Lords:

• Mara
  • https://twitter.com/McaelinL
• April
  • https://twitter.com/aprilsaur/

Topics:

• Frog and Toad core
• What would you do with a bonus room in your house?
• My reptile brain is a cat-loving ninja
• If you could submit one thing (a song, a building, a food, an activity, an abstract concept) to the interstellar community of sapient intelligences as your part of The Case For Why The Human Race Is Good And Cool, what would it be?
• How earnest lessons you try to teach your children backfire
• Murder She Wrote is back on prime
• Asafoetida powder

Microtopics:

• The Expanse: bigger than before.
• A developer's guide to cognitive behavioral therapy.
• The various circumstances under which the Frog Fractions DLC hat can be a witch hat.
• Cottagecore vs. Frog and Toad core.
• Cottagecore merged with an old man.
• Embracing Frog and Toad for pride month.
• Finding the bodice rippers with people with dark curly hair on the cover because you can imagine those are light-skinned black people.
• The relative density of the east coast.
• Getting out of California before it's too late.
• A complete dearth of natural disasters.
• Writing an offer letter for a home you want to buy and mentioning your adorable child who just needs a home several times.
• Moving into a space that is twice as big and not knowing what to do with all the space.
• An Austenian fantasy you have been cherishing in your bosom.
• A perfect cosy library with chairs that trap people.
• Installing a ladder on casters so you can ride it around the room every morning in your Belle outfit.
• Coming up with excuses to install the ladder on casters even though you can just reach up and grab every book in your library.
• One of those booths with a fan at the bottom that you fill by ripping a single page out of every book in your library.
• How much extra you can charge for an Airbnb hidden behind a secret bookshelf.
• Going into the Library of Congress to check out Bullfrog's Official Guide to Dungeon Keeper.
• A room full of music production equipment and no internet connection.
• Asking your child to focus at dinner when all the adults at the table have their phones out.
• Saving a cat by applying torque to a falling chair.
• Doing a thing before you realize you've done it and thinking "wow it's a good thing I agree with those actions."
• Deliberately relying on your unconscious mind to do important work.
• Whether Jim and his wife need to get checked for ADHD.
• A teen who can write a hell of a term paper.
• The interstellar community of sapient intelligences.
• The case for why the human race is good and cool.
• Winnie the Pooh.
• Reclaiming the poop.
• Taco Bell's cannon firing nacho cheese chalupas at the enemy spaceships.
• Trying to convey "hygge" without being willing to try to pronounce it.
• Learning about alien cultures by watching Star Trek.
• A five year old explaining to you how T-Mobile are leaders in 5G technology.
• A perfectly sensible reaction to the story of Noah's Ark.
• Learning what fighting is and deciding to fight your mom.
• A book about a child who needs to be reprimanded all the time.
• Shouting "no" and throwing the phone on the floor whenever an ad plays.
• Watching Murder She Wrote every night before bed.
• Jessica Fletcher the serial killer and her nephew Grady, also a serial killer.
• How good Jessica Fletcher would be at breaking up a loud graduation party.
• Predicting when the party next door is going to end by the decade the music is from.
• How to recognize a trap remix of the Murder She Wrote theme from just the bass.
• Tricking your family into playing the Murder She Wrote board game.
• Not needing a wedding ring because your husband got you the Murder She Wrote DVD boxed set.
• Discovering what DVDs are and deciding to put them in the shower.
• Covering the shower drain with the Wii Sports disc because they're the exact same size.
• A bone-dry shower.
• Always shirt-cocking it.
• Baby poop and onions but also kind of floral but also you hate onions.
• Resorch.
• Dried latex from the celery family.
• Boiling your neti pot water to kill the brain-eating bacteria that might pass through the blood brain barrier.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Mara plugs Libby. https://libbyapp.com/welcome
  • maracaelin@gmail.com
• Derek plugs LibriVox. https://librivox.org/
  • https://twitter.com/derekcaelin
  • https://mastodon.technology/@argus

Topics:

• Should we spare our children from our own game nostalgia?
• Working libraries of famous people getting acquired by institutions
• Winston's latest thing is that before peeing in the potty he'll find a hairball on the floor and put it in the potty so he can pee on it
• John asks "In watching my 3 year old develop her own sense of comedy I have realized that comedy might actually be a kind of innate human reaction to interesting incongruity. She likes toilet humor quite a lot despite my partner and I never liking those kinds of jokes. However, I think she likes it because it's very easy for her to understand something like singing 'Happy Birthday to Poop!' whereas other subtler kinds of humor are out of her reach right now."
• Toddlers who secretly compete in pro-gaming tournaments

Microtopics:

• Libby.
• A really good way to use your public library without leaving your house.
• Getting one of those hollowed out books from a Poirot novel where the vial of poison goes except you put your phone in there so people think you're reading books rather than looking at your phone.
• Librivox.
• Listening to some randos reading public domain books.
• Square jawed scientists taking on the world and neither the government nor their frail wives can hold them back.
• Trying to show your four year old Wind Waker and he's annoyed that it's not the Wind Waker remaster for Wii U.
• Subtly guiding your child away from games that prey on gambling addiction.
• Planning a closed environment where you can introduce the history of video games to your child in chronological order, and then realizing that that's how we got modern gamers.
• How to revisit your nostalgia when it's locked inside early Macintosh educational games with bad emulation support.
• Wandering isolated in a sad soundscape.
• Whether World of Warcraft caused your depression or whether losing your job (because of World of Warcraft) caused your depression.
• Eve Online.
• Going into nullsec where there is no sec.
• Forgetting about Eve Online for ten years and coming back to find that your avatar has been practicing whittling cedar this entire time and is now a grandmaster cedar whittler.
• Going to turning left school for five years.
• Collecting all the books in a famous author's working library so scholars can catalogue all the Cheeto fingerprints.
• Studying the working library of the greatest American novelist of all time and it's just autographed copies of all the Twilight novels and the board game "Wits and Wagers."
• Filling your working library with books to impress the scholars studying your life in a hundred years.
• Giving your source code to the Video Game History Foundation for safe keeping.
• The difficulty of preserving the history of online video games.
• Whether an economy based on trading nudes can sustain your video game preservation endowment.
• That time of year when Wikipedia is begging for the nudes again.
• Toilet Mimics
• Whether you have to pee on Cheerios or whether any cereal will do.
• A man's irrepressible need to piss on a fly.
• Monetizing urination.
• The alternate reality where all video games are controlled by a stream of urine, and some fringe developers are making games you control with your hands, and people are like "Is that even a game? You don't even piss on it!"
• Being cornered at a party by an inventor describing his idea for a toilet seat that vibrates at the brown note.
• The brown note as a consent issue.
• All-singing, all-dancing, all-peeing.
• Calling your mom on the toilet phone so she can whistle at the frequency that makes you pee.
• Two-factor authentication for pooping.
• When you can't poop because your smart toilet can't connect to the wifi.
• Toilet uptime.
• Every child independently inventing the "happy birthday to poop" song.
• Singing "happy birthday to poop" when the poop has no way to blow out the candles.
• The fecal stage of the Freudian theory of child development.
• The calculus of why we don't find the same joke funny again.
• A gingerbread house that is an architect's nightmare.
• Adults and children making jokes past each other.
• Pete of the Chickens.
• Four year olds who are incredibly good at Rocket League.
• Swearing that you are only four years old so Epic doesn't kick you out of the Rocket League League.
• How physics-driven video games are the perfect constrained environment for a child to excel in.
• Whether your Rocket League skills translate to any other aspect of your life.
• A four year old gamer complaining about noobs.
• Saying "don't forget to like comment and subscribe" instead of "goodbye."
• Being leery of playing video games because every time you touch a controller the truck video stops.
• Texting your grandmother a thousand emojis.
• An app that lets your four year old pretend to text his grandma a thousand emojis.
• Your true self on the Fediverse.
• The realest person on Mastodon.

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