped in his mind.
• All the wiki pages that popped up for the movie Primer.
• Having sorted the spreadsheet and being unable to un-sort the spreadsheet.
• Thinking toe picks are a gross hygiene thing but actually they're for doing a triple lutz.
• Amputee guitarists who are pretty proficient at foot guitaring.
• Skates with four wheels in a rectangle being way less cool than skates with four wheels in a row because that's what girls do.
• Ice skates being harder to turn in than inline skates, because they cut a groove in the surface.
• Turning on the toe pick.
• Sucking at tourism because nothing interests you.
• Changing the subject to Tony Hawk's Pro Skater.
• Which indie game developers were previously pro inline skaters.
• Mike Vallely storming off angrily at the concept of doing pressure flips.
• A kickflip except you don't make the ollie motion with your front foot, you just kick the tail down and scoop it forward with your rear foot.
• Tony Hawk being cool and teaching you vert tricks and Mike Vallely refusing to talk to anyone who isn't a skateboarder.
• Skateboarders getting petty and insecure and getting inline skating removed from the X-Games.
• Completing the entire gap checklist in Tony Hawk 2 and putting it on your resume.
• Dropping the franchise completely after Tony Hawk 2 because the Playstation 1 version of Tony Hawk 3 doesn't have female custom skaters.
• The mission in Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2 where you follow a homeless person around Venice Beach and harass him until he leaves town.
• Ollie the Magic Bum getting good at skateboarding so he can exact revenge.
• A full-contact, Tony-Hawk-And-Bully-Had-A-Baby roller derby game.
• Punxsutawney Phil looking down and seeing poop and so there'll be six more weeks of poop.
• Having to shove pills down a cat's throat twice a day for the rest of her life.
• Giving away your spare geckos and explaining to the recipient that they eat sunlight.
• A gecko eating another gecko like a corncob because they're not social animals after all.
• Three creatures each nesting-dolled in the mouth of another creature.
• The vet seemingly not knowing about lizards shedding when they put the cast on the lizard.
• The gecko still being alive so you're doing okay at pet ownership.
• Hiring a nurse that is also a gecko to take care of your gecko injections.
• A mystery that we are still trying to discover.
• Even the manufacturer not knowing why the candy bar is called Topic.
• Inventing the jaw that can take the smallest possible bite.
• Marzipan but with almonds.
• Not liking how they pronounce "urinal" in the UK. Not liking it at all.
• Things taking a dark turn and someone turning up dead.
• Not going out of your way to inform people that your product's name is shockingly racist.
• Preferring the language proficiency test that is more similar to Skee-Ball.
• Changing the subject to Tony Hawk's Pro Skater again.
• Wanting to feel sick about everything and doing all the missions at "sick" difficulty.
• Doing a few missions at "sick" difficulty and deciding that's enough sick for you.
• The Korean alphabet having been invented by a dude who thought ideograms were a bad idea.
• Borrowing ideograms from Chinese and then later going back for more.
• Nifflas inventing his own alphabet so doesn't have to hide his notes when he DMs.
• The process of training yourself to read your weirdo moon-man alphabet.
• Wanting to get into Lojban.
• Liking a phrase as much as Tolkien likes "cellar door."
• Inventing the language that magic is spoken in.
• Inventing a language for your game and demanding your players become fluent in it.
• The Nicaraguan school for deaf children doing a terrible job at teaching deaf children, but the children inventing Nicaraguan Sign Language.
• Collecting your paycheck for doing nothing.
• A corpus of industrial folk songs.
• Yelling "peaches meet your fate!" and making the chainsaws kiss.
• Mother-32 needing an offering of your hair every morning.
• The composition process you enjoy most not leading to the kind of music you enjoy most.
• Not wanting to make prototypes in the final medium because working in the final medium is a pain to work in.
• GML being the wax and 6502 assembly being the marble in this analogy.
• Live streaming video to the Apple II.
• Having time for hobbies because you quit Twitter.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Tyriq is working on video games including Catacomb Kids: https://fourbitfriday.itch.io/catacombkids and has a Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/FourbitFriday
• Avery still made that solo album. https://averyburke.bandcamp.com/releases

