• Erica
• Judy
  • https://www.tiktok.com/@diluftmensch
  • https://www.tumblr.com/diluftmensch
  • https://bsky.app/profile/diluftmensch.bsky.social

Topics:

• The Pantone college experience
• Why is everyone with superpowers a crime fighter or a criminal
• Sell me on metal utensils
• Grand Avenue, by Ron Koertge
  • https://writersalmanac.publicradio.org/index.php%3Fdate=2014%252F10%252F19.html
  • Abridged version: https://allpoetry.com/poem/14373111-Grand-Avenue-by-Ronald-Koertge
• Toothpaste is traditionally spicy

Microtopics:

• Just Judy.
• Telling your friends you love them.
• Taking a break from the Internet and staring at the ceiling.
• Realizing you need to take a break and then trying to figure out what you need to take a break from.
• Doing absolutely nothing for ten minutes.
• People who enjoy meditation explaining that you just need to meditate harder.
• Taking a depressing game and remaking it, reframing it as relaxing.
• Tetromino Chill.
• Asking "do I have the flu?" in French.
• Clicking on a wav file of Sleepwalk by Santo and Johnny and thinking "computer music is cool"
• Your college's particular shade of purple.
• The proliferation of this exact shade of purple now that Pantone has made it possible to exactly reproduce a color.
• The reason why can't we tell who's buff and sexy any more.
• Going to college to get sick of a particular color.
• Whether any place is as intensely branded as a college campus.
• What the founding fathers would think of this college campus' branding.
• James Madison inventing the signature duplicator.
• James Madison insisting that his entire family sleep sitting up.
• Colors that you can't use until you really mean it.
• Colors that are not allowed in the bathroom.
• Pantone inventing a way to pee any known color.
• Boom Box Guy.
• The professor with the glasses with two different color lenses who is constantly complaining about JMU Purple.
• Having jaws strong enough to eat bones and eating way more bones than you used to.
• Topics that have been in the bucket since the inception of the bucket.
• Unlimited energy. (Not limited energy.)
• Why isn't Superman using his x-ray vision to watch TV better than anyone?
• Lois Lane wearing superman's shirt.
• Using your x-ray vision to make sure ant colonies aren't siphoning money out of bank vaults.
• Advising strangers on the street that they have an untreated medical condition and they're like "go away creep"
• The spoon doing a catapult move because the handle is too heavy, and flinging chili everywhere.
• Plastic utensils for adults.
• Hitting the age when doctors start saying things like "let's see if we can get a couple more good years out of you"
• Whether the fork ever touches your tongue.
• Ceramic spoons.
• Melamine, the plastic material manufactured on Alf's home planet.
• Handsome Korean wooden spoons.
• Just slurping down a whole bowl of guacamole.
• Everyday Carry Forks.
• Metal utensils: so good, you carry them around.
• Trying to eat a leaf of lettuce with an extremely heavy fork.
• Eating a meal with a pickaxe and a pronged shovel.
• Turning the corner by Señor Fish.
• Different ways to kil for somebody.
• A punch-line that was not set up in the descriptive part of the poem.
• A poem that is a subset of another poem.
• Where is the wacky misunderstanding that I was promised?
• A bumper sticker reading "you just got passed by a bad driver (AI)"
• Slapping the "artificial intelligence" label on everything you write so people blame AI.
• Cinnamon toothpaste and ginger toothpaste.
• Conventionally spicy toothpaste.
• Toothpaste that doesn't taste like anything. (You know, for cats!)
• Spicy tuna toothpaste and black pepper toothpaste.
• Rinsing your mouth with lemon cleanser so your mouth can feel lemon fresh.
• Pure Piperin.
• Tubes: they're for squeezing.
• Phosphoric acid toothpaste.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Jude
  • https://bikechurch.santacruzhub.org/
  • https://www.linkedin.com/in/jude-jackson-605680100/
• Shepard

Topics:

• The attention schema model of consciousness
  • https://books.google.com/books?id=Ta4eAAAAQBAJ&pg=PP1
• Studying a children's picture book in academia because it was successfully banned out of existence
• Your favorite floor cocktail
• Ode to Waluigi
  
  • https://www.stalberttoday.ca/local-news/student-poet-wins-national-award-1278635
• Did generations used to be a thing?
• Remembering what the mnemonic is but not what it is supposed to remind you.

Microtopics:

• Bike Church.
• Learning to fix a bike.
• The audio book for Watership Down.
• The book that inspired the plugging.
• Our own brain's mental model of our attention.
• If you are what you think then suddenly you're this other thing.
• The brain's proprioception of itself.
• The Turning Test as praxis.
• A second brain that tries to second-guess the first brain.
• An idea that is brilliant or not.
• Have machine learning researchers heard about having kids?
• X: A Child's Story.
• A discount dystopian nightmare.
• A book that is banned in twenty states but otherwise nobody cares about it.
• Kids who inexplicably look like Charles Bronson.
• The consolidation of media into six megacorporations.
• Kids learning how to pirate again.
• A specific right that can be sold or exchanged.
• The end of the golden age of streaming.
• What Napster was like.
• Downloading an MP3 from an FTP site and then recording it to a cassette tape because you don't have that much hard drive space.
• Ice that is still ice.
• When the bartender pours your drink on the floor and gives you a straw.
• The Forbidden Jungle Juice.
• A story from back when most of Jim's friends were alcoholics.
• Noticing a cocktail on the floor of the elevator and wondering how it got there and then you realize the elevator smells like a smoke bomb and you're like "oh ok"
• Checking the ceiling of the elevator for ninjas.
• The problem with the wine bar spit urn.
• The coffee that you give to the poor.
• Pouring your excess coffee into the donation box at church.
• Dropping a loose muffin into the mail drop box to show thanks to the mail carrier.
• A floor made of mail.
• A dastardly Nintendo villain.
• Thy time to attack Mario and Luigi.
• Why thou dost not have thine own video fame.
• Why thou art always cranky.
• Whether a power flower fell in you mouth when thou wast a baby.
• What it wouldst be like to be friends with Bowser and thou.
• Fighting Geno the Explorer dangerously.
• Why thou art not in Super Smash Bros. Brawl.
• A poem that asks many important questions and provides no answers.
• Hyper Mecha Sonic.
• A thriller about video game mascots.
• The bright line in the sand that makes Yoshi a pet rather than a friend.
• Dumping your boyfriend Waluigi any time you need an extra few feet of jump height because at any time you can load up Mario Tennis and get another Waluigi for free.
• Trying desperately to find or create a purple-moustachioed Waluigi.
• The eight named generations.
• The Reprisal Generation, of the Nomad/Reactive archetypes.
• Why the concept of generational cohorts is unique to modern Americans.
• Ming Dynasty Boomers.
• Violence that is continuous and normal.
• The Greatest Generation, who had no idea at the time how Great they had it.
• A Radical for Fingers.
• Seeing a king wearing a hat and trying to remember what that's supposed to remind you of.
• Looking at your hands and trying to remember why this is important.
• Not figuring out that your grandpa is hilarious until a week before he dies.
• Waiting in the bathroom for the test to start.

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