• Abby
  • https://www.thespaceuk.com/shows/2025/abby-denton-my-favorite-loser
• Sid
  • https://linktr.ee/beamsplashx

Topics:

• Reading about type 1 diabetes
• Saying vegetables instead of cussin'
  • https://jp.itch.io/mr-friendly
• Winston punched his tooth out
• If I Ran the Circus (excerpt)
• With the power of portable PS2 emulation, I can find out how many types of games I don't like anymore

Microtopics:

• My Favorite Loser.
• Mistakes we always keep in the show because it's more fun that way.
• How to plagiarize video using Da Vinci Resolve.
• A tool that automatically turns any Youtube video into a series of screenshots with captions.
• Your mom threatening to sell your copy of Sonic the Hedgehog when it's explicitly labeled "not for resale"
• Explaining to your mom that they're not video games, they're computer games, and she explains that video is from the Latin for "to see"
• Mom paying proper deference to your clever sass before grounding you.
• They're called RPGs, Mother!
• Reading just enough about diabetes to be unhelpful.
• Reading the diabetes owners manual.
• Your $200/month Glucagon habit.
• The Quick Start Guide to Diabetes, which explains that ideally you'd do such and such for your diabetic child but you probably don't have health insurance so, uh, good luck!
• WiFi 7 upgrading you to gay.
• Recreational glucose monitors.
• The new glucose tablets coming in metric and confusing everybody.
• That time Solid Snake went hypoglycemic while being tortured and bit down on his fake tooth to release the glucose capsule.
• We put sugar gel in you, Solid Snake! It's going to make you slightly loopy!
• An accountant who likes jogging.
• Nobody knows why women have a higher incidence of eating disorders. If only we could ask them
• They made a cure to diabetes 30 years ago, but you have to become the President of the United States to get it.
• If Diabetes is so good, why haven't they made a Diabetes 2?
• The Quick Start Guide to Diabetes explaining that people with diabetes can talk over you in a funny voice and you're not allowed to do anything about it.
• Fiddling with a bloodletting device in an antique store and accidentally letting nearly all of your blood.
• Phlegmletters.
• What part of the body hurts least to prick with a needle. (The balls.) (Of your feet.)
• Code switching halfway through explaining how you like to cuss.
• How to swear at someone using vegetables.
• What a load of parsnips!
• Brussels Sprouts patch notes.
• Brussels Sprouts: Belgium's Great Shame.
• Winnipeg Manitoba sprouts.
• Walking up to a stranger on the street and saying "Hey! It's a load of parsnips!" when they don't even know how you feel about parsnips.
• Veggie Tales: Christ Died for our Parsnips.
• Finding hilarious jokes in the text but your Bible studies group doesn't think they're very funny at all.
• Refusing to apologize about a joke because someone somewhere is going to get the joke.
• Why they still play old cartoons when they have Dragon Ball Z now.
• Trying to find the 90s show about a kid trapped in a sitcom neighborhood that a talking dog told Abby about.
• A video game where instead of having to shoot people, you talk to people.
• Mr. Friendly.
• Running errands for the demons.
• Demon acceptance.
• Can you believe Satan? What will they come up with next?
• Lucifer Twocifer: Bringer of the Deuce.
• Embarking on a multi-year project to have the coolest most clever minced oaths because you refuse to have basic minced oaths.
• Whether it's racist to call a safecracker a Yegg.
• The funniest joke you heard when you were eight.
• The hobo with excellent glycemic index who lives in your shed.
• Trying cat insulin and promising to report back if you die.
• Hyperdontia.
• Accidentally swallowing a tooth and growing a tooth tree in your tummy.
• Explaining to your kid who just swallowed a tooth that it's going to bite him on the butt on the way out.
• Inventing an increasingly elaborate series of fairies that cover everything that can happen to your child's teeth
• What kind of degree you need to become a tooth fairy.
• Going to the dentist to do a bunch of drugs and get punched in the face.
• The tooth fairy talking about switching careers.
• Paying for PDFs to print and put under your child's pillow when they lose a tooth.
• Trying to pay a mortgage on a tooth fairy's salary nowadays.
• What you're going to make Mr. Sneelock do.
• A hoodwink who can't wink good.
• If only we could talk to the LAPD.
• Looking up the IPA pronunciation of Truffula Trees.
• Anticipating the day you'll finally get to say "what it is"
• Reading The Lorax in a bad David Lynch impression.
• Over Forty Years of Trusted Quality at Nature's Bounty.
• Seeing yourself on video and realizing you've been on the autism spectrum the whole time.
• Knowing your friend only has one joke and telling a whole shaggy dog story to set up the one joke, as a gift.
• The zoomers that they have nowadays.
• Hello, this is my Asian man voice.
• Going around the circle and everybody doing their best Asian man voice, finishing with the guy you want cancelled the most.
• Spending $150 trying to connect your PlayStation 2 to a modern television.
• Exhorting people to read the jokes in your pinned tweets.
• Importing PS3 games – or not importing them, which is cheaper.
• All the things you could've done instead of shooting Shinzo Abe.
• Playing Tenchu: Wrath of Heaven and trying to change the control scene to be more like Sekiro, even though you hated Sekiro.
• Freaking out because you didn't have everything figured out by the time you're 24.
• Playing Bumpy Trot with your weeb girlfriend.