Topics

• 5:12 Reading non-religious texts as scripture.
  • Harry Potter and the Sacred Text. http://www.harrypottersacredtext.com/
  • Orphans of the Sky. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orphans_of_the_Sky
  • Generation Ships. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Generation_ship
  • Water. https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Water
  • Wookieepedia has removed Poggle the Greater so I guess their editors are just as serious-business as Wikipedia's.
  • Video Game Advisor. https://twitter.com/VGAdvisor
• 18:13 I just found out that "pitched battle" means "pitch" as in "sales pitch" as opposed to "fever pitch."
  • Pitched battle on Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pitched_battle
  • Pitched battle on Merriam Webster. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/pitched%20battle
• 24:01 How do you really use carrier pigeons?
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homing_pigeon
  • Pigeon racing. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pigeon_racing
• 32:05 Larry asks: "Which ship is the best one?"
  • Earthships. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Earthship
  • Dyson spheres. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dyson_sphere
  • Is it Hogwarts or just Britain? https://www.reddit.com/r/harrypotter/comments/ajmpqi/nonbritish_harry_potter_fans_what_are_some_things/
• 40:53 One of two ways of doing a thing.
• 52:17 The switch in ancient Greece from clothed to naked sports.

Microtopics:

• Taking a bite out of a cartoon bird and leaving a tooth-shaped hole, like a cookie.
• Empire Records now being more real than Tower Records.
• Not remembering record stores.
• Mowing your face into a lawn made of tiny green clones of you.
• Trusting that in a couple years your record will be classic enough that dads will want it for Christmas.
• Trying to glean philosophy and life lessons out of the Bible even if you don't believe it's real.
• Trying to glean philosophy and life lessons out of Harry Potter even if you don't believe it's real.
• Star Wars being more real than Tower Records.
• Mixing methamphetamines and marriage.
• Language changing to mean the thing people misunderstand it to mean.
• Drinking tea and watching war as if it's a sport.
• Wearing enormous flags so people can see at a glance how the battle is going.
• Pantsed and unpantsed meaning the same thing.
• The union of shells and the union of unshelledness.
• The dude whose job it is to take homing pigeons away from home.
• Homing pigeons basically being a rubber band.
• Defcon attendees hacking the pigeon timestamp machine to win the pigeon race.
• Buying a signed shot polisher from the guy who won the International Barista Championships.
• Going to the barista gym up keep your skills up between barista gigs.
• Coming back from your barista sabbatical and discovering all coffee is now made in node.js.
• Not letting anyone else use the espresso machine you convinced management to pay for.
• Being both a barista and a bard at GitHub.
• Singing to GitHub employees a tale of the GitHub CEOs valor.
• The Roman alphabet existing in the Star Wars universe.
• Being a huge fan of Dyson spheres.
• Shamefully burying your fanfic in the desert, like E.T.
• Wanting to live in a pile of garbage.
• Wanting to live in a desert house, but not in the desert itself.
• Forming complex structures using simple rules.
• Wizards just pooping on the ground and magicking it away.
• Being furious when someone peels a banana wrong.
• Orienting your toilet paper so it's harder for cats to unroll.
• Cats sticking their paws under the door.
• Being sad because the doors are too flush with the ground for a cat paw to say hi.
• Bringing your guitar case to lure your cat admirer away from you.
• Waking up screaming about raccoons.
• A cat's ability to form a mental model of the world.
• Unloading the front door from memory when you get to the second floor.
• Never getting the dog you wanted so you get an iguana instead.
• Waking up snuggling a cold handbag.
• Whether lizards snuggle with sleeping deer in the wild.
• Earnestly proposing a Utopia ruled by you and your friends.
• Doing the Olympics naked being a week-long fad at best.
• Soccer fandoms gaining political power and going to war with one another.
• Soccer's popularity fading immediately after its invention, being just one of millions of microsports.
• Going into the wrestling pit with a spring loaded revolver up your sleeve.
• Voting somebody off the island of Earth.
• Biting open your cell phone tooth and the liquid going into a mold in your stomach shaped like a cell phone and pooping out a cell phone.
• There also being a mold for a cell tower in your stomach.
• Being qualified to gatekeep a culture because you once dated someone of that culture.

Support Topic Lords