Support Topic Lords

• Abby
  • https://www.hollywoodfringe.org/projects/10813
• Pat
  • https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/hyperheartcom/gotchacards

Topics:

• The pear scene
• Capsule machines vs. claw games
• Designing UIs for TV
• This be the Verse, by Philip Larkin
  • https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/48419/this-be-the-verse

Microtopics:

• My Brother the Car.
• A card game that is not totally random.
• Deciding to focus on something else in 2020.
• Rock Paper Scissors vs. Rock Scissors Paper.
• Which of the twins to take a kidney from
• Committing to a bit that breaks the rhythm of what people expect you to say.
• Making a game where people get crushed by debt but making it fun.
• Everybody Loves Raymond.
• Sitcoms that have plenty of opportunity to disappoint you.
• A show that lives and dies in the performance.
• Nine years to stop trying.
• The most profitable sitcom of all time.
• Adapting Raymond.
• Ray Romano explaining the concept of having parents to a puzzled audience.
• The kind of argument where both people make sense and are both trying to be nice.
• Trying to be nice but failing.
• 'Til Death.
• The demeanor of a revenant.
• Whether Brad Garrett listens to this show.
• Hitting 100 episodes and going into syndication.
• Musicians needing a body that can strike.
• Writing an increasingly ludicrous sitcom for an audience of nobody.
• A son who is always on the wacky tobacky.
• A sitcom husband who notices that his wife has been recast and realizes he's on a sitcom.
• Continuing to give Brad Garrett chances to star in sitcoms because he's so tall.
• A sitcom that made you feel seen.
• The workplace sitcom vs. the domestic sitcom.
• Aimlessness in a post-Seinfeld era.
• Abed Ghaith's striptease.
• Is that Abed Ghaith's penis in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
• Claw game skill issues.
• A billionaire trying to figure out how best to do good in the world and who decides to operate several generous claw machines.
• Decorating a desk space with a pocket full of miniature delights.
• Mona Lisa Breakdancing.
• The rice cooker that King Piccolo was trapped in.
• Rubik's Cube but all the faces are Mahjong tiles.
• The coolest and most popular racial atrocity.
• Ramen Man vs. Kikko Man.
• A bowl of ramen in the shape of a tube.
• Homer Simpson: visual ripoff of Kinnikuman.
• Seeing an aquarium fish that looks just slightly too human.
• Reading a book about bugs and itching like mad.
• Worrying that you are ruining eyes for yourself.
• Famous JAV title "Reincarnated as a Spider"
• Conveying the idea of receiving a DM on social media to a television audience.
• My face in a tube dot com.
• Saying "youshmoob" really fast and hoping nobody notices.
• Wanting to put a Russian Roulette scene in your TV show but being unable to negotiate the rights to Russian Roulette from ELORG so you need to hire Alexey Pajitnov to design a replacement game.
• A joke that is very funny when you explain it but impossible to convey in any known medium.
• The flag that says "bang!"
• The Joker not being confident enough in his jokes so he has to use laughing gas.
• Silent Comedy Joker has to work a bit harder.
• Naming a difficulty level after a pop culture allusion to babies.
• The ending of a Clockwork Orange in the UK depicting the protagonist as deciding to renounce violence and become a better person, but in the US they omitted that chapter because it's unrealistic.
• The UK edition of A Clockwork Orange depicting the protagonist renouncing violence and becoming a better person so he joins the police force, whereas in the US edition the protagonist decides to remain brutal and violent so he joins the police force.
• Where's the bridge, Larkin?
• This be the verse you grave for me.
• Poets being jerks to all different kinds of people.
• Kefka creating a tower of garbage in Final Fantasy while everyone tries to convince him it's worthwhile to have a family.
• Which kids inspired Lord of the Flies.
• Suggesting that your mom read Chainsaw Man Part 1 so that you can talk to her about grief.

Support Topic Lords

• Abby
  • https://abbydenton.podbean.com/
• Michael
  • https://www.tinybarbarian.com/
  • https://dawnoftimecomics.com/

Topics:

• That moment when the podcast ads don't play
• Lobsang Rampa
• I had a dream where I needed to recolor my teeth. Why don't video game character creators support this?
• "I've Been Writing You A Poem," by Abby Denton
• Cats you can ride, pre-He Man

Microtopics:

• Cyber Cafe.
• Tiny Barbarian DX.
• An exciting new way to give me money.
• The gamut of barbarian sizes.
• Learning the power of chat from Alan Partridge.
• A podcast deciding that you're not worth advertising to.
• Launching into the jokes and the fiending.
• 99% Inaudible.
• Elvira's lawful good rival.
• Sugarhill Oiljack.
• Roundtree's fruit pastilles.
• A more colorful playful treat time.
• The comic book guy sizing you up and stapling appropriate ads into the comic you're buying.
• Finding out a lot of very interesting information about Texas Railroad Commissioner and forgetting it all immediately.
• Page after page of ads and then a back cover.
• A hardcore Bush-era ad explaining that Klonoa's gonna kill your mom.
• Two Dollar Groos.
• Writing a fan letter to the guy who letters Groo the Wanderer.
• Groo ASMR on GrooTube.
• A man in the 50s. (And the 60s.)
• A plumber from London who found success writing books about Tibetan mysticism.
• What English sounds like to an Italian speaker.
• Prisencolinescionalciusol.
• Lobsang Rampa getting an extra bump from people misspelling Danganronpa.
• Painting your teeth mother of pearl.
• The Xbox 360s mii knockoffs.
• Breath of the Wild's NPC faces.
• Mr. Potato Head Plug and Play Mouth.
• Mainly a tooth-oriented game.
• Dentists wearing a back sack over their head.
• How dentures happen.
• Insulin price caps.
• Explaining to the nice lady who works at the grocery store that the company she works for is monstrous.
• Trashy people in all walks of life.
• Why shouldn't I be able to give Bayonetta missing teeth?
• Post-hoc nightmares where they only upset you after you wake up.
• The bladder comes to me, I don't go to the bladder.
• Changing the scansion on the fly.
• Writing a poem for a relative who won't appreciate it.
• Whether children only like 3D animation now.
• Whether it's cheaper to do 3D or 2D animation.
• Wanting to play with the person you see even though they can't step out of the phone.
• People who love being perceived.
• This poem's threen.
• Vamping about an ambiguous number because of diabetes.
• Feeling shaky even though you are not shaking.
• Fat cats in Washington and what they're sitting on.
• Two people in the universe with perfectly incompatible needs.
• The only member of your family who didn't go into the hard sciences.
• The giant cats in Tom and Jerry going their weird shifting their muscles walk.
• A mockery of a crown.
• There he is; the poopy man.
• Thinking of a man riding on a cat.
• The Lure of the Basilisk.
• The Gandalara Cycle.
• Teleport vs. New Body.
• A big cat-riding opportunity.
• Riding around on a cat made of pure vinyl.
• How did Cringer get like that, Prince Adam?
• Little jokes you do with your partner.
• Wingor, Trunkor and Unkor.
• She-Ra taking it back from the boys.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Erica
• Abby

Topics:

• Scale modeling hacks for broke hobbyists
• Nobody should live here redux: nobody should live here either
• Anal Sampling Mechanism
• Wallace Stevens - The Emperor of Ice Cream
  • https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45234/the-emperor-of-ice-cream
• Andrei Tarkovsky, game designer
  • https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCyzFSsNQYoXBo4zjmTmncoA
  • https://www.youtube.com/c/SulMatul

Microtopics:

• Photoshopping your co-guest's face onto a platypus or maybe it's a beaver.
• Wanting to depict someone as having a really excellent body without knowing what that means to them, so you photoshop a swimming trophy into their hands.
• The claw beavers use to comb oil into their fur.
• An after-dinner lemon.
• Memorably embarrassing yourself as a mnemonic aid.
• Playing along with someone's schemes to get them to leave you alone.
• A cool hacker whose anti-establishment principles drive her to pirate every episode of Digimon.
• Differentiating between the real world and the cyberpunk dystopian future by the number of Digimon available.
• Painting the peg of a loose action figure joint with clear nail polish so the peg gets a little thicker.
• The downtown Los Angeles Gundam shop.
• Not being permitted, socially, to carry around clear nail polish, so you get a flask and write "man juice" on it and pour the nail polish in.
• Man Juice, For Men Only.
• Finding a vice big enough to squish an entire city block.
• Desperately searching for how to do something and finding a single forum post from fifteen years ago, with a single reply from the same poster saying "never mind, figured it out."
• Appealing to 60 year old men who need something to put in their basement.
• When tour wife and kids leave you and your turkey sandwich is dry and lonely.
• Ancient web forums that aren't getting any more radicalized because nobody is posting there any more.
• The scum of mold you get on top of your pickling brine.
• How Koreans deal with moldy kimchi.
• Transcending all human notions of gender by both using blush to make your Gundam model look muddy and using a soldering iron to make it look like it has bullet holes.
• The ways The T-1000 is female-coded, actually, e.g. taking on a child care role, but the filmmakers clothe the robot in a masculine skin for some reason.
• A beaver with a swimming trophy who doesn't want to go in the lake because it's too cold.
• Eating your lemons and sitting in the dark of the lodge, as the winter will soon be over.
• Whether beavers get pruny.
• Why and how to get pruny.
• Animals that have hands.
• Otter brains: too bigs for their skulls.
• Finding out what animals have in store for us.
• Living in a town built over a big bubble of petroleum and your neighbor's yard having the cutest little oil derrick.
• Rinsing off with distilled water after you shower so you don't get a rash.
• Living in a town that has no social scene so on Saturday night you and your friends go downtown and try to track down where that shrimp smell is coming from.
• Gas fields flaring all around the city.
• A combined oil derrick/Bitcoin mining rig that you can plug right into the ground and forget about.
• The ability to voluntarily control defecation.
• The sixth sense that's just in our butts.
• Taking care of you butt consciousness.
• Shitting your pants once and upending all of science.
• Whether anyone poops in Rain World.
• A cat who is also a slug who is also trapped on the Wheel of Samsara.
• Reading a poem and refusing to click on the poem guide that explains what the heck it means.
• Approaching poems as inscrutable puzzle boxes where you have to crack the code to even figure out what the hell they're talking about.
• Approaching making art as aN opportunity to bore the shit out of your friends and family.
• Pulling the theme of a story like a string and the entire story falls open like a sack of grain.
• Demanding more delicious curds and dawdling wenches at your funeral.
• Needing a weird cow to anchor your painting of a grassy field.
• Whether the crowd-pleasers actually have something there. Something other than all the money, I mean.
• Making a funny reference to a contemporary TV commercial in your poem about a funeral.
• The King of Carrot Flowers.
• Busy wrists make for busy minds.
• Stanislaw Lem's "Solaris" as the basis for every video game except for Rain World.
• Stalker and S.T.A.L.K.E.R.
• The mysteries of The Zone and why it exists.
• The Emperor of Ice Cream of Tarkovsky movies.
• Experiencing what is like to live in a non-functional economy.
• Being in the company of a doctor piloting someone through a pandemic-ridden city.
• Stand-Up Tragedy.
• The cheapest way to fame.
• Renaming your PhD thesis "Anal Sampling Mechanism" so your advisor will finally look at it.

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Abby
  • https://twitter.com/mizabitha
  • http://abbydenton.podbean.com/
• John B
  • https://twitter.com/YouOldSoAndSo

Topics:

• The 1998 Tips & Tricks Magazine Video Game Codebook, a Larry Flynt publication that is not porn but, in a certain sense, is not unlike porn
• Why grease 2 is the best superhero musical; a mild defense of the 60s superman musical
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNXbdLDZLKM
• Tower of Druaga
• Cibo Matto - Sugar Water
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EN9auBn6Jys
  • Unedited (syncable) commentary: https://youtu.be/qgqxxX_yLfo
  • https://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/02/17/68-michel-gondry/

Microtopics:

• The illustrious Abby Denton.
• A shambles.
• Locking your Twitter so nobody knows what you're doing in there.
• Making a whole video game magazine out of just the good parts of video game magazines.
• Publishing a series of short stories by formatting them like cheat codes and then submitting them to Tips & Tricks magazine.
• Nostalgia for when most of your perception of the gaming world came from tiny screenshots in magazines.
• A book that is a bunch of fake games and paragraphs about them.
• A duck riding a skateboard.
• Making a book out of a Twitter thread.
• Reading about video games in magazines probably being the optimal experience actually because most games were terrible.
• Game Master Anthony's birthday party.
• Street Fighter 2, the last game in the Street Fighter series.
• NBA Jam arcade as proof that cheat codes are compatible with microtransactions.
• Renting a game just to prove to your friend that the cheat code they heard about doesn't actually work.
• WWF Attitude.
• Enjoying the bouquet of Uniracers.
• A certain quality of gibberish.
• Publishing a fake cheat code in the annual Tips and Tricks monster issue to convey the location of your drug drop.
• Putting Roll back in the Marvel vs. Capcom series.
• A very mild defense.
• Superman fighting a gang of Chinese acrobats portrayed by white heroin addicts.
• Mafiosos cha-cha-ing around the room and chanting "Curtains for Superman!"
• The only Superman story where kryptonite never appears.
• An evil psychoanalyst defeating Superman by convincing him he's just a regular guy.
• Why can't the strongest man in the world be the happiest man in the world?
• Spider-Man: Turn off the Dark.
• Dorky British guys trying to impress Michelle Pfeiffer.
• Giving a three year old a DVD of Grease 2 for her birthday.
• Everything are an opera.
• Just barely losing the Nobel Prize for thirty years in a row.
• Japanese arcade note-sharing culture.
• If Atari 2600 Adventure has a dozen Easter eggs as obscure as its hidden room, and they were all necessary to finish the game.
• One thing the NES is good at.
• The Gilligan's Island game for NES.
• Gilligan's Island for NES being rated only .1 star out of five less than Sonic CD.
• Game Center CX.
• The time you could explore Namco Museum.
• Bubble Bobble.
• Hiding a bunch of stuff in your indie game inspired by Frog Fractions but nobody ever finds it because nobody cared enough about your game.
• Spelunky 2.
• Your stuff per second rate.
• Nightmare of Druaga.
• How to know if you have a friend.
• A Brian De Palma split screen dream.
• Waking up with sugar on your head.
• Michel Gondry's music video ouevre.
• I, Palindrome, I.
• A team of compositors working for six months to bring your one-second idea to fruition.
• Hitting someone with your car and then following them down the street yelling at them.
• A reverse strip club where the performers are moving backwards in time.
• Practicing how to put a reverse-causality shirt on.
• A complete understanding of why Miho Hatori is going to bed with a sugar head.
• Teaching your son how to yawn.
• Playing Doctor Robotnik's Mean Bean Machine with your tiny, tiny feet.
• Jerks welcome!

Support Topic Lords

Lords:

• Abby
  • https://twitter.com/mizabitha
  • http://abbydenton.podbean.com/
• John
  • https://twitter.com/YouOldSoAndSo

Topics:

• A-life and v-pets of the late 90s: why did they die, where do we see them today (pokemon go, etc)
  • Nano Pets commercial with catchy jingle: https://youtu.be/R_KIwHHMVmQ?t=298
  • The only Wappy dog review on Metacritic: https://www.pocketgamer.com/articles/047860/wappy-dog/
  • Stack Up video by Jeremy Parish: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cb8RHzSW2yo
  • Stack Up in WarioWare, Inc.: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WBXh5cLJt4
  • A Long Furby: https://twitter.com/LongFurby/status/1002690751988453379
  • Another Long Furby: https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/long-furby-wife-guy
  • Furby source code: http://www.seanriddle.com/furbysource.pdf
  • DadDoes review of Wappy Dog: http://www.daddoes.com/3912/wappy-dog-review/
• San Diego, CA
  • Everything John forgot to mention: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/San_Diego_County,_California
  • Torrey Pines State Natural Reserve®: https://torreypine.org/
  • Geisel Library: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Geisel_Library
  • San Diego Zoo Safari Park: https://www.sdzsafaripark.org/
  • International Cottages at Balboa Park: http://www.sdhpr.org/
  • Salty licorice/salmiak: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salty_liquorice
  • I have many friends, and am very popular, and awesome, and rumors about my smell are greatly exaggerated- John.
  • San Onofre Nuclear Generating Station: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/San_Onofre_Nuclear_Generating_Station
  • San Diego depicted in the 1998 Midway arcade game California Speed: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u8lSX1aUHQw
  • Hotel del Coronado: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hotel_del_Coronado
  • “Nobody’s perfect.”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mHhr-aaLnI
  • Harmony Gold’s most popular move in years: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qk3p6hIdVeM
  • Send your Robotech questions and comments to: https://twitter.com/marwilliamson
  • California is on fire; get in the van, loser, we’re all moving to Pittsburgh.
• Bloodlust Software and the 90s indie game scene
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rf5KIss6csA
  • https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/9a48z3/the-story-of-nesticle-the-ambitious-emulator-that-redefined-retro-gaming
• Not A Butt Face asks: "Marble Hornets Sex Tape ie. A Found Footage Style Webseries but the footage being sifted through is on Sex Tapes and just out of frame or partially obscured is a lurking unknown creature. Could this ever work?"

Microtopics:

• Being a cyborg and being out of the closet.
• Doing standup comedy in an empty room.
• Figuring out the best way to get a podcast onto your phone.
• Kevin Spacey ruining your podcast.
• A 20th-anniversary digital Tamagotchi.
• F2P Tamagotchi all getting horrible pain disorders that demand you pay daily microtransactions or they just scream all day.
• A large company that operates suspiciously.
• Reading a lot of Newsweek in grade school.
• Getting high on your own supply of Newsweek.
• An eight year old wearing a blazer with elbow pads picking up a Newsweek at the book fair to read about Tamagotchi.
• Shaking the Chao garden to make the Chao fight.
• Whether or not Nintendogs go to heaven.
• Neglecting your real dog because you have an exciting new virtual dog.
• Sickening podcast guests with your Pokemon Go strategies.
• The sensor on Wappy Dog's tail that only exists so it can get upset that you pulled its tail.
• That one banger on the Wappy Dog OST.
• Your Robotic Operating Buddy's ability to pick up discs of a certain size and move them in an arc around itself.
• Playing Stack Up over Skype and having to call your friend and have him reset the puzzle whenever ROB fucks up and drops the pieces on the floor.
• The baffling absence of YouTube videos of Gizmo Furby interacting with Yoda Furby.
• Steven Spielberg patrolling the internet for videos of Gizmo Furby talking to Yoda Furby and shutting them the heck down because that's not canon. (George Lucas is fine with it.)
• A village of Furbies living on after the extinction of the human race.
• Yes! Dad does!
• Wappy Dog being immortal, but if he did die somehow he'd go straight to hell.
• Pikachu turning to the player and asking "who was the last person you kissed?"
• Trying to make a game that creates the same reaction in every player.
• Confusing Yoot Saito and Noob Saibot.
• Playing SimCity 2000 on a Game Boy Advance.
• Becoming a chef so that you can figure out why burritos are better in San Diego than anywhere else in the world.
• A library raised up in little feet with a swirly tail called The Spang-Dangler Building.
• A library that looks like a big concrete tree.
• A library that looks like a space invader.
• Discovering Finnish Salty Licorice and finally not having to share your candy with your friends.
• Lurking in the floorboards so that you can visit your introvert friend without them noticing.
• Those big concrete nipples on Camp Pendleton.
• Driving from Camp Pendleton to Mexico in less than a minute and then turning around and driving across an aircraft carrier.
• Doctor Seuss's favorite San Diego hangouts.
• Whether Jack Lemmon likes it hot in the ending of Some Like It Hot.
• Taking part in the panda breeding program in the 70s.
• Not knowing what the San Diego Convention Center looks like outside of Comic Con and just assuming it's always swarming with nerds.
• None of the speakers showing up for the big Robotech panel at Wondercon so the marketing director steps up with PowerPoint presentation describing Robotech merch.
• Everyone losing their shit over Robotech skate decks.
• Singing and dancing when the sky turns black.
• Trying to hide violence from children so the children rebel by celebrating violence as much as possible.
• A full-featured Mortal Kombat clone developed by two high school students.
• Whether One Must Fall stands up.
• Choosing to release the first free-and-good-enough NES emulator and calling it NESticle.
• How the mouse pointer for NESticle was actually a severed hand, and only the Windows icon was a scrotum.
• Keeping your emulation legit by deleting your ROMs every 24 hours.
• The only place the long-rumored SNESticle was ever released.
• How early SNES emulators didn't handle transparency so you had to manually toggle the cloud layer in order to see anything.
• Shock value Flash cartoons before and after 9/11.
• A gif of a plane crashing into Oprah.
• Going into work each day with the intent of trying to get fired.
• Who today is carrying on the Bloodlust Software ethos.
• Making the same ultra-violent video game as everyone else but adding narration explaining that "violence is bad and this game is important."
• A hyper-detailed art style evocative of biology and gross innards without actually depicting any gore.
• A tasteful logo that represents a butt pooping.
• A barely-visible monster lurking in the background of every video uploaded to Pornhub.
• Porkin' Across America.
• Finding people who were already going to make a series of sex tapes and offering to lurk in the background in your Slenderman costume.
• Training a neural network to insert Slenderman into the background of every movie.
• Writing erotic House of Leaves fan fiction and waiting for the Internet to discover and reenact it.
• An art critic giving your life a B+.

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